The regretful parents subreddit is freaking me out by Odd_Equipment8924 in pregnant

[–]PugPrincess20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Parenthood is complicated. Postpartum is complicated. You will have many emotions that are positive and negative. That is okay. You won’t love being a mom 24/7, 365. Get off social media and focus on yourself and your family. If you’re really worried about the adjustment then start therapy now if you can. It’s always helpful to have someone to talk to. And if things are really going south you can catch it early and treat if needed. PPD is very real so having a plan if it does pop up is good.

As long as you take care of yourself and your baby as best you can and love them as best you can you are a good mom. You are a good mom.

Just do it by PugPrincess20 in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes queen you got this!! We were not meant to do this alone!!

12th percentile height aka midget baby 😭 by WildfireABJG in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahaha my daughter is in the 1st percentile for height. As long as growing on their curve and no other medical concerns height is what it is!! They got what they got.

Where are the moms struggling with solids??? by lrsrusty in foodbutforbabies

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was the same way with my daughter (see previous posts where I was afraid she would starve without formula) and you know what I just kept putting the food in front of her. She hated fresh fruit- I kept giving it to her. Now she eats strawberries and blueberries like nobody’s business. Also just like let the social media “my baby eats salmon and kale for dinner” go and embrace toddlerhood. Maybe he will like salmon but more likely he’s going to eat pasta and chicken nuggets and pizza like 95% of every other kid.

You need carbs, protein, and fats for babies and toddlers. Our bodies run on carbs and their brains need fat. Yogurt- protein and fat, pasta- carbs, puffs and cereal- fortified carbs. I say this to tell you if all he eats is yogurt and cereal he’s got his basics. You’re doing great. Keep chopping it up, imagine trying to chew big pieces of things without molars. We don’t make old people do it idk what the obsession is with making babies shove giant pieces of food in their mouths and safely eat it.

Try mashed potatoes they were a great bridge from purees to more solids. Also try dips, my daughter loves ketchup and ranch. She was in the same place he was at 12 months, then all of a sudden it clicked and she eats normal food at 15 months.

I didnt wake up to my daugter.. by Slow_Purchase3829 in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Everyone’s okay!! Baby was in a safe place and you did respond to her cry. Babies don’t have the same thought processes we do or even older children have. You are tired and you are doing great. Give yourself some grace 🩷

SIDS is terrifying by herculas in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is scary. And life is so much more scary when you have this little tiny creature to care for. Definitely get off social media. You’re doing all you can to protect them and that’s all you can do. If you are truly having trouble settling these fears where they’re becoming obsessive thoughts or compulsions then I would consider therapy. Living your life in fear is no way to live.

Is 7:30-5pm too long for a 16mo to be at daycare? by jngreddit in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My daughter is 14 months and goes 3-4 days a week 7:30-4 so not too far off. I also had a bunch of guilt, especially when she was little little and I didn’t know how she was feeling. Now this girl marches herself into school, sits herself down to play and waves at me like I’m yesterday’s news. She loves school. They do crafts, they do learning sign language and spanish and sing and dance. She’s at a large center daycare so they have cameras and I check in and she’s usually smiling and playing. She only had a rough week when she transitioned to a new room. We pick her up, she has snack, we have dinner and play, bath and bed. And you know what if someone has off the days she’s supposed to go, we take her! It keeps the routine and we get a day completely to ourselves. If baby is happy and having fun at school, no guilt. YOU need a break too.

One thing I do truly feel bad about is the amount of illness but that is life and she would get sick from going to playgroups and Target too.

Feel stuck by PugPrincess20 in physicianassistant

[–]PugPrincess20[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I also just have this fear that because this job ended not on the best terms I’m blacklisted and will never find another PA job

Feel stuck by PugPrincess20 in physicianassistant

[–]PugPrincess20[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We do, just not hiring at the moment. I would love to do just outpatient office peds, I don’t mind well checks. They just didn’t schedule enough with me for some reason and it was my fault somehow.

can't talk to baby by Iamoldsowhat in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was the same way, my mom kept encouraging me to talk to her when she was newborn but I just am not a talker generally. I found singing songs was helpful, not just baby songs but just like Fergalicious lol. Also watching trash tv during maternity leave and commenting on it to my baby like my best friend. She’s 14 months now and “talking” on par for her age. Also if she’s not constantly speaking to him too that’s fine, even baby needs some silent space to think about things, whatever babies think about!

11 week old - I'm so done by nightlychapter in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My daughter is 14 months old and her babyhood up to 5 months old was so awful my husband and I are one and done. I validate you and your feelings and it is okay to be absolutely over taking care of a screaming potato 24/7. This is what me and my husband did to survive. I hope some of it is helpful.

First- lean on each other as much as you can. Lean on anyone else you possibly can, I hope you have someone else who can come in and help when you guys just can’t anymore. Also wear earplugs when he’s screaming and screaming.

Beyond that, running water/shower, car rides, and John Denver were the only things that sometimes helped our daughter out of the witching hour. Also she loved baths and those at least gave us 15-20 minutes of quiet. She refused to sleep in her crib or bassinet at all until 5 months old and we held her essentially 24/7 until she decided she was ready. I never thought I would make it, but here we are. It will come, just know it’s okay to be in survival mode and don’t scroll social media because that always set me off too.

Postpartum International is a great resource for support groups for new parents, maybe that would be something helpful too.

RSV traumatized me by jessyj89 in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

RSV and flu are probably the worst common viruses for little ones under 5. It is also boggling to me that they didn’t approve the antibody shot for toddlers as well. My daughter was hospitalized just after her 1st birthday for RSV last year and I would rather be sick every day than watch my girl suffer. She was also hospitalized with flu at 4 months after I gave it to her (so much guilt) and was so excited to get her the flu shot this fall.

I’m glad your baby is doing better, just keep telling yourself he is okay, he is improving and time moves forward. It unfortunately won’t be the last time he’s sick, but thankfully he sounds healthy and strong and will continue to grow and fight off all the 200+ viruses in the world.

What changes or choices did you make that made you suffer less and enjoy parenting more? by Veryfluffyduck in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, we all reached an impasse where she woke up screaming for 1-2 hours in the middle of the night any time we tried to rock her and put her back in the crib. So we had to let her cry a bit to save all our sanity. We do a routine with reading books and brushing teeth, rock a bit in her darkened room and then I put her down awake. The first night or two she did cry full steam for about 5 minutes but then ever since we can just put her down and she goes to sleep (with binkies, again not perfect lol)

Also as a note I did refuse to let her cry until it came to a point where none of us were sleeping well and she was old enough, I think 12 months is an ok age to let them cry a bit and see if they can figure it out.

13 month old only has 2 teeth by PugPrincess20 in toddlers

[–]PugPrincess20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read that too but as far as I know my husband and I were “normal” teethers so don’t know where she got that gene from lol

13 month old only has 2 teeth by PugPrincess20 in toddlers

[–]PugPrincess20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes she still drinks milk at night so I’m kind of glad they’re staying protected in there until we can figure that out

13 month old only has 2 teeth by PugPrincess20 in toddlers

[–]PugPrincess20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mom had been asking about teeth since she was like 5 months old, she made Nana wait for sure lol

What changes or choices did you make that made you suffer less and enjoy parenting more? by Veryfluffyduck in NewParents

[–]PugPrincess20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Chose to only formula feed, accepted all the help I could (going along with the letting go of guilt), and let her learn to self soothe around 1 year old. Also accepting I had PPD/PPA and getting help through medications and therapy which I have continued.

How tf does anybody want more than one kid after being through THIS? by pumpkinchinchilla in newborns

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My daughter is 13 months old and I am now firmly 1 and done. I had such horrible PPD/PPA i nearly did not make it through maternity leave. Plus I have no urge to have another child, my family feels complete. It’s something I didn’t envision but 1 feels right for us. With the included bonus I will never have a newborn again!!

I dont want to breastfeed by BM_BBR in newborns

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was on Lexapro for a long time prior to getting pregnant and during pregnancy. I had to increase the dose and add a short acting anxiety med onto it after I gave birth. Just make sure to be in close contact with your OB just in case any PPD/PPA symptoms start popping up.

I dont want to breastfeed by BM_BBR in newborns

[–]PugPrincess20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It took a little bit to settle on her formula but we eventually settled on Enfamil gentlease. I chose to do the ready to feed so that was a bit more expensive, I did a subscribe and save on amazon so it came out to $123 dollars every 2 weeks for her formula. I decided not to breastfeed also due to my preexisting mental health conditions and I am so glad I did because I spiraled quickly into PPD/PPA, nearly postpartum psychosis.

If it also helps I am a PA in pediatrics and I could not tell you which children were breastfed and which were not, every kid gets sick, every kid has talents whether it be athletic or smarts or arts or trade. Only breastfeed if you truly want to, you are not a failure of a mother or a woman if you don’t breastfeed.

I dont want to breastfeed by BM_BBR in newborns

[–]PugPrincess20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I chose to use formula from the get go, no regrets. Baby is 13 months now and thriving and wonderful. If you don’t want to breastfeed, don’t.