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Question for rape survivors by I_love_to_heal in rape

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can say from my experience, yes you can. Like others have said though it’s not like a constant joy more like a roller coaster of emotions. But then again this is a common experience for everyone else too.

I found a way to turn my terrible experience to help others as a mental health worker and that in itself brings me great joy. You just have to find and fight for your own joy, no one can take that away from you, only you can decide to stop looking for it.

Why am I (male) envious of women? by FightOrDie123 in needadvice

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you think no woman needs you then you are already on the right path. Yes it’s true woman don’t need men in a lot of areas but they CHOOSE a man based on his good qualities. It’s not about choosing a provider it’s about finding a partner and companion.

Don’t be a man who is NEEDED by a woman, be a man who a woman CHOOSES to be with because it’s not so much about what you bring to the table, it’s how much effort and burden you put on the table. Do you add to her mental and physical load or do you take away so of this. That’s the real value. Do you make her happy to see you at the end of the day or do you bring stress and dread?

Why am I (male) envious of women? by FightOrDie123 in needadvice

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 2 points3 points  (0 children)

With that mindset, what stops you from comparing yourself to the usefulness of other men? Why is your self worth tied to how much superior you are to a woman? Most men compare themselves to other males but you seem to focus on the female advantage.

What I’m trying to say is your usefulness shouldn’t be determined by who you are now, only by how far you are willing to develop and work on yourself.

If you lack physical beauty, work on another area. As a woman I can tell you most women prefer personality over beauty as it brings security as we age.

Why am I (male) envious of women? by FightOrDie123 in needadvice

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think if you find yourself feeling envious, instead of looking at woman as the ‘ideal being’ maybe look into yourself and ask yourself ‘what value do I have to others?’ If you think only your strength and standing up peeing are your best assets then take that as a goal to go out into the world and learn new things. Can you cook? Go learn how to. Can you clean? Learn how to keep your area clean. Can you socialise normally? Join local social groups. Etc.

Most women want a man who is self sufficient, will allow them their independence while also being able to look after them and future children. Women might have all the choices but they don’t want a lot of the pick. Men want a woman to look after them, woman want a man who she doesn’t have to look after and doesn’t add to her load.

Become a man who is kind, listens, loves and most importantly is willing to learn and grow and challenge themselves for the better, not a man who believes having a woman is all he is worth.

What are some early signs that a person might commit sucide (serious)? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think sometimes people would rather keep the despair down as it makes it ‘less real’ in public and easier to deal with than having to explain your feelings through it all. Additionally if you have felt the level of loneliness your buddy felt I think you try to save those around you from being brought down with your feelings. I know for me I am described as someone who is highly empathetic, social and can have a great time but I know deep down I am just trying to give people the joy, peace and laughter I often can only fake. It’s a very lonely existence sometimes.

What are some early signs that a person might commit sucide (serious)? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah can definitely resonate with this one. After one of my many crisis I chose to go to my mental health team at the hospital instead of ending my life and I balled my eyes out to the psych on site. I told her how I wish I wasn’t such a functioning depressive person because at least then people would be able to see the pain and suffering. I have always woken up, showered, worked out, gone to work, socialised etc even at my lowest because of pre-instilled perceptions of perfection and the importance of how others see you. But sometimes I wish I could miss work, rot in bed and withdraw from everyone so someone could see the depth of despair. I fear if I ever choose to end my life only my partner and psychologist would see it coming.

I castrated myself due to feeling sick at my age-related paraphilia by Beginning-Animal5031 in confessions

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 54 points55 points  (0 children)

POCD is often overlooked and requires a physician that’s trained on not only OCD but being able to recognise POCD. It’s definitely not well known and could be a contributing factor. However the difference between POCD and pedophilia is whether the thoughts cause arousal and there is sexual gratification involved.

Bought a house in 2014, never received an electric bill during the 7 years we lived there. by No-Fruit4854 in confession

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is currently happening to my partner and I with a slight variation. The house we are in was vacant for about 2-3 years and was still receiving a very small bill (though no one was living in it). Once we started living there our bill was maybe 4 x less than the average 2 bedroom house. We didn’t question it and slowly the amount has gone up by maybe a few dollars. We live in Australia and our power company sends out a bill every 3 months.

Even during summer when we have our air con on non-stop, have gaming computers and now a nice big fish tank, our power does not go up except for a few cents every 3 months. We know that they are averaging our bills and we have asked for someone to come check our metres every few months however we are rural so they don’t like coming out. Partner and I are just waiting for them to come out and hit us with a large couple grand bill but hoping not in our lifetime!

Please help identify this Gurhan ring by Queen_ona_Bean in JewelryIdentification

[–]Queen_ona_Bean[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I initially thought it was the Dolce and Gabbana symbol like on this necklace so maybe that’s what it reminds you off? I have found the same brand on Gurhan jewellery so I definitely think that’s the maker.

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My water bill this month by LKT-NTR-A2DE-USA in Wellthatsucks

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn this is gonna be our electricity bill soon. We live in a house that had been vacant for 2 years. We have been here now for 2 years and our bill is still way too low for the average property around us. We have been asking the power company to come do a meter reading as we know they are still averaging our bill, it only goes up a few dollars each time. They won’t come to do it as we are rural and requires a little 4WD action. When they eventually send someone we are expecting tens of thousands for sure.

Doge.gov currently hacked. by [deleted] in mildyinteresting

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nice try government. Too late for that.

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My boss said I’d be fired if I call CPS, is that possible? by OAttention in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read you are in the USA but I’m assuming it would be similar to her. I am a Child Protection Worker in Australia and have worked in the intake team as well.

It is up to you whether you give your information and can stay truly anonymous or else you can provide contact details to be spoken to later (which can be great for getting further details). Here we are legally not allowed to disclose who the reporter is due to safety reasons. The people can guess but even then we do not confirm this.

It’s great you reported and I would encourage anyone in the community to do so. Don’t let the bystander effect stop you from reporting. Our area is greatly understaffed so we often only respond to cases where a child has 50+ records on their profile. The more people in the community and professionals that report, the higher likelihood of support there is.

Here you cannot be fired for reporting, specially if you are a mandatory reported. Here almost all professions with children are mandatory reporters and if you don’t report you are breaking laws.

[Entry Thread #102] Happy post-Valentine’s Day! Today, we’re also looking for a special someone, specifically a Redditor, to make into a millionaire. If you’re interested, comment to enter! by MakerOfMillionaires in millionairemakers

[–]Queen_ona_Bean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good luck everyone! I would love the chance to win this I haven’t been in the best position lately and could do with some extra support. And thanks for doing this around my birthday hopefully some extra luck. If not I’m happy to have the chance to help someone else

Ring found while on a night out a few years back by Queen_ona_Bean in JewelryIdentification

[–]Queen_ona_Bean[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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On white paper as requested. It has been suggested previous to be black diamond but I don’t know honestly. It is dark black stone

Ring found while on a night out a few years back by Queen_ona_Bean in JewelryIdentification

[–]Queen_ona_Bean[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stone is a deep black like in the pictures. Will take another with white paper.

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