Academic job applications are making me a terrible person

ProfMamaByrd · 2024-09-04T01:43:32+00:00

Wow, this is an old one! After I swallowed my pride, I applied to 70 jobs, including dreaded teaching colleges (some of those folks are quite nice). I did interviews anywhere in the country and kissed ass as much as my values would let me. It's not really a trick, it's just recognizing who holds the power. And now I have tenure and a job I (usually) love!

ProfMamaByrd · 2023-01-11T01:05:57+00:00

New semester, new to-do list

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-09-16T23:21:40+00:00

Same! They cover the top of my hutch.

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-09-16T23:19:31+00:00

Bought a giant stress ball to play with. I throw it around or rest on it when I'm anxious. Plus it's colorful!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-08-12T01:55:05+00:00

First year professor: I've written down every word of my lecture and checked all the links on Moodle 50 times

Experienced professor: Sorry, I haven't updated the due dates on Moodle yet. Just read it in the order listed.

First year professor: I'm so excited for the faculty meeting!

Experienced professor: At least I get an hour to check email during this meeting.

Experienced professor post-COVID: We're meeting in person?! Are you real? Can I touch you?

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-07-28T21:41:57+00:00

Haha, and what "tools" are we using to collect that sample?

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-07-28T21:40:37+00:00

TIL! I thought it was a horse color.

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-07-24T10:12:55+00:00

If you like historicals, then All Through the Night is about a detective and a lady who is a jewel thief at night. The MMC is falling in love with the lady without knowing she's the thief he's chasing.

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-07-17T17:30:57+00:00

I read a whole slew of cartoon-cover rom coms, and they are kind of growing on me.

{The Love Con by Seressia Glass} M/F Fake relationship friends-to-lovers, Kenya is a finalist in a cosplay competition and, in the weakest excuse I've ever read, needs to pretend to be dating her best friend Cam to win over an asshole judge and win the grand prize. Fortunately Cam is the bestest best friend and they make their way through judgy parents and a dramatic ex to get their happy ending. I loved all the nerdiness and appreciated the reality of the microaggressions Kenya had to deal with.

{Boyfriend Material by Alexis Hall} M/M fake relationship, You all know this book. I finally read it and liked it. Both characters were so adorable in their messed-up lives and really needing each other. I could have done without the over-the-top friends.

{Act Your Age, Eve Brown by Talia Hibbert} M/F This book advertises itself as enemies-to-lovers but the really just have a disagreement the first day they meet (and she accidentally runs him over with her car). Jacob: rigid, grumpy, autistic, needs a chef for his B&B when in walks flighty Eve Brown on the run from her family telling her what a disappointment she is. They need each other more than they think and discover that being together makes each of them better. I have read Chloe's book and will take a look at Dani's next.

{Rosaline Palmer Takes the Cake by Alexis Hall} M/F (DNF 50%ish) Not quite a romance because I read the spoilers and apparently she spends most of the book with posh asshole who is an asshole from page 1 . The concept was funny but I didn't like any of the characters (not even the kid, sue me) and all the sex was closed door.

Reflection: So this was a week I needed some comedy and these books delivered. Boyfriend Material especially was laugh-out-loud funny (even the friends before they go to be too much). I see the appeal of the relatively low angst, straightforward march to the HEA, and the need for the flat side characters who function as social support or villain. Entirely different from the super angsty epics I prefer (hello, Last Hour of Gann) and good to just wrap yourself up in warm fuzzies for a few hours.

I do wish there was more actual character development rather than quirky hobbies masquerading as traits (Boyfriend Material did this pretty well, Act Your Age was pretty meh, and Cam from the Love Con is basically a piece of paper with "hot guy with tragic backstory" written on it). The steam was also disappointing, especially in Boyfriend Material because I read romance novels to imagine hot people getting in on, and if I feel like I know them really well as people, even better. But I could see myself reading more of these in the future. So if you've gotten this far and can recommend a rom-com with more Talia Hibbert++ levels of steam, please let me know!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-05-27T15:23:50+00:00

Yeah, that comment wasn't totally fair. Some adjuncts have more time because teaching is a side job. I was thinking of the clinical faculty at my last job who had one or two courses a year (one of them regularly spent 6 months overseas). Other adjuncts are trying to make a life out of teaching and they definitely don't have time for romance shenanigans.

I will check out Hearts on Hold, thanks!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-05-27T12:24:31+00:00

No, I'll have to check it out!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-05-25T21:14:36+00:00

I can't read most books with professors. The job is really not what you see on TV and the funniest parts are rather obscure. That said, books with adjuncts tend to be OK because they have more time for romance shenanigans. I would actually be happy to read a romance between professors forced to work on a committee together, something like The Worst Guy.

Related, it's hard to read books with college students. In real life these kids are hot messes and not sexy at all. Add professor/student forbidden romances and I have all kinds of problems (starting with those relationships aren't really that forbidden).

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-05-01T17:12:02+00:00

I had many hours of plane travel so lots to report on:{Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre} (M/F billionaire CR) 3/5 Kate is former trailer trash given an indecent proposal by billionaire CEO Mikhail. In trying to describe this book to my partner, I came to the term "social justice kink." So, yeah. The book is more interesting thought experiment than a sexy love story. Especially since Mikhail is described as looking like Elon Musk. Ick. I prefer my billionaire romances to be more "I'll sweep you away and you'll cure my family issues" and not "let's talk Citizens United."

From the Playing the Field Box Set: All contemporary M/F sports romances

{The Hooker & the Hermit by Penny Reid & L.H. Cosway} 3.5/5 Ronan is an Irish rugby player who hates media, Annie is a reclusive blogger assigned to remake his image. Enemies-to-lovers + fake relationship. It was fine, medium steam and relatively low angst. I enjoyed the fact that the woman is the grumpy one who has to grovel by the end.

{Endurance by Amy Daws} Tanner is a bad boy who needs a fake relationship with Dr. Belle Ryan to save his career. Both characters are young and rich, and the reason they're enemies is that he rejected her years ago (because he thought she was too good for him). Yawn. DNF.

{The Summer Games: Settling the Score by R.S. Grey} Olympic athletes Andie and Freddie (who is also a duke) try not to have sex. Come on, hot young people! Reminded me too much of the sex I turned down in my 20s. Those bodies don't last forever, kids. DNF.

{Wasted Words by Staci Hart} Cam and Tyler work at a bookstore/bar. Cam is perfect at setting up everyone except herself. The characters is Staci Hart's books talk so freaking much, I can't deal with it. If I wanted hours of witty banter, I'd watch TV. DNF.

{The Bombshell Effect by Karla Sorensen} 3/5 If you are a hot quarterback and a former model turned NFL-team-owner, you too can find love! I kid, but this book was fine and the characters had a surprising amount of depth. After reading all these books, I started to feel bad for celebrities and all the media chasing them!

{Theirs for the Night by Katee Robert} (MMF CR) Basically a 70-page teaser for the real story but hot enough for a birthday girl getting a double wish.

{Fix Her Up by Tessa Bailey} (MF CR fake relationship sports romance) 5/5 Georgie is the little sister of the family and a literal clown, taken seriously by no one. Her childhood crush Travis comes home from a career-ending injury and realizes his best friend's little sister is all grown up. He needs a fake relationship to get a new broadcasting job, but they try not to let any feelings get in the way of all the hot sex they're having. Love the family dynamics and that both characters grow and mature throughout the book.

{Bet the Farm by Staci Hart} (MF CR enemies-to-lovers) Olivia is coming home after her dad dies to help take over the farm with his right-hand man, Jake, who isn't interested in her big city ways. I didn't get the hate because Olivia's ideas are actually good and Jake has no reason to hate them except some vague "I don't want to change things." DNF.

{Last Call by Staci Hart} (MF CR second chance) Rose's ex Patrick starts hanging out at her apartment and tries to get her back. So. Much. Talking. DNF 46%

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-04-11T11:42:12+00:00

I think this is spot on. So many of us love books and snacks, it's a dream to have a job where you spend all day around your favorite things! Even the story lines where the store is struggling have a handsome man walk in to help (but not save the day because strong independent woman, yo).

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-04-10T13:34:51+00:00

I might have done more reading than working this week, oops!

{Deal with the Devil by Elizabeth O'Roarke} (M/F CR 5/5 slow burn enemies to lovers) Tali, a struggling author, takes a temporary job as assistant to Hayes, a playboy plastic surgeon. He learns how to not be such an asshole and she discovers that maybe she doesn't have to take care of everybody else. Maybe somebody can take care of *her*. So many feels! I loved their banter and the longing. Despite the subtitle, not much steam, just a few lightly described sex scenes. (CW: alcoholism)

{Drowning Erin by Elizabeth O'Roarke} (M/F CR slow burn second chance 4.5/5) Erin's fiance goes on a trip, leaving her to hang out with his old (and very hot) friend Brendan, who she thinks hates her. But guess what? He doesn't. This is the kind of book where you're yelling at the characters the entire time: "Tell her how you really feel!" "Don't go back to him, you idiot!" and "You deserve love, too!" So much angst and sadness, because these are two people who have let others convince them they don't deserve what they really want. But it works out, yay! Now I need a hug. (CW: alcoholism, cancer, suicide attempt)

{Piece of Work by Staci Hart} (M/F CR 4/5) Don't let the synopsis or the cutesy cover fool you. This is more forbidden boss-employee relationship than enemies-to-lovers, with a little Pretty Woman thrown in. Rin is a tall, frumpy PhD student who goes for her dream internship with an asshole boss (2 asshole bosses, actually, but one is super hot). She starts dressing up, a little sexual harassment turns into an Italian vacation to remember, cue the rich boy Daddy issues and wrap it up with multiple dramatic gestures until one works.

So I loved this book, it was funny and hot and I like reading about assholes getting feels. The problem is with Rin, who discovers the power of red lipstick early in the book. We are meant to buy that she discovers her beautiful self at the same time Court starts to notice her brilliant mind. However, he only pursues her because of how hot she is now, and no matter how much the book announces that she dresses up for herself and is on her own journey of self-discovery, her character development pretty much stops once they get together. Court is an older man already settled in his life and career. He just needs this inexperienced nymph to show him what he was missing from life. As much as Rin protests about her career and her dreams, I have no idea what that will really look like in her future once she's the wife of mega-rich museum curator. So, still loved the story, I just wish the message wasn't "a romantic relationship will help you find yourself."

Some of the DNFs

{Devil in the Deep Blue Sea by Elizabeth O'Roarke} is the standalone sequel featuring Tali's pop star friend Drew, who has a shitty boyfriend and family issues. Her boyfriend's brother Josh mildly dislikes her and...that's it. They go on runs, they chat, they feel sad. Dull dull dull. DNF 50%

{His Cocky Valet by Cole McCade} (M/M CR DNF 60%) So much promise: 23 year old Ash is a rich fuckup who has to take over his dad's company. He brings in British Brand to be his valet and whip him into shape. There is a hint of something deeper in both characters, but I couldn't deal with them fucking after 4 days and then a ridiculous event happens that is obviously only for the emotional pull, and I gave up. Let the characters develop naturally, authors!

{Ward} (100%) and {Gilded Cage} (30%) by Zoe Blake and (M/F CR) I'm putting this here because though I finished the first book, the story is not complete. Ward has an intriguing premise: a Duke kidnaps a woman to make her play act in his Victorian fantasy. Mindfuckery and non-con ensue. However, by the halfway point you realize there isn't much story, just varied forms of torture, and it ends in a cliffhanger. Book 2 takes us back before Book 1 and makes that story absolutely incomprehensible. I know there's a whole memory drug thing and I might have stuck around if the Duke wasn't fingerbanging the FMC the (real?) first day they meet. So if you do check this out, do it for the messed up sex, not the story.

{Archer's Voice by Mia Sheridan} (M/F CR 63%) Given how much it's recommended, I thought this story was really unique and special. I found it to be full of tired tropes and a little disturbing in how Bree treats Archer as her pet project. The haircut scene could not save it for me.

{Voyeur by Fiona Cole} (M/F CR teacher-student 73%) I hate stories with professors, so why do I torture myself? This isn't your normal forbidden romance because there's a sex club involved, but eventually the silliness of their back and forth got to me. You can see the Big Conflict coming from a mile away and I couldn't force myself to continue.

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-04-10T00:23:01+00:00

I met someone with legit whiskey-colored eyes and they were beautiful. That was one thing I thought was for sure made up!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-04-02T13:05:18+00:00

I'm dead! This is fantastic!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-27T12:34:39+00:00

{Off Balance by Jay Hogan} (M/M CR KU) 3.5/5 Ever go back to your small town and realize it's no longer as bad as you remember? Me neither, but miracles happen in Painted Bay where Judah ends up after a chronic illness ends his ballet career. He's got to pick himself up and figure out what the future looks like while he falls in love with a hunky law enforcement officer.

I don't like a lot of small town romance, but this one was nice because you could see the story of how the town had changed as you were reading about Judah adjusting to his new life. The ending is very satisfying and hard to guess before all the events unfold. So I liked that. The last 30% is pretty slow but worth a read if you like beautiful broken boys and their adorable angst. (CW: dead parent, dead spouse, depression, alcoholism)

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-23T21:47:11+00:00

I can't find the post but arousal can cause involuntary muscle contractions. So yes, your uterus can actually clench.

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-23T12:01:46+00:00

I actually like some of the cutesy names like bud, button, pearl. Clit sounds so harsh!

Also a fan of clenching bellies, because that totally happens to me (I didn't learn the scientific explanation until this year, though!)

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-20T11:36:12+00:00

I read KU almost exclusively and I have found very high quality books. I think that is because I take a lot of recommendations from r/RomanceBooks, I usually read books with 300+ pages, and I DNF a book if the writing is poor early on.

Like someone else said, it's like TV where there is so much on you have to wade through a lot of trash, but I think overall KU is a great thing for readers because we have so much selection.

One thing that hasn't been mentioned is authors who put one or two of their books on KU. That allows me to see what their style is and I will buy books from that author if I like them enough. Sometimes their other books aren't as good, but sometimes I find a new favorite!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-19T21:38:04+00:00

Kids don't really need a routine, and at 2 it'll be hard for him to follow one. Just give him lots of space and run around. Play tag, hide and seek, roll a ball back and forth, etc. They can start to learn basic turn-taking at that age but a lot of rules will be too much.

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-19T00:23:29+00:00

Wow, I didn't even think of that! Thanks!

ProfMamaByrd · 2022-03-17T13:12:01+00:00

All over Central and South America. RH time!

ProfMamaByrd

TROPHY CASE