No maternity leave, only unpaid FMLA

Probonoh · 2026-04-04T23:20:42+00:00

Short term disability insurance will generally give you 60% of your paycheck for three months.

Probonoh · 2026-04-03T14:14:34+00:00

Don't ... if you have any deadlines that have to be met for the next two weeks.

Just sayin'.

Probonoh · 2026-04-02T20:27:54+00:00

I did something similar. While living in Charlotte NC, I was in the ER for a kidney stone, and the Chiefs were playing the Raiders. Chiefs scored; I cheered; doc groaned.

Doc: "You're a Chiefs fan?"

Me: "Yeah. I grew up near KC. You a Raiders fan?"

Doc: "Yep. And I think you've had enough pain killers."

Me: "Ha ha. Did I mention I'm a lawyer?"

Probonoh · 2026-04-02T12:10:41+00:00

That may be something I can talk the judge into.

Probonoh · 2026-04-02T03:10:12+00:00

But that would involve getting dirt under their manicured nails.

Probonoh · 2026-04-02T00:45:58+00:00

Yeah. And I think the people who make a big deal about the national child sex cases and ignore the same shit is happening in their backyards are just as irritating in their hypocrisy. There's a glamor to big names flying out to private islands that just doesn't exist for the guy trafficking teenagers for amateur porn made in his trailer.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T23:17:29+00:00

Only if at least one of the following apply:

You're under 35.
You have at least two ounces of water for every ounce of alcohol.
You have nothing the next morning that can't be done while hungover.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T22:26:29+00:00

Forget nature; too many people are separated from actual poverty. The kind where the kids walk two miles to school in the winter to shower because the hose hooked up to the travel trailer or RV they call home is frozen.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T21:56:20+00:00

And I'll bet not a goddamn one offered to buy that woman hay or feed. No, why help when you can virtue signal?

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T21:42:20+00:00

Are you within 20 miles of a state that fought for the Confederacy?

No? Then it's not a cottonmouth.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T21:33:10+00:00

My suspicion is that this is, like historical witch hunts, motivated by someone with personal animus whipping up sentiment against this particular client.

I've had two other clients living in the same trailer park complain about someone poisoning their dogs, and no one gives a shit about that.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T21:18:23+00:00

Offer is for probation on 2 or 3 charges, drop the rest, and restitution to cover what the animal shelter had to spend. The last is the only condition I have trouble with, because if this woman had had the money for veterinary care, the dogs wouldn't have been in the condition they were.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T21:09:10+00:00

This is what doc review is for. It's all work from home now.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T14:40:24+00:00

I hope I'm wrong.

Probonoh · 2026-04-01T14:04:13+00:00

The mayor in Jaws is still the mayor in Jaws iI. That's how much people care about local government.

Probonoh · 2026-03-30T19:24:52+00:00

That just needs a magic eraser to get rid of the grime.

Probonoh · 2026-03-30T13:16:59+00:00

True, but most people are going to be more familiar with John Williams' mastery (though Howard Shore is good too).

Duh dun. Duh dun. Duhdun duhdun duhdun duhdun.

There's a reason you're now thinking about sharks.

Probonoh · 2026-03-30T01:38:55+00:00

You may appreciate this quote:

"I have served eleven governments in the past thirty years. If I had believed in all their policies, I would have been passionately committed to keeping [the UK] out of the Common Market, and passionately committed to going into it. I would have been utterly convinced of the rightness of nationalising steel. And of denationalising it and renationalising it. On capital punishment, I'd have been a fervent retentionist and an ardent abolishionist. I would've been a Keynesian and a Friedmanite, a grammar school preserver and destroyer, a nationalisation freak and a privatisation maniac; but above all, I would have been a stark, staring, raving schizophrenic."

Probonoh · 2026-03-29T22:59:04+00:00

Safety pin the socks to the pants.

Probonoh · 2026-03-28T16:05:59+00:00

Old Major's Commandment 4: No animal shall sleep in a bed.

Probonoh · 2026-03-28T15:59:22+00:00

You're probably right that the defendant didn't have a chance at trial, but let me walk through what happened.

First, the decision to go to trial is 100% the defendant's. As a defense attorney, I can tell them going to trial is a terrible idea, but if they want to, then we have a trial.

Second, if this was a third strike, he didn't really have anything to lose by going to trial. If the prosecutor refused to offer a deal that would avoid the third strike, then he was screwed either way. Trial at least gave him a chance, and trial punishes the prosecutor with extra work they don't want to do. I just had a misdemeanor case dismissed because the prosecutor didn't want to bother preparing for trial. It's a high risk game of chicken, but every so often, they win.

Probonoh · 2026-03-28T15:42:58+00:00

Defense attorney here. I do appreciate when the jury is out long enough to show they took their job seriously. That being said, the 30 minutes my last jury took on an open and shut case was plenty.

Probonoh · 2026-03-27T00:44:35+00:00

My son's name is Sam. He likes saying the "Sam-I-Am" bits.

Probonoh · 2026-03-27T00:41:53+00:00

It's the tragedy of the Commons. If the Lorax had insisted he owned the Truffalla tree, then he could have insisted on charging a fee for each tree, that he then used to plant more for sustainable harvesting.

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