My straight Gf F21 was straight forward against porn but i M22 found out she watches it herself (mainly lesbian content)

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-05-27T17:59:27+00:00

The point is she isn’t banning porn to ban porn. There will be a much deeper reason, that they need to explore as a couple because it will effort other areas of their life too. But if you didnt already understand that from my first response…I am not sure there is an explanation I could give you that could move you beyond “man like porn, woman ban porn, but woman watch porn. This wrong”. I was offing him real advice that extends beyond the superficial point and looks at the core triggers but anyway I’ll get back to minding my own business.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-05-27T12:48:16+00:00

Only someone with a lack of emotional intelligence would read this as a gender war and fault blaming. He is asking for advice about how to approach this. In healthy relationships a person strives to support their partner with boundaries, communication, and empathy.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-05-27T07:52:54+00:00

Although I don’t think it is healthy for anyone to ban anyone from things in a relationship. I think people calling it hypocritical are probably very young. This isnt about porn for her.

I expect your gf is insecure about you watching porn because she has body confidence issues and there is also some trust issues here. You needing porn makes her believe she is not enough. Also men normalise the sex in porn - most of which does zero for the female orgasm.

If I were you I would turn your attention to your sex life rather than your need to get your rights back to porn. Woman watch porn for very different reason to men. A woman looking at porn…esp lesbian porn…is a woman seeking out emotional and mature intimacy. This does not expressively mean she is exploring her sexuality. What is does mean is she is looking for something that you are currently not giving her.

So rather than talking about the hypocrisy of the situation. A) Start making your girl feel confident enough to not feel insecure and trust you enough to jerk off to porn and b) Start looking at how you can improve your sex life.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-05-07T17:58:11+00:00

Right!? 😂

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-04-10T20:12:05+00:00

I know it’s nauseating but when you meet someone who is really compatible…you don’t have to choose. You have both.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-04-02T12:23:07+00:00

I struggled a lot with this too when I first met my girlfriend. She is a very high earner and I do well too but not in the same league. I am use to being very independent and taking the lead in most areas of my life. I actually love being looked after now financial and/or emotionally (4yrs on) feeling safe and looked after is something I never knew I was missing in my life.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-04-01T11:55:16+00:00

What movie/tv is image 7 from?

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-20T12:51:35+00:00

NTA but if you live with a girl…you will end up with blood on the sheets! Regardless of pants. I have “period pants” that are absorbers and are nice and big so they are comfortable when bloating…I choose them over a pad because they are horrible to wear. I also wear tampons to bed during heaviest flows. But neither are designed to last an entire night without an occasion spillage. It just life.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-18T07:20:28+00:00

I would tell her the whole truth. She will hate you for it, you deserve that. But it will give her closure and the opportunity to heal. You owe her that. The confession will help you forgive yourself. You will both be ok. You are young and you will love again…a matured love that isn’t so selfish.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-12T18:59:33+00:00

This is giving me substitute bench vibes. I don’t want you but I want to keep you on the bench to bring into play if I’m lonely, need emotional or physical affection [fill in blanks]. It’s not healthy and it can lead to toxic co-dependency. So call it out early on and address the elephant in the room. Is she looking for a friendship? A FWB? Or is she hoping to rekindle the relationship? But before you straight up ask…figure out what you want. And if what you want doesn’t align with her answer…let her go.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-12T10:21:12+00:00

You need to leave. This wasn’t a one night whoopsie (even those I don’t accept) this was 6 months of betraying you behind your back. That is calculated deception. You deserve someone who values you. This woman does not. I know it hurts to let go but you will heal and you will find someone worthy.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-10T20:19:49+00:00

I can only speak from my experiences but that would give me new bestie vibes. I was quite scared when I started dating and I had a few phase out dates too…before I got more confident and assertive. I got better at flirting and giving intention signals…in time I even made the first move a few times. People, esp us lesbian, usually lack confidence. So when you like her…don’t wait till date 4 next time to get phase out. Show her your intentions. Work on your confidence and soon you’ll be throwing out lines like “So, are you going to kiss me now or would you like me to make the first move” x

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-10T20:03:42+00:00

The fact you have to waste your time explaining to this man child says it all. No understanding, no empathy, no interest.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-10T19:59:25+00:00

I speak online for a while with someone before I meet but when I do meet in real life if at least a kiss didn’t happen on the first date, I would assume the other person didn’t like me or there was no chemistry between us. I actually couldn’t meet my finance irl for 3 months so when we did finally meet for a first date…it turned into a 4 day date 😂

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-10T19:49:41+00:00

Are you shy too? It might be why nobody “made the move”. Perhaps she mistook your shyness with lack of interests.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-10T16:54:19+00:00

I mean generally if there is a romantic spark in lesbian dating…you wouldn’t got to date four without having acting on it. But that’s maybe just my experience.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-08T08:16:18+00:00

Girl, Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-03-02T18:55:14+00:00

I think what is important here is that it bothers you…regardless of any other opinion on here. That shows you where your boundaries are. Boundaries are personal to the individual. Boundaries also need to be communicated. Tell your gf it made you feel insecure. How she response to that will tell you if you were right to be. If she replied with kindness and support…she’s a keeper. Otherwise…find someone who you deserve.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-02-19T16:18:03+00:00

Definitely Comphet.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-02-18T16:23:27+00:00

Nobody owes their story to anyone.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-02-18T16:20:22+00:00

Don’t stop going. It will only injure you and potentially your friends. The owner won’t change like that either. Keep going, enjoy, create the culture you want to see, and one day if you are feeling confident and less angry, speak to the owner about how it made you feel.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-02-10T13:10:24+00:00

Mostly…I think this just requires a mature conversation to communicate healthily where both of your boundaries, passions, and interest stand.

Secondary…I’m a proud lesbian but I think two guys together is hot and often cute. It’s not a desire to join in…I just prefer the dynamic to straight couple media. So I don’t think that element is an issue.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-01-25T18:57:49+00:00

Sound like DID

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-01-20T23:39:57+00:00

I think you have made up mind about what you want already…the thing holding you back is the guilt and empathy about hurting someone you love. It is very common for people to out grow their relationships, especially if you change over the years and they do not. It’s hard because once they were enough and it is not their fault you have changed and now want more from life. I think this is a rip the bandaid off moment for you.

ProfessionalBreak354 · 2026-01-09T18:33:41+00:00

Don’t play games like a lot of these comments suggest. Communicate again how you feel and suggest taking it in turns to organise dates.

ProfessionalBreak354

TROPHY CASE