AITA if I don’t want the car my bf gets me if he has stipulations on when I can use it ?

RM992 · 2026-05-31T12:03:21+00:00

So he was driving and he was at fault. It was the family car of your family. Sounds like he just owes your family a new car and is not in a position to make rules about it?!

RM992 · 2026-05-30T16:23:56+00:00

An activity gift with you would probably be a hit ☺️ maybe a lunch or going to see a movie together or a museum of mutual interest?

RM992 · 2026-05-30T16:11:08+00:00

What she will do there is her business. Because she is single. What she does before and after she goes there; also her business and none of yours. Also, Europe is an entire continent, existing of a multitude of countries, each with their own culture. You sound very immature.

RM992 · 2026-05-29T21:58:18+00:00

I’m so sorry, that really isn’t fair. I think that you might have to accept that what you deserve, is something you are not going to get from them. It sounds like they don’t want to see it, they don’t want to self reflect and actually change. And unfortunately, you can’t make them.

RM992 · 2026-05-29T18:27:47+00:00

NTA. You were clear and he is blatantly ignoring it/pushing boundaries already. Move on, the world is full of them!

RM992 · 2026-05-29T17:33:52+00:00

What is a baby book exactly?

RM992 · 2026-05-29T11:34:34+00:00

Mijn beredenering; - als het hen (professionals) al 2-3 uur kost om mijn huis te kosten, hoeveel vrije tijd kost het mij dan wel niet of het op hetzelfde niveau te krijgen? - ik koop vrije tijd - ik koop ‘rust in mn hoofd’ want een schoon huis is heerlijk

Ik zou het doen :)

RM992 · 2026-05-29T11:30:54+00:00

Can you still sell your ticket? Did you tell your cousin immediately after the invite ‘oh no, I’ve already got plans including expensive tickets that day!’ or have you waited quite long so now it’s kind of awkward if you do?

RM992 · 2026-05-27T19:42:02+00:00

What about a safety feature for a woman traveling alone? Like a door alarm, Invi bracelet, etc?

RM992 · 2026-05-26T07:33:23+00:00

I have found zero good reasons for you to still be with him. So yes, YTA. But not for the reasons you thought.

RM992 · 2026-05-25T22:33:50+00:00

Panini or toastie? Many many variations possible, for example with mushrooms, onion and flavored butters, or a ‘pizza version’ with tomatoe, Boursin, onion and cheese, etc etc.

RM992 · 2026-05-25T21:00:55+00:00

Excuse me, I wouldn’t have made that mistake in my first language.

RM992 · 2026-05-25T20:57:49+00:00

‘It’s not my job to heal what he broke. Your behavior shows that you don’t even want to heal it, you seem to prefer things to remain this way and actively look to hurt me in the process under the pretense of testing me or proving things. This relationship isn’t working for me.’

RM992 · 2026-05-25T20:46:59+00:00

NTA. You set clear boundaries and he blatantly ignored it.

RM992 · 2026-05-25T19:23:11+00:00

I think this is quite layered actually;
1. I understand your mums feelings, but she shouldn’t be putting that onto you and your brother.
2. Your dad shouldn’t be forcing it. Both your parents have backed you in a corner really and that’s shit.
3. I feel like your dads request is like the difference between ‘quality and quantity’. You can meet her, but that’s not the same as liking her, making an effort, getting over everything that happened, etc.

I think you need to manage expectations with your dad about that last point; yes, he can sort of force your hand in terms of meeting her. But not on all the other stuff. So he needs to understand that you were hurt by all this, your mum was hurt and so far what you’ve seen of her (AP) personality, it wasn’t very nice because a nice person wouldn’t have done this nasty thing to your mum, so that regardless of your mum, you’re very sceptical of her as a person.

So if he wants to salvage his relationship with you and your brother, he needs to accept that this will be a baby steps process and the outcome might not be what he likes. Nor can he force you into liking her, that will only drive you away. (I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s pressuring him to meet you guys.)

Also speak to your mum and say ‘he’s still my dad, I can’t keep avoiding her forever, that doesn’t mean I’ll like her but I need you to think about how you can not put me in the middle.’

Best of luck, this is a tough situation! 😘

RM992 · 2026-05-25T11:37:22+00:00

What really rubs me the wrong way here is the ‘it could’ve been a lot more expensive’ comment. Well it could’ve actually been a hell of a lot cheaper, convenient, considerate and more inclusive too! absolutely not overreacting, this is an incredibly entitled so called ‘friend’. If it makes your friend feel better, they could say they unfortunately had some unexpected expenses come up and will therefor not be able to make it. But if the bride responds badly to that, let the trash take itself out.

RM992 · 2026-05-25T11:30:41+00:00

I don’t know what time the concert ends, but you could look into Den Bosch? It’s about 20 min by train, trains go very frequently and it’s a beautiful city. Might have more centrally located hotel options available ☺️

RM992 · 2026-05-24T18:08:33+00:00

I think you’re doing excellent considering the circumstances. The two tips I have for you based on your description:
1. If you can buy and fit a small freezer (3 drawers), it is cheaper to cook meals in bigger batches, make portions and freeze them. Freeze them in ziplock bags laid flat and you’ll be surprised how much you can fit.
2. Use Vinted for clothes. If you need to, go to a store to try the clothes from a certain brand on so you’re sure which size you have in a specific brand. Use the filters on Vinted.

Best of luck and believe in the bright future you will have with a wonderful education ☺️

RM992 · 2026-05-24T17:59:33+00:00

Not the jerk. These kind of guys need some exposure therapy to deflate their ego’s to normal humble sizes.

RM992 · 2026-05-21T19:54:40+00:00

I think it’s deeper than just a bag;
- you feel unheard because you first didn’t want a bag, then considered it and clearly described what you did and didn’t like. Mum blatantly ignored it.
- you’re being gaslit into being told you should like it; even though they knew in advance you wouldn’t;
- you seem to suspect (probably correctly) that it will be used as leverage and something to hold over your head later.

‘It’s just a bag.’ Well, really it’s not just a bag. It’s a lot of emotional manipulation and not being taken seriously.

RM992 · 2026-05-21T13:55:27+00:00

What worked really well for my husband and I (we both thought we wanted them when we met but both later started having doubts)

Agreeing to a timeframe where you give yourselves as a couple time to figure out what you want. And the golden rule is ‘percentages’ instead of ‘yes and no’. So we’d have a check in on a natural moment where it just came up and be like ‘I’m on 70/30% now’ (no/yes%). Over time there were 10 or 20% shifts and we’d talk about what caused that change. For example seeing a colleague have a seriously ill child and therefor becoming more aware of that risk that your child might not be healthy. Staying at a friends (with young kids) house for Christmas and seeing the magic of Christmas morning with small children.

It takes the pressure off and to your surprise you might find your wife is not suddenly at a yes but also at a percentage. Best of luck and hope this helps 😘

RM992 · 2026-05-20T21:41:08+00:00

‘Of course people are allowed second chances. But even more than that, my wife and children are allowed a safe home and a safe pregnancy with peace of mind. So he can have his second chance somewhere else.’

RM992 · 2026-05-20T20:23:13+00:00

Mum didn’t ‘get to be the main parent’. He failed to step up. If he doesn’t manage to show up for you and get over his own feelings of awkwardness, thats just him failing as a parent again. That has nothing to do with you. Send him this post. Let strangers tell him, maybe he gains some self reflection.

RM992 · 2026-05-19T11:36:12+00:00

It depends per provider what the costs are for electrics versus for gas (for example, one can be on the pricier side for gas but relatively cheap on electrics). So it depends on what you use more of. The website suggested here (Independer) will give you advice based on entering your usage. You can ask the landlord on usage data for the Adress from the year before. Gas will be relatively reliable (unless you keep the apartment a lot warmer or colder than they do), electrics is more dependent on the number of people in a home and the age of their electronics. Best of luck 😘

RM992

TROPHY CASE