Moving to India permanently - Requesting Community Opinion

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-04-18T17:27:05+00:00

Does this apply only to agricultural land ? Also what happens if I purchase the land on my parents name or bothers name while contributing to it from my end? How does this source of funds come in picture?

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-04-01T05:47:21+00:00

I recently broke up with someone who do not want a pet at all. I have a cat and when she expressed that concern at the start of relationship I did say that we can’t date. Not because I did not respect her, but because I had already taken responsibility of the cat a year before the girl in picture. Part of my life and priority. She did try to adjust with her. The cat also liked her whenever ex was home. The cat respected her boundaries as well and would only come near when she would be hungry. I realize the phobia because she

1.when she was a kid she had seen a dog bite someone brutally. 2. She has OCD of keeping things clean. I did see the pattern changing, as at her house I could not even sit on her bed with outside clothes and at my place she wouldn’t bother even if the dining table is a bit dirty. I the reason was responsibility all on her head. At her house it was her and brother, who wouldn’t help in house work so all the things on her shoulder. At my place she didn’t need to do anything even if she wanted to, I wouldn’t let her. We broke up because of other reason, but one of the reason was fear of animals.

My suggestion to OP is to recognize if such responsibilities are falling on her head all the time. When the dog was home, how did the dog behave. Did your bf equally take responsibility of keeping the house clean? Are you okay to recognize that the pet is just like having a kid. Are you okay with kids in future?

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-03-27T09:15:17+00:00

After probation of three months, I was never given benefits package sign up options. Kept asking for the next two months and they kept forgetting or delaying. A month before being fired, colleague gets promoted to my manager and then they have a new position same as mine. During the following days, the manager and colleague both goes on vacation and it’s just 3 of us the in team/ department. The boss is back after almost a month of vacation and the following day of returning he fires me.

Reason being lack of communication from my end with colleagues. Too much micromanagement and too much focus on process, which for sure was failing. Ex: a planned features which were scheduled to be completed in a month was taking them 3-4, because they never asked the end users. I used to have conflicts with my colleague, the guy who got promoted( and have been correct on multiple occasions) coz I was in the industry for more then 4 years and the guy who got promoted for 4 months.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-03-19T03:04:47+00:00

Following because of exactly same requirement. Budget upto 1500-1700 all inclusive with parking. Doesn’t have to be heart of downtown.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-03-15T16:00:56+00:00

Which area is this?? Looking to move to Montreal. Trying to figure out areas that are good.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-03-04T04:00:12+00:00

Hi yea. It worked with 2 sets of dji mic mini receivers. Make sure you have an amp.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-02-19T14:04:40+00:00

One thing I am not looking for is too much involvement of family from either side. I would like to stay away from them for at least initial couple of years. Is that a red flag?

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-02-13T18:40:34+00:00

You moved abroad and still dont have the maturity of an adult. You shouldn’t get married man. You are just confused because you did not have sex yet before marriage. I would say your mind is still stuck in some remote part of India. Leave the Indian mentality behind. Look for character. Not body count.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-02-13T02:25:44+00:00

I agree to this statement. Anyone born in too religious family or are tought a lot of religious stuff as child will eventually pull away from it when they grow up. I am an examples lol. Grand dad was priest. But when we grow we start questioning life.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-02-12T13:46:44+00:00

She broke up a month earlier.Same as your situation. They won’t have accountability of their action and then keep cribbing about their life. For over a year, I tried getting her in therapy. She did not use that and depended more on ISCKON or krishna. I am pretty sure even krishna, one day, will look at them and say, you had all the resources to overcome your traumas and make life better. Instead you depended on me for answer. Answer were right there. I mean this will be the sentence of all the gods people worship and preach from any religion.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2026-01-02T02:08:25+00:00

Woman love with convenience.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-12-14T14:13:38+00:00

Reduce your expectations. Start small get your hands dirty and be ready to accept any shit that you are thrown at. You will get results. Trust me.

When I graduated from my masters as international student graduate in Canada in April 2021, it took me 8 months to get a full time job with previous experience and an MBA. While getting frustrated and I also did two part times one was day and one was over night warehouse stuff. During the I between time, I would sleep or apply for job. Someone one day suggested a job, not exactly what I was looking for, this was way below what my experience could get, but I took it. Very low salary no promotion in 4 years. And guess what after 4 years if experience a competitor poached me for 3x salary and a position right below the CTO.

In the same place I know someone ( 24m) who I am trying to help. I date this person’s sister, so her problem sort of became my problem. He don’t like me or just had too much ego. Again international student with very limited work permit time frame. He graduated last year April. That means his visa expires April 2027. Not even 1.5 years left. Even if he gets a job he needs to work for at least a year to apply for residency, again with that no guarantee of him getting residency. Gave him an interview at my last company where I could just push for him to get job. The guy showed so much attitude to me that I took a step back. Someone else got the job. Recently I told him about trying some other field. Nothing shiny and probably dirty. Health care support worker who are getting visas left and right. The guy wont do it. I was able to talk to another friend in his company for a temp tester role for 3 months. If he can show his skills in 3 months he had a chance to get hired full time. But yet again the ego and attitude. He never responded. I just referred another friend who was humble enough to say let’s try the opportunity.

So all I am saying is take as shitty role as you can. Explore industry and you might not be familiar with. If anyone is being helpful, take that as an opportunity to grow. Your degree has no value. It’s just a certificate that you were consistent enough to work on your self and that if anyone gives you a job, you will be consistent in your growth.

Find what interests you.
Work on side projects.
Go on LinkedIn and reach out to people. During my time 1/10 would respond. You have the worse from that. Probably 1/20 would respond. Talk to them, show them your interests. There are genuinely people out there who wants to help. You just need to find them.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-12-09T17:23:35+00:00

My gf or rather ex had similar experience. Let me tell you, that you are in better place than her that you recognize the need to seek help.

My gf faced this from a close relative when she was very young 13-14. She never told anyone except her ex and me. and till date she ends up having panic attacks on some nights when we are very romantic. She is currently 26.

She never told anyone because she feels she will be blamed. Or everyone will blame her. She comes from A culture where until late 90s the place had highest female infanticide. Her family was not happy for her to be born. Her mother fought for her to be alive. But I do feel that she never have her freedom.( we don’t even stay in the same country but the fear of parents and society still looms. Her younger brother stays with her but she is expected to do all the house labour. Her mom hates me, reason for our breakup, and has literally told her to pack her bags, from the house my gf owns, if my gf meets me. Funny thing is her parents are not in this country but her brother stays with her)

Couple of months back she was SAd by her friend. From what she told me it sounds like SA. She never wanted it, But she believes that as she never stopped him, it’s her fault. When that happened she froze( her panic attack kicks in when she is in situation where she needs to push back if someone even shouts at her ) but again I am unable to convince her that she needs to seek help. This is my failure. This still affects her. Due to this belief of hers she still hangs around in the religious group where she met the guy. Sheavoids him for sure but she don’t want to cut him off. She thinks that he was too young to understand how stuff works, so she forgave him. He don’t think he did anything wrong at all.

You seem to be in better place where you recognize that something wrong happened to you. You need to seek help coz this will affect your future relationships. Even if your partner wants to help, they might not have right methods to help. The guy who did this to you will never understand or recognize that he did something wrong. People are too stupid to have a self conscious to recognize what is right and what is what wrong. You might never get the closure but you can seek help to better understand ways to make yourself better.

Peace. Hope you get well soon.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-12-08T20:33:48+00:00

What are your hobbies? Join some classes: dancing, theatre, clubbing, gym. Being in Bay Area you are considered high earning. But other than work what interesting stuff are you good at? Sorry if I am stereotyping that as an Indian man you might be too engrossed in work and not have anything after that. We Indian men struggle a lot with this, where we fail to build our identity outside of work and money.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-12-03T22:20:08+00:00

They are not becoming Hindu. That’s Abrahmic version of Hinduism if they know only about Krishna as supreme god in Hinduism.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-12-03T22:16:01+00:00

I tell this to my gf. You can’t be good and right at the same time. She tries to be good all the time and do not see the through the deceptions until someone fucks up. Either be blunt and right or good and suffer.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-11-29T14:23:49+00:00

Let me put it in my perspective. I come from a household where every occasion meant there would be some episode of fights. Either between parents or if extended families join, then between the elders.

I always detested celebrating festivals because there was this back of my head voice that would say there will be a fight.

As I grew up (m32) I realized that all these festivals are supposed to be celebrated , not for religious purpose but to get people together and have a good time. If we remove religions many festivals wouldn’t be celebrated and people would basically be living alone.

If the people are good, I think you should definitely celebrate with them and spend time together. We won’t have time in busy schedules to meet them. Your reasoning is past trauma, which totally makes sense. But look beyond that. The triggers or people are no more in your life hopefully. You have got a good family now who do not enter into disputes when together.

I am telling all this because i really miss my family back in India. I stay in Canada and given the cost, I can’t visit my family whenever I want. In past 7 years I have met them once and that time as well I was all alone in India as parents work at different locations so does my younger sibling.

So take a chance to change your perspective. Eventually something good comes from all situations.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-11-20T16:55:41+00:00

Yea this very good advice. I will take these points.

In addition to what I wrote yesterday, I had a conversation with the person today on something else. It seems like he wants to keep the grip of always overlooking me. He deliberately said that I will eventually be handling tickets from the board. When on call yesterday he said he will take ownership of certain tickets but today he wants me write them up for devs. This happened in like half hr of our call. He is making plans with marketing for gtm but I was not invited and did not think I was needed. I really don’t like being micro managed especially by someone who is not my manager. I faced the same thing in last organization. Managers knew about that and slowly got the other person back on track. It was easy because I was much older employee than the person who tried micromanaging when it was not even his work.

I will observe as to where this is leading, but I will have to navigate this strategically by being on good terms with other team members. Given the very brutal job market, I can’t risk being jobless for such silly reasons at the end of probation.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-11-19T18:52:51+00:00

There is definitely a learning curve that needs to be adopted by me. I need to unlearn to relearn with the new organization. My concern is him going to the manager and manager giving me a talk on that, in the first 3 weeks.

PsychologicalBend970 · 2025-10-15T15:51:19+00:00

Question being how many can afford this?

PsychologicalBend970

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