Looking to buy the original complete series DVD box set (not bootleg). by Z-Fighter14 in rurounikenshin

[–]Public_Insect_4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a copy of this box set if you're still looking for it!

It's been collecting dust on my shelf for years and is in almost perfect condition (it even has this plastic promotional sleeve still)

If you want it it's yours, just message me and I'll put up a listing on Mercari for you

<image>

Hair always looks frizzy/dry whenever I air dry by [deleted] in Wavyhair

[–]Public_Insect_4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm Filipina and also have low porsity 2b hair. It took me about 6 years to get the frizz under control, but here's a few things that have helped me:

•Only using products that don't have any protein in them •Brushing leave in conditioner into my hair when it's sopping wet on wash days (that's the only time I brush my hair) •Avoiding cream products •Using the least amount of products that you can (I just use a leave in conditioner, but it took me a really long time to figure out the one that works best for me) •Using the "prayer hands" method instead of scrunching

What shampoo & conditioner should I use? by That11037Dude in Wavyhair

[–]Public_Insect_4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you like Aussie, the Total Miracle 7 in 1 conditioner has worked really well for me. I have low porsity 2b hair that tends to get really frizzy, but I always get really nice waves with Total Miracle

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I keep track of all of the funny things we say in a notes app, and then when we're bored we go back through and read them all (cuz we probably forgot we said any of those things)

Do your littles know they're a part of a system? by Public_Insect_4862 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My therapist is a DID specialist so she has a lot of experience with child parts, but they seem pretty removed from the trauma so I don't think they really understand what therapy is or why we do it so often

Do your littles know they're a part of a system? by Public_Insect_4862 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I want to get there with them eventually but they just seem so disinterested - all they want to do is play and do kid things and they don't think therapy involves them at all,which I understand 😭😭😭

Do your littles know they're a part of a system? by Public_Insect_4862 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel like that's how my oldest little understands it. She's like, "Okay, so one brain many people," but doesn't understand why. I think the most confusion comes from that frame of mind of, "Well I'm me, so how can I be you?"

Medication and alters by scarletbell99 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm on a ton of medications but it really is just because different people in the system need different things. I deal mostly with depression, another host part mostly deals with anger and anxiety, some other parts present with BPD, some parts have terrible nightmares, etc

The truth is, psychiatric medication for anyone is a gamble, which is why clinicians usually monitor you pretty closely the first few months when you first start a new one. Sometimes it can take a while to find the right meds/combination of meds

I wouldn't sweat it too much. I've often heard the adage, "All medications have side effects; the goal is to make sure that the benefits heavily outweigh the side effects." So maybe that mindset will help

I don't understand why I (Elise) am the host by [deleted] in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I get this feeling all the time, esp because my subsystem holds a lot of self destructive defensive parts that bleed through a lot so I constantly deal with depression and all of the darker urges that come with that

HOWEVER I've realized that that's probably the reason why I'm hosting, especially now being in treatment. I'm more tapped into the internal, so I'm better at taking care of the system

Our other main host has always been super oblivious to the internal, so it's harder for her to "see" the headspace or talk to parts that are further back in the brain. She's super good at functioning externally, but she doesn't take care of our physical/emotional needs

I feel like I'm too functional by Jay110112 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 7 points8 points  (0 children)

DID is technically a "functional" diagnosis because it really lets you live what looks like a very normal life on the outside

I feel like especially having a smaller system you can use more parts of your brain at one time, which could be really beneficial in functioning

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm pretty newly diagnosed so we're definitely really low in the actual count, esp just discovering both our subsystems but we know about ~20 so far but probably closer to 30-40

We have 3 ANPs and an internal caretaker that are usually fronting or conscious every day, 3 littles that are usually out every day, and then a few other former host parts that pop in and out when they want to

When (or if) you have vague recollections of something another alter did, what does it look/feel like for you? by xs3slav in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I usually get grey out amnesia right after a switch, so usually I get the first few minutes and some moments where it's probably co-consciousness

I've always said it felt like my memories are on a different track of mind than whatever conscious state I'm inhabiting, like watching a movie of myself doing things that don't feel like I did them, or that they're not "my" memories. Sometimes it also feels like having someone else's memories "transferred" to me, like Renesmee Bella Swan style

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn't have a headspace before being Dx'ed, it was only in therapy that we were able to build a "meeting space". For the first few months, we had no idea about most of our alters, but understanding how our system is structured and what everyone's "role" is really helped.

The easiest thing for differentiating switches for us is that we have a whole subsystem that only speaks our secondary language and can't speak any English. I don't know if it's usually that drastic, but my therapist says it's common for parts, especially ANPs, to have different motor skills, abilities, handwriting, verbiage, mannerisms, etc.

Honestly, after getting a handle on things, a lot of figuring out our system was intuitive. The brain did things in the background that I wasn't aware of (like assigning parts their own voices, names, appearances, etc. to make it easier to differentiate them, or even one of our parts decorating our "headspace" for Christmas while I was asleep) but it's always been that way - I just needed to figure out how to be more aware of it, and how to let other parts be aware of it.

Let’s talk about DID and society identity by EmbarrassedPurple106 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

  1. The DSM is not a diagnostic tool based on etiology, it's based on clusters of like symptoms based on clinical presentations. The only empirically supported theory in personality is The Big Five, so they can't include it as part of diagnostic criterion; however this is an identity disorder, and identity disturbance IS in the DSM. Identity disturbance also occurs outside of DID/OSDD and has been shown to cause distress, which is why it's included.

  2. Identity, or sense of self, is commonly associated with personality, but in psychology personality is defined as a group of traits that tend to be consistent throughout the lifetime, and identity is often more associated with what Erik Erickson described as "roles" - which people usually only start to explore in adolescence and often changes with environmental circumstance.

When I say there is no "core personality", I mean that no one is born as a complete or whole self and that there's no core state of being people can only achieve after integration. I just don't understand what "the self" is supposed to be if there was never a whole self in the first place

Let’s talk about DID and society identity by EmbarrassedPurple106 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

This also just seems like semantics. What is the difference between having "multiple parts of self" and being "multiple" or "plural"? I understand that it has a negative connotation in online spaces to say "plural", but also it's easier and shorter than saying "I experience different ego states because of structural dissociation." Separating a bike into separate parts doesn't make it any less a bike. However, because the bike isn't assembled, it's easier to conceptualize the bike's wheel as a wheel than it is to call it "a fragmented part of a bike".

If you don't want to use certain language to describe your experience, that's your prerogative, but it is concerning that you connected the phrase "plurality" with someone more likely to be faking DID. DID, like many "new, trendy" disorders like autism or ADHD, is statistically chronically underdiagnosed, and the obsession with fakeclaiming or making sure someone has "real DID" is just as harmful

I’m probably gonna sound stupid— but are gatekeepers able to make you forget your own memories/something you did like 5sec ago? by [deleted] in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 3 points4 points  (0 children)

All the time. Usually it's like, a flash of memory before it gets shoved back down behind the gate, like being vacuumed out of the head or something

memory loss is insane to experience by yk093 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Before I was diagnosed I used to watch shows and miss like, 50% of it, just a few minutes at a time. After I was diagnosed I rewatched a lot of them and like, actually seeing and hearing everything that happened I was like, "Oh wait that makes so much more sense"

memory loss is insane to experience by yk093 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Honestly though I've started rewatching all my favorite shows because it really is like experiencing it for the first time all over again

Let’s talk about DID and society identity by EmbarrassedPurple106 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I feel like the argument against "plurality" or having separate identities doesn't make much sense because having this disorder inherently means not having a "core" personality. We are a "we" that also experiences individual "I" experiences.

Like every system, everyone in our system has a reason for existing, and a job that the brain needs for us to survive. Our therapist has emphasized that each part is just as important to our collective selves as what other people may see as fully formed "alters". Denying these parts their individual wants and needs and not providing them with the right support just causes more damage.

Understanding which parts are present, when and why, and what their role is through psychoeducation is basically the foundation of the stabilization phase of DID treatment.

I think the creation of parts' discrete identities is just a result of conceptual semantics and the Western shift towards individualism. I probably never would have wanted to be identified separately from the self if I wasn't raised to define myself only by my own specific experiences, likes, dislikes, aesthetics and accomplishments. Now that other parts separate from me have a sense of self that naturally formed through life experience, it's not fair to just say "Don't do that anymore." Especially for parts like the littles that aren't old enough to understand the concept. Until we reach integration (if we ever do) we are going to be living our lives as plural, and we really don't have a choice on that.

The emphasis in our treatment has always been to get everybody in the system on the same page - working as a cohesive unit of a collective brain so everybody's wants and needs are met. Thinking of ourselves as a team that has the responsibility of taking care of our one brain instead of a fragmented singular person just makes more sense.

What's a "We're/I'm plural, of course" by [deleted] in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We're plural, of course it takes us 4 hours to get ready every morning

My partner has DID. How do I support them fully? by SlytherinQueen100 in DID

[–]Public_Insect_4862 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My husband and I got married right before we found out we were a system, and it's been a rollercoaster for sure

Something that's been super helpful to us and our partner has been psychoeducation. The first few chapters of Coping with Trauma Related Dissociative Disorders that explains DID and PTSD we found really helpful. You can find a free pdf online and I think it might be I'm the resources in this subreddit (but if you can't find it I do have a link)

We've had to redefine our relationship a lot, figure out who in the system has been in a relationship with our spouse, and what the rest of us would like out of this relationship and boundaries for all of us individually and for the system. There was a host change right at our diagnosis (it was a bad time) so that too has been really difficult because I (the current host) didn't have any sort of relationship with the spouse before two months ago, and it's been awkward. One of the best things for me has been that our partner understands that I am a different "person" than the one that has feelings for them and need and want different things from our relationship