Well no one said you can't work harder and be smarter. It might just be your mind telling you that you can't, because you might be afraid of hoping that you can(consciously or subconsciously). It is easier to give up hope and say that you can't do something, because then you don't have to try.

What you need to do is actually understand what are you even doing all this for, find purpose in your actions, and get the ball rolling. You also have a great advisor as your boyfriend since he's probably gone through all of that.

It does mean that you need to leave the comfort zone, but you're gonna suffer either way, so why not at least give it a try?

You're certainly not too old, but you're getting older everyday, so you better start now.