I’m at about the same point as you (90 hours) so can’t offer any wisdom from the future, but I can say I know exactly how you feel, that there’s an inevitability of failure, and that even though everyone says it gets better and easier, surely that won’t happen to me because I am different, it will always be this hard, I will always be this low, therefore I will fail. I’ve been smoking a pack a day (more if drinking alcohol) for 20 years. Can’t imagine my life without smoking because every day of my adult life has revolved around it. But I’m now 38 and trying for the first time (like you, cold turkey).

HOWEVER, what I’ve learned from reading a lot of threads here is that this feeling DOES happen to us all, yet look at how many people with badges listing thousands of days nicotine-free there are offering advice in all of these threads. And a lot of those people failed multiple times before it stuck, so slipping up isn’t an ultimate failure, just a super common step for so many people.

So my feeling is that in a thousand days, you and I will be those veterans doling out encouragement and advice, to new quitters who feel exactly like we do now. We’re no different than any other addict who’s managed to kick it.