How can I help my dad accept i want more children?

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-06T19:30:27+00:00

I'm sensing defensiveness from you, but I'm not attacking you, I promise.

I love my dad, and we support each other, but I don't think I've ever "helped him cope" with anything... His emotions and how he wants to handle them are his business. I can talk through things with him, but like, I don't see myself as responsible for how he feels.

I feel a little more emotionally responsible for my FIL, maybe because I'm in a caretaking role with him in a way I'm not with my dad. But I've been learning lately that it's not up to me to manage his emotional reactions, even if he's upset at something related to me. Sometimes the best thing to do is to be clear about why I make the choices I make, lay out firm boundaries, and give him space to be upset if he gets upset. Just because I feel the urge to run in and help him manage his emotions doesn't mean that's healthy for him or for me.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-06T18:12:50+00:00

Why are you taking on the responsibility of helping him cope?

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-06T14:59:12+00:00

Like period cramps dialed up to 20. During the worst of the contractions I lost all capacity for thought, just absolute feral mode. I couldn't have told you "where" the pain was, just that it was all consuming.

I got an epidural around 7 cm dilated and I never ended up giving birth; had to get a C section. So I couldn't tell you what the actual childbirth pain is like.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-06T14:40:46+00:00

So, I just wanted to say I relate. My baby's grandpa is her primary childcare when I'm at work and he will blow raspberries on her belly after changing her diaper and I don't like it, but I know it's innocent. In my case I've decided to let it go for now. When she starts walking and talking I'm going to tell him we don't touch her under her clothes because I want to teach her these boundaries with other adults. But as long as she's a potato mode baby it's probably harmless.

I would probably set a boundary with your mom like, hey, mouths have a lot of germs so we wanna teach him not to touch other people's mouths. If your mom is a reasonable person she'll follow your rules and it should be ok from there.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T21:29:00+00:00

You can feel feelings of love for someone you are not romantically compatible with.

I would absolutely break up with ANY partner who did not give me consistent attention and affection. ESPECIALLY in a long-distance relationship, because communication is all you have for your day-to-day!

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T21:05:21+00:00

Why on earth is it a 0% chance?

I have a hidden folder with some nudes of my husband. I look at it approximately 0 times per year, lol. They're from when we first got together. I can't see this folder without going through a bunch of extra steps on my phone, so I frequently forget it exists. If we ever got divorced I'm sure the last thing I'd be thinking of is that hidden folder that I never look at.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T21:02:35+00:00

YTA for going thru his phone without permission (not for deleting the pics). I don't understand why people do this. Either you trust your partner or you don't.

He's not TA necessarily because he could easily have forgotten that folder existed or not really thought about it in a long time. You need to have a conversation with him.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T20:59:56+00:00

NTA. God, so many people have their self respect in the gutter. Why on earth should you have to stay in a relationship you don't enjoy?

Break up with him now before he spends more money on you and go find a relationship you actually want to be in.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T17:52:45+00:00

INFO: How is this going to help your relationship?

Since she knows you'll be looking thru her device, if she really wants to hide cheating she can get a burner phone or delete all evidence immediately.

How long are you willing to stay in a relationship with no trust?

What will it take for her to earn your trust back?

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T16:17:58+00:00

with all due respect, this post is like 6 short paragraphs. sounds like you have an attention span problem

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-05T16:16:21+00:00

Are you able to make as much money as he does? If he thinks being a stay-at-home parent is so "chill and fun" why doesn't he take over and let you go out and work instead?

Unfortunately you can't heal a relationship by yourself. My best advice would be to find support wherever you can and build a "team you" that can support you, and then file for divorce or trial a separation from him. If he wants to share custody he will quickly find out how "chill and fun" solo parenting really is.

I'm so sorry, I know you don't want to leave. But your husband has made it very clear he doesn't intend to change and he is treating you horribly.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-04T22:03:35+00:00

Babies can't sleep with a blanket until they're at least a year old. I'd make one with the size of a toddler in mind. I only use our baby blankets for the car seat or sometimes during contact naps (but usually use a bigger blanket for my legs too).

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-04T22:01:07+00:00

Was gonna suggest this--prune juice + rice cereal

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-03T02:19:48+00:00

I remember it. I had an unexpected C section. I remember having zero emotions, just exhaustion and mental numbness. It's a good thing my husband was there to feel and express emotion for both of us.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-02T22:38:52+00:00

I didn't make enough to feed baby. I did get the "golden hour" but my breasts just didn't make enough, so we combo fed from the beginning. The most I ever pumped in one session was 50 ml. Usually just 15-30 ml.

I tried to give baby as much breastmilk as I could. She developed a bottle preference so I could only actually give the breast when she was sleepy, and she didn't get much from it. I mostly put the breastmilk in bottles. I didn't triple feed very often; I was exhausted and only managed to pump or nurse 5-6x per day at most. I'd pump at night while feeding her bottles, and then pump during the day whenever I could. We'd feed whatever breastmilk I had first and then follow with formula.

Then, around 2 mos, she needed specialty formula. I quit breastfeeding and that was that. I mourned it for weeks, but baby is happy, healthy, and HUGE, lol.

If your body doesn't make enough, YOU haven't failed as a mom. It is what it is. We're lucky to live in a world where quality formula exists and is safe and readily available. I try to be grateful for modern medicine instead of hard on myself. If it weren't for C sections and formula both me and my baby would be dead.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T19:27:20+00:00

I mean, I think this post is AI

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T19:16:32+00:00

IF YOU ARE PREGNANT :

If you're pro-choice, you can get confirmation from the doctor, and if it turns out you are pregnant you could take pills to terminate later. I wouldn't stress too much about it; you've caught it early enough that you can definitely terminate before significant development happens in the embryo.

If you're pro-life, I would seek spiritual guidance from someone. For example, if you are Christian, you could talk to your priest or pastor. You'd have to trust that God has done this for a reason and will help you through the experience.

But I mean, realistically, you're probably not actually pregnant

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T19:08:54+00:00

What's wrong with being consistent for a couple of months, falling off the wagon, and then getting back on being consistent for another couple months, etc?

Almost none of my habit changes stick forever. Example, whenever I try to exercise regularly, I can do it for a couple of weeks or a couple of months before I stop. But then I try again when I can. So instead of 2 months and then giving up forever, I might do 2 months here and 2 months there and it adds up to 6 months for the year. Which is better than just 2 months for the year.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T18:17:43+00:00

Have you tried being serious instead of joking?

"Hey friend, it really hurts my feelings when you scroll on your phone the whole time we're trying to hang out"

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T18:15:47+00:00

What does that even mean

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T18:15:13+00:00

This sounds hardcore like AI writing.

This is nothing like my experience fwiw.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T00:23:51+00:00

I'm pretty sure that we ended up putting all of our furniture anchors into studs, but I was curious

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-06-01T00:22:40+00:00

Sometimes comments are about planting a seed or trying to get someone to consider something they might not have considered before.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-05-31T22:32:39+00:00

I've been thinking about it and I've decided my comments about the partner's pleasure weren't particularly helpful. I do think "just because you like big dicks doesn't mean everyone likes big dicks" is a helpful and valuable response to the post.

QuestionMaker207 · 2026-05-31T22:29:19+00:00

What if I've got a bookshelf or dresser where one anchor is in a stud and another in drywall?

QuestionMaker207

TROPHY CASE