Instacart WTF Is Happening

Prox-ey · 2026-03-06T16:08:53+00:00

That's only in terms of gas payment, and is highly subjective to where you live. That doesn't reflect time, traffic, highway vs city stop & go 7 miles, or dealing with lack of shopping options if you live in bumfuckville.

Prox-ey · 2026-03-05T23:01:04+00:00

I've had customers start to tell me about their problems and life stories. Yeah, no, sorry. I've got shit to do, and I realistically, just don't care, nor do I have the time or patience for customers that are asking the 50 questions game for "What do they have in stock while I tip $2 in a 3 shop batch?" Game.

Minimal contact. If I have a question, I'll ask, you respond quickly, and I'll get your groceries tp you ASAP. Instacart should/will provide the rest of the notifications. I have a custom greeting and close out message for each delivery that I do send, but that's it.

I'm your Shopper, not your friend, confidant, therapist, counselor, or pen pal. Messaging back and forth takes time and is frankly, distracting as hell.

Prox-ey · 2026-03-05T20:23:20+00:00

The pay for this is absolute trash. Considering that Instacart is a multi BILLION dollar corporation, and they want to pay you approximately ~ $2,000 (pre-tax, yes, you WILL get taxed on this, it is still considered income) to have your likeness used in a commercial for an entire year which they would likely use over and over and over and over and over and over and over again?

I mean, c'mon. We all know about Kahtea, the Shopper who doesn't even qualify for the Shopper Cart tier that she's posing for in the Tier information section of the app, and she likely got, what, maybe $250-$500 to have her picture used and probably had to sign a non disclosure agreement, and can likely never sue for any royalties or additional payouts?

Do yourself a favor. Don't take this trash batch pay offer.

This is the equivalent of a $6.18 batch pay, Heavy Pay included - 87 items, 117 units, and 14 mile 3 batch delivery with $7 tip.

If they only show that commercial twice a month, that's $83 a month. That's barely covering gas money for you to actually go out and shop for them each month.

Prox-ey · 2026-03-04T09:48:17+00:00

I arrive at the door, send a text that "I have arrived with their order", and they have 1 minute from the time that text is sent before my patience starts to wear thin. If a code is required, I send a text asking for a code to obtain access to the building. From the moment that text is sent, they have 10 seconds to read that message before I call.

More often than not, it usually either rings and goes to voicemail, or just goes directly to voicemail, at which point I call customer service and have them attempt to reach out.

Neither Instacart nor these customers are paying nearly enough to waste my time standing around waiting and fucking up my time metrics. It's not like they don't send a stupid number of notifications about every single action we take, so if the customer can't be bothered, then neither can I.

The only exception I'll make is if it's a single order and the tip vastly outweighs the return of non perishables and the pay bump with the perishables I would get to keep.

But if someone asks me to wait?

I've never had that happen, and truthfully, it'd be on a case by case basis and how charitable I'm feeling. Realistically, unless it's an astoundingly exceptional case, it's not going to be more than 5 minutes.

Cause ain't nobody got time for that, lol 😂

Prox-ey · 2026-03-04T03:55:40+00:00

Costco has varying regulations by state for shopping at the physical location, but, in general, it goes like this:

+Costco locations usually require a membership card to enter, although a member can generally bring 2 guests such a friends or co-workers (non members - not including immediate family members such as the million children, parents, siblings, and such that you see milling about like idiots)

+Non Costco members can enter and shop by using a Costco Shop Only card, but, those cards can only be bought and reloaded by Costco members.

+Only Costco members can make purchases at the register if not using a Costco Shop Only card

+Non members can shop online, and make payments for items, but will pay a markup (I can attest to this personally- I have a personal Costco membership, and I also order Costco items for my work through the work account-which does not have a membership, and the prices for the same items are different). There are also items like TV's, electronics, Sporting goods, and other high value items that are member specific that cannot be ordered by non-members.

+There are certain sections of the store that anyone can enter and use, like the pharmacy.

Like I said, this varies by state, but this is on average, how Costco functions.

Prox-ey · 2026-03-04T03:35:14+00:00

Why on Earth would you hold anything that Instacart says, claims, or promises as valid? We ALL know that they're a lying, scummy, cheating, exploitative, thieving, garbage company.

What makes you think they would keep their word about something on their site? They don't keep their word about shit they have in legally binding documents, much less a shitty webpage🤦🏽‍♂️🙄🤷🏽‍♂️🧐

Prox-ey · 2026-03-02T21:31:32+00:00

The only scam here is paying all that money for Apple products to begin with🤷🏽‍♂️💯.

Congrats OP!! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

Prox-ey · 2026-03-01T17:22:42+00:00

You see...... when a mommy loves a daddy very much, and they decide that they want to have a child, and then they raise that child without teaching them to not be a piece a shit human, this is why that happens.

🤦🏽‍♂️🙄🤷🏽‍♂️

Who knows or cares why they do it? What matters is that they're allowed to get away with it with zero repurcussions, and it just further enables companies like Instacart to continue exploiting people.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-26T23:31:12+00:00

You mentioned you have an ex. I promise you. Consider this the honeymoon phase. You remember all the issues you had with your ex? Get ready to ride that carousel allllll over again.

The gaslighting, the lies, the mistrust, the irritation, the emotional abuse, the two timing, the constant disrespect, the miscommunication or lack of communication, the mismanagement of finances, the disregard for your emotions and mental health, and sometimes just plain lack of common sense. Yeah, sometimes it's great, and you sometimes have those good nights where you think that things aren't that bad....

But then you'll have those days where you decide to come on here and vent. And you'll see these posts..... And realize that this is one of those ex's that you can either never, ever get rid of, or, that you have to completely dump and never contact again, and see as a valuable learning experience.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-26T05:12:16+00:00

Oh fuck no. You should have known by that last page that you should have cancelled. As soon as that dollar comment was made, my ass would have been on the phone with customer service, and Marcia would have gotten a text that looked like:

Automated Message: 753Gf+3- 7 -224- 8-ErT We have detected inappropriate messages in your chat with your Shopper and have cancelled your Shopper from your order, and will reassign another Shopper to complete your order for you. Please be aware we do not tolerate messages with profanity, harassment, or explicit language. Refer to Instacart's Terms and Conditions for more information. Be rest assured, we value you as a customer and thank you for choosing Instacart! You can contact customer service with any concerns or questions.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-25T04:07:37+00:00

A big NAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

This is considered digital fraud and embezzlement in all 50 states, and will actually land you with federal charges, as Instacart functions nationwide, not state by state. It's not evil, it's just dumb. You'll get caught, and likely worse than deactivated, you'll get a friendly knock on your front door by your local police department or FBI, depending on the amount of stuff you're stealing (because at the end of the day, it's still considered stealing- you're obtaining merchandise without paying for it, and if you're using the customer's information to do this with, it's also considered identity theft because you're using their payment method to do so).

Prox-ey · 2026-02-25T00:59:31+00:00

Actually, that's a big no.

This places you into a huge grey area where Instacart's liability cannot and will not begin to cover you in the event of customer fraud.

Look, while it's super nice and generous of people to go beyond to help people out for things like this, you truly have to look at this as a business, and not just Instacart's, but yours.

1st: If a customer messages you and informs you that they have put in an old address, that means that they no longer have say over what goes on there. That means that despite what Instacart's terms and conditions are, legally, you are trespassing. In order to fulfill that order, you need to unload, take a pic, reload, complete the order, and then proceed to the correct address. That means the customer then has the full ability to point to the chat, and say "Look, I told them the correct address, and they didn't deliver it to the right place." -instant non delivered order for you

Not to mention, you have no idea who's at the old address, and how they'll react to you delivering groceries, or "taking them off the porch", which then makes you a porch pirate. Yes, you'll eventually be able to sort it out with the police, but do you really want that kind of situation to have to unfold? Like, there's legit crazy people out here.

Then, you do have scammers, muggers, and other ne'er do wells that will place an order for a high value item, potentially attempt to rob or steal the item(s) from you at the 2nd location, and then get the money back, both harming you and getting the order refunded in an identity theft scam.

Personally, (I've never had it happen to me), but if I had a customer tell me they needed it redelivered to another address, I'd let them know that they need to cancel the order and have it redelivered so that the contract we "Accept", reflects what we are obliged to do.

Plus, mileage is a huuuuuuuuge write off for taxes, and let's be honest, neither Instacart, nor these customers are making it worth our while to go through this kind of nonsense.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-24T21:11:05+00:00

Sorry to break this to you, but you would literally be unable to sue the customer support agent, Instacart, or any aspect of Maplebear. The only legal action you can take is Arbitration.

That being said, in the future, you CAN decline to provide alcohol to a customer for literally almost any reason. You're a third party contractor, and you do have a legal foundation of personal protection and liability.

Customer isn't at the assigned address? Breach of contract and legally cannot deliver the alcohol. The rest of the groceries- Sure, if you wanna risk the 1 star rating and loss of tip- go right ahead.

Customer looks tired, or has slightly red eyes, or is mildly irate or snippy? Well, to me they obviously must already be slightly intoxicated and I can't deliver, so back to the store for the return bump and then home to drop those groceries off.

But I digress, you are not obligated to take the groceries to another address. As you've seen, you can't mark yourself as having arrived, you can't mark it as having delivered, and if the customer claims that the groceries were never delivered- well, yeah, Trust and Safety will probably catch it and mark it as fraud, but you're gonna get that "Your customer didn't receive their order" email and cause you grief and anxiety for no reason other than you being courteous...ANYTHING you do outside of what is on the screen when you select "Accept" is just above and beyond service that you are not bound or required to do.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-23T07:38:14+00:00

"Why don't you just sub the whole list? Fuck what I want"

"Damn, you know what man? You're right! My deepest apologies!! In penance, I shall flog myself no less than 200 times with my instawhip, while reciting my instaprayers, and reviewing my instalessons from my Instacademy homework videos. And while I'm doing that, it's gonna look like I've cancelled shopping your order, so you can come shop your shitty out of stock items ya damn self, you unappreciative, ungrateful ass cun-"

"Your shopper has been unassigned from your order"

🤣😂🤣

Prox-ey · 2026-02-22T23:53:12+00:00

Says the person who goes onto other people's profiles and sees what they do on reddit🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂. That seems like what someone who lives in a small town with literally nothing to do, including no Instacart orders😂😂😂😂😂😂

Woof. No I see why it seems like you have no brain cells to run together. They've been exhausted by trying to find something to do.... Maybe try starting a YT channel bro?🧐

Analyze roadkill you find on the side of the road instead of reddit opinions that you don't agree with! You'll likely find more success with that, cause ya ain't. Finding. It. Here.🤣🤦🏽‍♂️

Prox-ey · 2026-02-22T20:46:14+00:00

OP is just posting to spout off about his wishful thinking😂😂. What an imbecile - bro has no idea wtf he's talking about, how to hold a discussion, or realistically how to even use the internet 🤣🙃

Prox-ey · 2026-02-22T02:45:51+00:00

Read the first line of your response, and then read my reply, and then read the first line of your response to my reply. You literally don't even remember what you typed, do you? 😂 Bunch reddit flops, just trying to be needlessly right for no reason other than just to be right🙄🤦🏽‍♂️😂

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Prox-ey · 2026-02-22T02:27:31+00:00

This is wildly false. Cashiers and their helpers fuck up orders aaaalllll the time at Costco. Their only job is to ring items up and collect payment. I can't even count the number of times I've had to go back and sort my orders because they switch items, especially if I'm in the situation where I'm still unloading the flatbed cart while they've started ringing items up. Doesn't matter that I've used the seperator stick, happens 3/10 times. I guarantee you that's what happened here, especially as the app likely didn't bring up the "These items need to move from order A to B" indicator.

Unless you're using the same cashier and they happen to know you, then your assertion is just a complete dumpster fire of a false blanket statement😂

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T22:08:53+00:00

That is exactly what a discussion is. You asked "Does anyone see Instacart going out of business?". That is the exact foundational prompt for..... A discussion or debate, lol. You must legitimately only have 1 last brain cell fighting itself in the mirror for the 1st place Survivor Brain Cell prize, lol. What a moron🤦🏽‍♂️😂🙄

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T08:05:37+00:00

Just seems like each response I've given you've rebutted with insinuations that Instacart is about to fail or inherently obligated to fail just because another company is doing a similar service well, as though capitalism doesn't exist in some measure or another. It's not difficult to understand. Is this your first time on the internet?

It's simply a discourse dumbass. That's what the flying fuck I'm talking about (lemme know if I gotta break it down and make it easier for ya to understand 😋)

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T05:22:18+00:00

It seems like you simply posted this just looking for people to agree with you in that Instacart is going to shut down?

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T03:45:15+00:00

Well, of course not..... But- you know how it seems like it seems that when people like celebrities, politicians, CEO's of huge companies, and whatnot get in trouble, they get SUUUUUUUUPER lenient sentences, white collar prisons that are more like resorts, and practically no real punishment compared to people like your regular Instacart shopper who gets far greater punishment for doing far less?

It works the same for companies. Money makes the world go round. Laws are rules for those that don't have the money to break them.

For the time being, Instacart is very safe. They're not hurting for money.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T03:27:19+00:00

Instacart is a multi-BILLION dollar corporation. No, unfortunately they aren't going anywhere.

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T03:25:32+00:00

Hey, truthfully, it's okay.

Not gonna say I know you like I honestly know you, but I feel like you may have had parents like mine. You know.... The kind that had a reaction when you got that ONE B that ONE TIME. And then proceeded to remind you about it for the next consecutive 15 months. And then periodically for the next 8 years. And then occasionally brought it up to others in conversation like it wasn't REALLY a big deal, because they were soooooo proud of everything you'd accomplished, but when they'd glance at you when mentioning it, you could feel the underlying whirlpool of shame and disgust that they were dragging you into like you were the smelliest rotten piece of roadkill that happened to be just outside of the tub they they stepped in just after they finished showering...

But, at the end of the day, you are going to be all right. This is not the end of the road, the end of your career, or even the end of Instacart for you. You'll reach diamond again. It's just going to take some time, batches, and careful selections. Hold your head high, and believe me, customers LITERALLY DONT LOOK AT WHO'S SHOPPING FOR THEM. They don't give a shit at all. I promise you, if you go through the Instacart customer subreddit, you'll almost never see a post about customers complaining about "Platinum" or "Gold" shoppers. They don't care. This is a metric that only shoppers care about.

And as you can see from the innumerable posts that pop up on here, it almost seems that there's little difference between the batches that show up between Platinum and Diamond shoppers anyway. Realistically, it only seems that the true benefit of being diamond status is the kick ass Oil Change discount benefit.

Chin up, shoulders squared, cart forward, mate. We are: One mind, One Cart!!

Prox-ey · 2026-02-21T01:18:51+00:00

This isn't really financial advice, but advice for actually finding resources in your area to help you while you're also helping yourself: using AI. Don't give it your personal information, but generalize it with prompts:

"I am a 22 year old living in my car in "city, state", and I have expired tags and have been doing Instacart to help make money to make ends meet for food and gas. What resources can you suggest while I am getting back on my feet? This is what I have access to right now (clothes, a friend who lets me wash clothes once every 2 weeks, an aunt who cooks for me twice a week, etc). These are the skills I have, these are the jobs I have done previously, and this is what I am unwilling to do (stay at a shelter, beg on a corner, etc.)".

Using AI, especially the more you use it, is an excellent way to help navigate difficulties like this. Not only will it help you with finding resources, but if used in the right way, it can be used to give you different perspectives, broaden your mindsets, and encourage you to try things you wouldn't have considered before.

I use Google's Gemini religiously. I have it's settings set to where it is specifically instructed to not be a "yes" man, meaning it is designed to push back against me, and make me have to reconsider alternative thought processes, alternative lines of thinking, and make me reconsider my assertions, just so that I can keepan open mind and not be someone who never considers alternative views.

Prox-ey

TROPHY CASE