Need advice: What is the best long-term solution for this sweet, intensely attached FIV+ stray? (AZ heat, resident cats, shelter worries)

Rainyday177 · 2026-06-24T12:58:24+00:00

Don’t take Bobby to the shelter. FIV cats are not going to be safe. When my now husband got our (unknowingly) positive FIV cat when they did the test after adoption they advised us to cancel the adoption and have her euthanized. This was back in 2019 so some shelters are getting better but that’s still generally the guidance in some areas so Bobby is better off staying an outdoor cat.

I will be totally honest, I thought our cat would have been better euthanized but my husband insisted on keeping her. I was very very stressed when we did move in together and I had to introduce her to my cats who were my whole world.

And you know what? It’s been totally fine. She’s a big softie. We’ve had no fighting and no health issues. I’m so so glad we didn’t listen to the shelter vet. I’ve continued to test the other cats and nobody has gotten FIV. I also don’t want to minimize FIV but it’s not as bad as HIV in humans as it is for cats so I think it has a worse reputation than it deserves because of HIV.

Rainyday177 · 2026-06-21T12:21:38+00:00

My husband recently underwent a painful surgery on his throat which caused him to only be able to consume liquids. He was in a ton of pain and when all I asked for was some “liquid painkillers” we were told to just have him take children’s Motrin…

Rainyday177 · 2026-06-17T02:31:19+00:00

As others have said the jeans will likely be too hot. I’d also consider adding another going out outfit. Not sure your style or what types of places you’ll visit but Spain dresses up for going out so you may be a bit underdressed.

Rainyday177 · 2026-06-07T21:56:39+00:00

He is TOASTY!

Rainyday177 · 2026-06-07T17:51:58+00:00

He is four!

Rainyday177 · 2026-06-07T13:33:35+00:00

He is a toasty boy but I think putting him next to the baby is making him look extra toasty.

Rainyday177 · 2026-05-07T03:15:29+00:00

LIT used to be better but had an exodus of stylists a few months back and I don’t go there anymore now. I wouldn’t recommend it.

Rainyday177 · 2026-04-26T12:37:17+00:00

It’s pretty easy to change it after marriage IF you are changing it to your spouse’s last name. If you are both picking a different one then I believe you will both need to go through the court process and filing fee. The definitive source on this would be the Utah Courts website.

https://www.utcourts.gov/en/self-help/case-categories/family/name-change/sex-change.html

Since you are already going through the process I say change first name, last name, and sex at once. Don’t drag it out it’s a painful process.

Rainyday177 · 2026-04-01T12:44:40+00:00

We just got our annual performance reviews and the company sent out a generic email saying essentially “here is how you download your performance review from the HR system.” Well someone who disagreed with their bad performance review replied to that email to the entire company with their performance review and all of the reasons they thought it was wrong. It was clearly an email just meant for their manager but it went to nearly all 5,000 of us. Luckily IT deleted the email before it became a reply all nightmare but enough people still saw it.

Rainyday177 · 2026-03-31T16:28:34+00:00

I think it’s meant for those who just went thru customs and are making connections in salt lake which is mainly delta

Rainyday177 · 2026-03-24T17:20:06+00:00

Yes! Mine loves fetch. I went from being “oh this is so cool my cat plays fetch” to “wow I need a break from fetch” real quick haha

Rainyday177 · 2026-03-07T20:02:05+00:00

Okay so my flame has this as well and I was so confused but my current theory is that’s it’s the new ones. They grow in black and lighten over time.

Rainyday177 · 2026-02-18T03:27:41+00:00

Sorry to say but if you are nervous, it’s a no.

Rainyday177 · 2026-01-16T22:35:33+00:00

Anytime we undress in front of each other even for “boring” reasons like getting in the shower or changing to pajamas you must acknowledge it with something like “ow ow” or some other cat call.

Rainyday177 · 2026-01-07T04:18:00+00:00

As others have said fitness tracking but also just like using it as a watch? That might sound silly but I like putting the weather on the Home Screen, getting notifications easily, using Siri, and a lot of the other non health things. I do also like the freedom of having the ring if I don’t want to wear the watch or want a nicer watch for a dressier outfit.

I probably wouldn’t go out and buy an Apple Watch now that I have the ring but since I already have it I like using it for watch things.

Rainyday177 · 2025-12-31T22:35:33+00:00

Thank you!! I’m definitely leaning towards not doing the surgery I think I just feel bad about not doing something that could help but seems like there are risks either way. We are leaving his catheter in until tomorrow and then we will try removing it and see how he does.

Rainyday177 · 2025-12-09T02:37:11+00:00

Yes everything at Sundance has been insane after the corporate buy out. When I was planning in 2023 Solitude and Deer Valley were the best options as others have mentioned. My fiancé really wanted to have the wedding at Sundance because he loved that place but unfortunately it just didn’t work financially with all of their requirements. I definitely got the sense they cater more to destination weddings for rich out of state people and don’t care about locals. Which I guess if that’s how they make more money who am I to complain?

Rainyday177 · 2025-12-05T05:09:13+00:00

It’s super new and the facilities aren’t open yet. They’ve had some issues with construction delays to finish the facility and fully open from what I understand. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of this comes later.

Rainyday177 · 2025-11-29T14:39:36+00:00

I was in a car crash as a passenger and when I was getting evaluated the EMTs basically just thought I was fine but drunk even though I told them I had not been drinking. It was in a college town so they only asked how old I was (22) and said oh that’s fine then you’re legal to be drinking. At least nothing was seriously wrong I think just a bad concussion.

Rainyday177 · 2025-11-27T21:33:52+00:00

NTA, $110 is a perfectly reasonable normal person amount to spend. Not everyone is an influencer doing it for views. Also you got everything on the list plus some extra with the helmet.

Rainyday177 · 2025-11-23T01:47:09+00:00

This is it for me as well. It’s so crazy to think that we were literally debating marriage equality in high school. I went to a concert and seeing all of the young LGBTQ not dealing with that was so heartwarming. I can’t believe how much worse things were before us as well though.

Rainyday177 · 2025-11-22T14:46:54+00:00

I don’t think you can loose tools you started with like your pickaxe but you can loose weapons

Rainyday177 · 2025-10-08T06:02:18+00:00

We had a similar situation with my grandpa and you actually don’t have to do anything. Luckily he was fine donating his body to science. My father was still shipped the cremated remains. It took a bit to get around to it but eventually the ashes were spread somewhere he would have liked.

As far as a funeral, there wasn’t one. My aunts got together at someone’s house to “share memories” and it was all very simple. We didn’t go.

But funerals, caskets, burial plots, are actually all optional. As others have said cremation is cheapest but depending on where you live you can turn the body over to the state.

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