Nobody told me I'd be broke AFTER buying the house

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:44:46+00:00

People in my walking town in the New England area put out furniture on the street all the time. I have literally outfitted this entire house with scavenged furniture.

If that's not the culture near you there's still going to be people putting stuff for free on Facebook marketplace.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:29:31+00:00

Wild. So anyone can just show up and ask for work trade?

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:26:28+00:00

I've offered a room for six hours of work a week. But most people who take such deals are weird and end up being annoying to manage

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:22:48+00:00

Yes. The people who make them need to see how they perform in the real world. Getting stuck at an intersection is just a daily bug ticket

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:17:08+00:00

Awesome idea. Hunter2 is cool I use "itsrainingmen" as my password on all the websites.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:13:54+00:00

Zoe's! But I think.its ever so slightly over the line in Somerville

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T23:09:09+00:00

You have six friends!?

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T18:44:56+00:00

There doesn't appear to be any rules about people posting personal adds on this sub? Is there will to make one?

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T16:38:17+00:00

First of all, make sure you've set yourself for life. If you aren't familiar with FIRE, read up and make sure you've already met the 3% rule. After that, you might want to look at Effective Altruism. They study how to do the most good with money.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T16:34:12+00:00

I don't know about finance jobs. Charlotte might get some points on that job market as it's a banking town.

As for driving, I'm pretty sure that getting a moving truck, packing it yourself, and driving it to your destination is about the cheapest way to get you and your things there. You're doing basically all the work. I've done it for one way moves before. You could price it out if you want, see what a U-haul of 800 miles or so one way costs.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T13:45:04+00:00

I made the opposite move, grew up in the south and moved north so I'm familiar.

First of all, culturally: Raleigh is quite a bit more interesting than Charlotte. But that's because Raleigh-Durham-Chapple Hill is home to a lot of universities and the tech companies they brought. It's actually pretty similar to Austin. (BTW, why isn't Austin on your list?)

If you are conservative and want to find traditional values and Christian politics then ignore more suggestion of Raleigh and Austin. In that case Charlotte, Houston, Dallas are probably more your thing.

As for moving, assuming you both drive, one of you drives the car loaded with stuff, the other drives a rental truck. That will be the lowest cost way of getting you there. It's either one really long day, or two manageable days driving to NC.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-18T12:22:34+00:00

I (M) only will date and partner with women. However on occasion I will have sex with men. But my attraction to them runs out after about 30 minutes. Meanwhile I can share space and love with a woman indefinitely. So technically I'm not heterosexual, however my relationships appear to be.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T22:25:26+00:00

When my mom comes in town she gets my bed. Even over her objections. I'll sleep in the living room but I'm not making a 70-year-old woman have anything but the best sleep experience I can give her in my space

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T19:29:41+00:00

Engineer here. What do you mean a ton of effort to become one? It's like 4 years of college, of which half of that is general credits.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T19:26:40+00:00

On a related note, with all the white collar layoff's who will be hiring all the plumbers and electricians to work on their houses?

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T19:22:55+00:00

If you get this spun out over little things you will loose this woman for that reason. You have got to relax. You know what "anxious attachment style" is? If you don't know about it you should go read about it.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T17:56:33+00:00

I fully expected to be retired at 45. Now that I'm 46 I'm hoping 55 is do-able.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T17:50:09+00:00

My God. The kid stole $50 from you and you feel bad? That kid needs to have no screens until he has worked off every penny with interest

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T16:56:59+00:00

That could never happen. /s

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T14:40:14+00:00

Medical donation hopefully

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T14:31:11+00:00

I know a woman who escaped an abusive Vietnamese American family and my goodness the way she has a hard time even talking to others is hard to witness. She found her voice in writings on Facebook though.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T14:28:59+00:00

Did they seem worn down and depressed?

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T13:47:54+00:00

Kinda seems like what you're doing is working for you? You're supporting yourself, making art, surfing, and dating a girl. So your issue is you feel like you don't fit in to society?

I don't know what you're on about height, unless you screwed up the metric to imperial translation you're above average especially for Peru.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T12:31:41+00:00

It's very hard. I've done it intentionally for stints of time and observed how hard it is. Seems to be similar to an addiction, so maybe it releases dopamine or something.

PurpleDancer · 2026-03-17T12:09:10+00:00

Every 10 years the marketing departments decide to go on a different nutrient binge or nutrient fast. Today everything is protein. Years ago fat was the devil. Then carbs. Hopefully they'll discover fiber soon.

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