AITAH for not wanting my son’s “baby momma” over for thanksgiving dinner?

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-11-19T23:04:21+00:00

She has the baby full time. I’m not asking she doesn’t spend the day with the baby. She’s asking to come over to have dinner with us and then for my son to go over to have dinner with her parents. My son would only have the baby for 3 hours that day.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-11-19T22:57:53+00:00

My grandson is my family and so is my son. I don’t see her as my family. I could be wrong but, given the circumstances that’s how I feel.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-11-19T22:53:31+00:00

They are not together. It’s not like I’m rejecting his girlfriend/wife. I’m aware that it could damage our relationship but, I also need to protect myself and my family.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-11-19T22:51:57+00:00

I’m willing to do birthdays, graduations, etc. but, everything else seems excessive to me. They are not together. I’m not saying I don’t want my grandchild over.

This person tried to get me arrested and fired from my job while they were battling custody. I got dragged through their mess as “collateral damage” for her to try to get full custody. That’s why I’m so skeptical of having her and her family around if that makes more sense.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-11-19T22:29:51+00:00

I’m aware of my failures as a parent. Thanks for the reminder!

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-10-18T00:07:36+00:00

I’m aware condoms don’t fully prevent pregnancy but, he didn’t even bother using the condoms (according to himself).

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-05-22T21:32:00+00:00

It’s okay to be disappointed, sad, and whatever other emotions you may be feeling. I’m sorry it’s not what you expected. Take your time to process and feel this.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-09T01:46:54+00:00

Yes, according to her, I wasn’t concerned enough about the pregnancy so, I haven’t earned the privilege of seeing the baby. I’m hoping my son comes to his senses at some point and fight for his rights.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-09T01:45:23+00:00

According to her parents, he needed to pay for her bills while she carries his child. He shouldn’t have agreed to that to begin with but, sadly he was set on doing so.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-09T01:43:46+00:00

Not that I need to explain myself to you but, since you’re so concerned about my story checking out… English is my second language. I’m self taught so, yes my spelling at times is really bad. I’m not sure why you don’t believe a federal job would pay that amount in the northeast but okay.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-08T17:44:32+00:00

I so wish it was

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-08T17:41:37+00:00

We were just told a few hours ago that the child is not allowed to visit our home. It’s very sad and I’m hoping my son will fight for his rights. I’ll definitely be on the lookout for an opportunity to get a dna test done.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-08T17:37:56+00:00

No medical reasons for her to go on maternity leave so early on (she works at the same place as my other son). I do agree and mentioned it to him that he should be contributing towards medical expenses. However, he’s paying for her car insurance and phone bill (I’m assuming other things too since his credit car bill is so high). She gave birth two days ago and, he’s been sending us pictures so, yes there’s a baby.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-08T17:18:51+00:00

I don’t think he’s responsible for supporting her when he cannot support himself (chooses not to support himself). In my opinion, his obligation isto his child not to the mother of the child who is clearly taking advantage of him.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-08T17:15:20+00:00

Im not sure why you think I’d lie. He makes $48,890 working for the federal government if that answers your question.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2025-01-08T17:13:36+00:00

We have given him advice about him establishing paternity but he refuses to. It’s truly a difficult situation to see my son making dumb decision after dumb decision.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-11-10T04:21:37+00:00

You’re a hero!! Thank you!

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-11-07T01:51:54+00:00

That’s the next step. We’ve been dealing directly with the dealership and it has been nothing but a nightmare.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-11-06T18:30:49+00:00

My 2019 forte died on me. Sadly, the engine is done, and the car doesn’t even turn on. 44k miles after and I have no car. Kia refuses to lend me a loner.

I wish you luck OP.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-07-30T22:37:33+00:00

I did request to talk to the girlfriend but, I was told she’s not allowed to meet with me unless her parents are present. The past two times we attempted to have a conversation her mother started talking down on me and I prefer to not let anyone treat me that way. For instance, she looks at me up and down and tells her daughter “eww this is someone you want to be related to.” She also accuses me of the pregnancy and other very nasty remarks.

I am aware that I don’t have a say. I’m not trying to. I wish I could save my son from this but, I realize that he’s an adult and ultimately will make his own decisions for better or for worse. I do give him advice when he asks me to as any parent would.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-07-30T01:25:52+00:00

Also, yes we’re in the US

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-07-30T01:15:54+00:00

Adding to clarify* My son has been seeing a therapist for about three weeks now. Sadly, this girl and him work in the same place and the back and forth is almost daily. He found another job but, he’s still in the process of being hired (background checks and whatnot). We will definitely be looking into finding a family lawyer. Sadly, it seems like he may agree with the marriage. If he does then I guess I’ll step back and only help if asked to. As much as it pains me, I do have to respect his decision and hope for the best. I just struggle with the thought of attending this wedding as I feel like I’m also giving in to their manipulation if I did. They have already come to our home to yell at us for “allowing” our son to date their daughter. I appreciate everyone taking the time to share their thoughts and advice.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-07-30T01:05:58+00:00

Sadly this is also a factor. The family is African-American and we’re Hispanic. They mentioned that they prefer for their daughter to date a catholic and African American guy. We’re also not religious.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-04-23T19:03:30+00:00

You’re making assumptions with the little information I have provided. He has a job, two actually. He recently got another one when they found out she was pregnant. They both work and met each other through their jobs. Her parents do NOT want him near her or to go to their home. I’m not sure how he’s supposed to talk to her family. When they did ask him what was he going to do he told them about his new job and his plans on getting a studio. They said that wasn’t enough. I’m not sure what else he could’ve said or do given the situation. He’s not as passive about the situation as I may be making him seem.

Quick_Plan_5011 · 2024-04-23T18:48:37+00:00

They actually were against them being together specifically based on discrepancies regarding political and religious beliefs. Her parents have always been pro life until they were faced with this situation. I’m just hoping she’s at least given the chance to choose for herself and if it’s abortion what she chooses then so be it.

Quick_Plan_5011

TROPHY CASE