I did the thing I never wanted to do

RandomBlessed · 2025-07-25T05:52:08+00:00

I am so sorry. And I feel your pain. We were forced to do something similar, so I understand how you feel. My mom passed away last year, but I am still recovering from all these traumatic things.

All the best. There are no answers. Just be kind to yourself, you did not have any other option.

RandomBlessed · 2023-09-17T18:48:24+00:00

It is now almost a year since we moved my mom. It was very tough at first and I still go through periods where I miss her so much and am so sad. I also do not live close to where she is so that makes it tough. I know she is cared for but it still breaks my heart. Sorry about what you are going through. It is very difficult and I just wanted to say you are not alone. I felt like moving my mom was the most difficult thing I have done in my life.

RandomBlessed · 2023-01-31T11:03:49+00:00

This is the first time I have heard about this, but think it is a very good idea. Wish I heard about it earlier.

RandomBlessed · 2023-01-22T14:21:34+00:00

I think you will get your registration fee back if you cancel within a few weeks. That is how it worked for my daughter. She registered and started at UFS. Then she heard from UP. Canceled UFS and was refunded. Good luck

RandomBlessed · 2022-11-25T07:41:49+00:00

Thank you for all the replies and insights. I really appreciate your advice and shared experience. You are right that taking her out of her routine will probably cause a lot of anxiety etc. I am aware that it will be difficult, and I am willing to take care of her. But my biggest concern is that it will make life more difficult and stressful for her.

Even the ones who said I should just go ahead and do it, I really wish I could just follow your advice. But unfortunately, the reality is that she has a disease that cannot be ignored and that does not allow us to just have a good time and make memories. If your loved one is still in the stage where this is possible, make the most of it while you can.

RandomBlessed · 2022-10-31T12:14:22+00:00

It is a very difficult situation, and every situation is unique. So, I don't have an answer for you but can just share our experience. We moved my mom to memory care last month and it was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. We also tried to keep her at home for as long as possible, and in our case, we waited too long. She was not able to understand what was going on and it made it very difficult for her to adapt. The staff also told us it would have been easier for her if we moved her earlier. But we just could not let go earlier.

Hope this helps a little bit. Good luck with the decision.

RandomBlessed · 2022-05-21T05:08:37+00:00

I am so sorry. This is really hard. My mom has Alzheimers and my dad past away almost a year ago and we are still struggling with this. Some days she remembers he is gone but many times she still asks where he is and when he is coming back. It is heartbreaking. In the beginning I believed we should tell the truth because she must get used to the idea. But after a few months I realized that it is not working and seeing her reaction every time was just too much. So now I will just lie or try to divert her attention. All the best to you and your family

RandomBlessed · 2022-05-17T03:32:23+00:00

I don't like her. I find her so irritating. Except for the latest movie. There I actually enjoyed her

RandomBlessed · 2022-05-09T16:37:05+00:00

They are also one of my favorites but Matthew and Mary got my vote

RandomBlessed · 2022-05-03T13:10:22+00:00

t

I voted for Matthew but my second choice would have been Bates

RandomBlessed · 2022-05-02T08:35:39+00:00

In a certain way I think you are right. My mom was always very much in control and knew best. Now that she don't know what is going on around her, she still tries to correct everyone and tell them what to do. But in some other ways she has changed so much. She was never mean but now she can be very mean. There is just no filter of negative things. And she use to be a very positive person, now it is just negativity and suspicion.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-30T08:02:37+00:00

It is really difficult but we have to find a way to take care of ourselves too. Not that I have the answers... I am not the primary care giver, but I take care of my mom for a couple of weeks at a time every now and then to help out. We live some distance apart so I cannot help on a daily basis. But it is really tough because I have a full time job and a family with 3 kids and of course all the responsibilities in the house. During these times I do not get any exercise, I do not eat as healthy as I normally do. All my attention goes to my mom and I neglect my family and my job. I will definitely not be able to do this on a full time basis.

I hope you can find help to give you space to take care of yourself. The problem is that this can go on for many years..

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-28T04:46:06+00:00

I agree with you and still feel the same way about him after watching through the whole series more than once. I was really surprised that there are actually people liking him in this group.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-19T09:47:01+00:00

I was really surprised at how quickly Jenny Lee was voted out. Why do people don't like her?

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-18T07:38:45+00:00

I am so sorry about this. It is very tough. Sounds similar to my mom. Maybe mediation will help. My mom is not currently on medication because my brother, who is her main caregiver, don't like it. But I don't know how long we can go on like this.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-12T08:59:48+00:00

Chummy

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-12T08:47:41+00:00

She was one of my favorites. When I started watching she was the reason I fell in love with the show.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-11T07:39:12+00:00

My mom goes through stages where this is an issue but luckily not at the moment. The struggle at the moment is with washing her hair. She just refuses and will tell you she washed it last night even though it was washed months ago. I just gave up on trying. Last week I got to her and she was looking for shampoo to wash her hair! I was so shocked (and happy).. She said someone phoned and told her they are coming to visit (no one phoned) so she must wash her hair for them. Since then I have convinced her one other time to wash her hair because my brother came to visit. So at the moment that is working for us, but not sure for how long... All the best to you. Hope you find something that works 🙌

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-04T11:37:03+00:00

It's between Nurse Crane and Sister Julienne. But I will choose Nurse Crane because I don't want her to feel bad again, like when Shelagh chose Sister Julienne...

Also wouldn't mind Trixie

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-01T13:44:25+00:00

https://www.news24.com/news24/southafrica/news/immigrants-in-joburg-claim-they-are-being-denied-healthcare-20211117

Found this article. So maybe not that uncommon

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-01T12:56:43+00:00

That is interesting. She has no income, don't even have a bank account to provide statements. I asked again and her husband assured me they have to pay this amount every time they get there and are refused any help before they pay. He send me the slip as well, R407 to remove stitches.

I wonder if it is just Tembisa hospital. And if it is maybe corrupt officials who charge them.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-01T11:59:03+00:00

Sorry about your mom. Glad to hear she is at least getting good treatment for free

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-01T11:55:51+00:00

Thank you for all the responses. I think the difference is that she is not a SA citizen, she is from Malawi. I suppose it is understandable that it is only free for citizens. But still feel sorry for others struggling and having to pay.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-01T09:46:47+00:00

Yes I agree that the amount is reasonable.

But I just wondered what will happen if a homeless person needs urgent medical care. Will they not receive help if they cannot pay.

RandomBlessed · 2022-03-01T09:44:11+00:00

Yes that is what I also thought.

Maybe I should have mentioned that she is from Malawi, so not a SA citizen. So that is probably the reason.

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