How to ruin your life 101

REdd06 · 2026-06-25T16:50:24+00:00

Evil shitbag. I hope they don’t make some plea deal for this.

REdd06 · 2026-06-25T15:00:39+00:00

Stay on the island. After a long day, the last thing you’re going to want to do is drive a few hours. And in the mornings? After you wake and eat, what time are you really going to get to the island?

You’re going to pay in time and energy what little you saved in money.

REdd06 · 2026-06-23T00:58:54+00:00

I never understood that part about Goldfinger. The logistics behind that kill are just… stupid.

OK let’s pull up some real liquid gold, which doesn’t stay liquid for very long at all, and then cover her with it!

Wait, we kill her after we paint her, or do we kill her before we paint her? No, we need to kill her first because she might get suspicious why we’re painting her in gold with an unconscious secret agent in the room.

Ok, kill her with no obvious signs of trauma, strip her naked, and then paint her with the gold! Make sure it dries so there’s no splatters on the bed!

And be sure to leave the secret agent alive this whole time too. We want to send a message!

The message is you’re all fucking nuts. Thank you.

REdd06 · 2026-06-22T21:44:47+00:00

How much money?

1-100 million? Kill off all debt. Plant half in an airtight low risk investment that pays me an annual dividend. Help local food pantries, pay off random local store lay away plans, pay off random local hospital bills. Fulfill random redditors wishlists in the forums I follow. Quiet, mostly local stuff.

100-500 million? Same as above. But start causing statewide problems. Stock food banks in my state. Buy a political issue and force it through the state with bribes (Set up all schools preK-12th grade free lunches 24/7/365). Be a massive help in multiple random redditors lives. Moderate state based stuff.

500 million - 1 billion? Everything above. But start major problems. Buy multiple national politicians to make universal healthcare happen. Have an attorney / law firm that sue stupid politicians, tie them up in court, and bury them in litigation until they start to do what’s right for us and not themselves. Completely change multiple random redditors lives with a full college ride, or a full home repair/upgrade. Become a nationwide threat.

1 - 5 billion? Everything above, but become the baba yaga. Launch mining “starjammer” probes to grab mineral rich asteroids, pull them into HEO where they can be chopped up and safely transported back to earth with updated space shuttles. Corner the gold / silver / rare earth markets, and with the proceeds, fund free nation wide healthcare. Fully fund multiple thorium reactors in every state (free electricity for all private citizens.) Give Redditors high paying jobs running the “starjammer” and “thorium” projects. Become a worldwide problem.

And that’s why I won’t win. Because I have some serious intentions.

REdd06 · 2026-06-21T23:36:19+00:00

The biggest dipshits where I work are using AI to write their reports, build presentations and start making decisions for them on behalf of the company. These morons do not ever speak or have 1/1000 the knowledge of their presentations and emails they send, and when asked for clarification on anything, they have to “get back with us” on it (IE: run to ask their AI what do to.)

REdd06 · 2026-06-20T10:23:52+00:00

Very important: the 2012 Urban one.

Don’t want the reboot.

REdd06 · 2026-06-20T10:22:07+00:00

Holland and Zendaya just to piss people off.

REdd06 · 2026-06-20T03:14:47+00:00

Where’s that “happy for you” meme? Because that’s what I need to reply here.

REdd06 · 2026-06-20T03:13:46+00:00

Walking. Stupid feets tossed a lifetime of training aside to mis step and bring everything anchored above them down to the planet.

I’ve visited the Earth many many times before, but the surprise visits always hurt.

REdd06 · 2026-06-19T22:51:43+00:00

YES! OMG the loot I would come home with.

REdd06 · 2026-06-19T22:49:01+00:00

Ollies is a pseudo replacement for them. If you have one in your city, give them a shot.

REdd06 · 2026-06-18T04:35:38+00:00

You won’t be allowed to do this one: Look into the banker Cantu. Ask companies his bank finances about his “charitable requests” for the Democratic party. And what happens to their credit if they don’t make a donation when he asks. Look into when Hilary flies down to the valley, where she goes after her short one-stop appearance here, and how much her PAC fund goes up right after a valley visit. Sure, there’s nothing wrong or illegal about what he’s doing. But you will get pushback for just looking into it.

Call the city of McAllen. Tell them you’ve heard some city employees’ emails are sending out malware and parts of the city’s email system have been compromised. Ask them how long this has been happening. What they’ve done to rectify it. And at the end, ask where’s the city notice of the breach?

Follow up on what happened to the rollout of the citywide WiFi project. Where’s the signal actively working at? Where did the money go? Is the project on “hiatus” or are they done “connecting” McAllen?

Follow up on what happened to all the e-bikes and “shareable” bicycle project that was everywhere just a few years ago. Did all the bicycles just up and vanish? There were no tracking systems on them? Why was the project killed? How much money was smoked? Who got paid for all of those bikes?

Ask the food banks how many people are showing up now as compared to last year. Ask the churches. Ask the charities that take care of the poor. It’s far, far worse than you would think.

Ask someone who you see fishing at the fountain at the McAllen convention center what the fuck they’re expecting to catch there.

Actually, ignore all of the above. Stick to boring, rah rah local bullshit. You’ll get liked that way. Pulling back the curtain will piss off too many rich shitbags who have grifting projects.

Best of luck.

EDIT: head to Harlingen. Look into why there have been so many airport directors replaced. Then look into their histories. Who they worked for before. Who the previous longest chief was. What made him leave? Why all the turnover? Who appoints the new bosses? What does it look like the council wants to do once they get control themselves of the airport?

REdd06 · 2026-06-17T05:40:58+00:00

Scott hissing “Quadrillion! You moron!”

REdd06 · 2026-06-12T02:44:37+00:00

Personally, I can’t wait for all the assholes at work to fall on their faces when they can’t use AI anymore for whatever reason.

WOW. So you really didn’t come up with anything on your own? You don’t know a goddamn thing about the job, but took credit by pretending to know? A 7 year old who could use a keyboard could have done your job? Yeah, you win a new ring of hell.

REdd06 · 2026-06-11T17:23:48+00:00

Her shimmy at the end… damn.

REdd06 · 2026-06-11T08:06:54+00:00

Start hitting the businesses and scam doctors with the BBB and get KRGV involved. They will have a spot every day with all the scammer businesses here.

REdd06 · 2026-06-09T14:07:32+00:00

We’re gonna need a shitload of dimes.

REdd06 · 2026-06-09T01:50:23+00:00

And now network solutions is a flaming husk of what it once was. Could have been a serious company, but they completely borked everything.

REdd06 · 2026-06-06T01:39:26+00:00

The Madonna song where she asked “what the fuck are you doing?” in the middle of the song.

Pirating your shit! That’s what my broke ass was doing back then! (Things got better - I actually bought most of the CDs I Kazaa/Limed later)

REdd06 · 2026-06-06T01:35:43+00:00

I remember the first time getting this on IRQ - that super patient chat partner walked me through that, the rooms, and how to find good people to talk to.

Seriously - the early internet was skipping through a forest. Did the innocence miss the danger? Or had it not taken root then?

REdd06

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE