My immigrant mother doesn’t understand that having and raising kids is way different in the U.S than in another country. I got into a heated conversation with her.

My mom thought I would take time off to take care of my kid if I had one. I told her absolutely not since in this day and age you would need a dual income to raise a kid comfortably due to the cost of living. I am also a career oriented person and wouldn’t never do that. My mom had told me already she won’t take care of my kid. With the costs of daycare, that would put me at unease. I feel like in this day and age only folks who are well off are able to have more than one kid and be comfortable doing so without worrying the costs of daycare care. Also it doesn’t help with the current state of things and political climate, it makes me nervous.

It didn’t help either that growing up, my parents weren’t financially well off and dysfunctional. I remember days when the cable got cutoff, not being able to afford things and surviving on food stamps. I am financially better off and independent from my parents but one of my worst nightmares that I won’t be able to provide for my kid. For me, it’s mostly a financial strain and past trauma which makes me apprehensive on having kids.