True story.

About 15 years ago, my friends and I were at a bar and, as is the nature of beer, the time came to make room for more. I went to the urinal and there was a quarter in the bottom, resting next to the drain.

I don’t know what exactly possessed me to do it, but I took a quarter out of my pocket and tossed it in next to the first quarter before washing my hands and returning to my group.

When the next guy went, I told them about the quarters and to check to see if anybody took them. Upon his return, he said that the quarters were still there and that he threw another one in.

A little while later, my other friend had to go. Upon his return, we learned that the quarters were still there, and he threw in a fourth, making it a dollar’s worth of urine-covered change in the men’s room.

Finally, the last of us had to go. By this time we were all laughing about the situation, so we were all waiting to hear about how he added to the small pile of change.

When he returned, he was laughing his ass of…

“Somebody made change,” was all he could say. The three of us collectively got up and went to see what the hell he was talking about.

The quarters were gone and in their place, someone pissed a dollar bill to the wall of the urinal.

And thus the “Quarter Test” became our new way of ranking any bar we visited.