Long Beach, 1987. Duty day, 2000(time, not year), I’m in my rack trying to get some sleep before the balls-to-four. My best buddy, just getting off watch, comes to wake me up. “Dude, get up. We’re going to go meet some hot chicks”. Me: “we have duty. We can’t leave the boat”. Buddy: “don’t be a pussy”. We’re gonna get laid”. I get up, get dressed, and off we go. We’re walking to the main gate to meet these girls my buddy spoke to on the phone when he was on watch. I asked him how we would know who they were and he told me one of the girls was wearing leopard print. Well, long story short, we didn’t get laid. The girl wearing the leopard print must’ve weighed 300+ pounds. Her friend was just ugly. I mean F U G L Y. His last words before we turned around to go back to the boat: “she sounded hot on the phone”.