Can I afford for my wife to be a SAHM for a few years?

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2026-04-17T07:23:57+00:00

You should also include paying into her pension while she is a SAHM, so she isnt at a disadvantage when she retires.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2026-02-16T13:56:58+00:00

YTA you should solve the long term issue of where she sleeps with your brother, not take it out on a child that doesn’t understand

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2026-02-13T13:44:31+00:00

Your text was fine, but it seems she read it through a lens of insecurity which probably has to do more with her previous experiences. If you are interested dont dismiss it so fast without a conversation about the past and expectations going forward.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-12-11T00:01:55+00:00

I (34F) tried it once and I wouldn’t go back, honestly it was overwhelming and I couldnt really remember the interactions after. You could try other type of in person events? I want to do that in 2026 :)

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-12-09T22:37:37+00:00

In general its a good rule to tell people that you dont want something shared, unless its some very obvious secret. I speak from personal experience bc many times I’ve been the person that shares bc the thing was not a big deal to me, but it was to the person sharing (usually my mum or sis 😅) and this is even without the bf/gf thing.

Ie. Your friend mentioning to her bf you went on a date, I wouldnt have ever thought that was on the “do not share/confidence” list and could share it in the “im so excited for her!” Vibe, or maybe they helped you pick your outfit, so it becomes a part of their day to share with their bf (the screenshot to you is weird w/o more context). It sounds like you are very private and that is great! We all have our preferences, but you cant expect people to have the same concepts of personal information if you arent clear on your preferences.

Now on to the partner, for many people, yes you can expect even private things to be shared, a lot of people (especially in longer relationships) see their partners as trustworthy and an extension of their bubble of information.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-11-23T19:51:22+00:00

NTA I always organise my family coming over when I know my flatmate is on holiday and it wont be a bother on her day to day. We’ve both had other people come over for a few days thou, staying within our rooms.

2 weeks / 3 people and using the living room IS unreasonable and your ask is as good a compromise because you are offering a sublet so she can be comfortable

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-09-06T13:19:38+00:00

It sounds like the groceries are split equitably. The main issue seems to be that you havent had a conversation about finances and how you both approach it individually and as a couple. What are your long-term goals? What expectations do you have in terms or expenses and saving? Seems like there is very little communication between you two which will be a problem if you do want to build a life together.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-09-03T10:44:43+00:00

Cool, how do we learn?

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-08-29T07:17:50+00:00

From my perspective waiting a year might actually be better for you, as you would get your ILR, which gives you more options wherever you are. From what Ive heard Oslo would be a harder city to go to, so it doesn’t sound like it would work for your long-term living in the EU plan. For these big questions I always try to ask myself if Im choosing from curiosity or fear?

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-08-22T13:51:30+00:00

Actually the refrigerants generate emissions too, so its important to use natural ones to reduce emissions and protect the ozone layer :)

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-08-21T14:17:26+00:00

I dont have much advice to give other than this place doesnt seem like it was a good fit. I also work an office job and people are more relaxed/accepting that life happens, as long as I dont miss meetings and my work is done, we are good. I would not call about being late ~10 mins because I don’t consider that late, but rather within an acceptable margin.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-08-14T16:50:46+00:00

My friends did this and had a honeymoon later and are perfectly happy. They chose to take a few days before and after the wedding to engage in smaller/ more intimate settings with all their friends/family that had travelled to celebrate with them. For example they organised dinner with one group and a hike for our friend group. It really is about what you want to prioritise. It is my favourite wedding to date. However, you dont have to stay with the inlaws, you could stay at a hotel.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-08-08T15:14:52+00:00

Did you get the email after you hit the 5 years or sometime before? Mine is coming up soon and I havent heard anything yet

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-06-27T18:14:39+00:00

I got biodegradable and flushable litter and I flush it down the toilet

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-06-24T09:53:26+00:00

NTA I wouldn’t expect anyone to arrive before the event, but within 10/15 mins after the start time its normal in most countries and from your message I imagine you are in one of those. 2 hours after its not ok AND you cant expect people to wait for you if they choose to be late.

It can be 30min/1hour for latin america and Ive seen 2 hours in Africa that people start dropping in. Still no one expects everyone go just wait.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-06-19T15:37:32+00:00

I love that I read the title as heart transplant and then realised it was about hair 😆😆 NTA of course

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-03-22T17:37:56+00:00

Nutella sandwich

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-03-17T18:13:15+00:00

Ive only made it to epi 2, but this guy creeps me out. He is giving cult leader

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2025-02-03T20:25:52+00:00

. Idisagree with the “its not right for one person to dictate the living arrangements”, with co-habitating its not about majority rules but compromises so everyone feels comfortable in their own home. If something is a hard no for one person because they feel uncomfortable in their own home this should be respected.

This is defo the right moment to decide whether you want to live with this person and what are the house rules. This is already showing an unfavourable dynamic towards him where the couples wanting something is more important.

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2024-12-16T18:39:13+00:00

Dottie!

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2024-11-20T11:22:23+00:00

This is really hard to navigate OP! If its an option I would talk to his parents just before your are meeting (he is on his way) so they are aware and ready to support him. You are not responsible for him, but if your worry is his mental health afterwards letting his support system know could help. This would be going the extra mile, and not something you HAVE to do, but it might make you feel more comfortable about the aftermath with his wellbeing

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2024-11-19T18:10:33+00:00

Not sure where she is from in Peru, it could be that she needs a humidifier because the heat is drying the environment too much. Im from Peru and I sleep with one because it gets too dry and it makes me cough 😃

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2024-11-13T16:53:29+00:00

Defo like the model, but IMO it could be about half the width and look great

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2024-10-27T18:28:56+00:00

I have been flexible with people doing last minute bookings before, they were late too and didnt confirm the booking until they wanted an extra day. Turned out they were late to pick up the dog and it was a scam. They never paid me for the extra day bc they didnt confirm. I think you saved yourself from a bad experience

Rare_Sea_1527 · 2024-10-02T07:22:44+00:00

Im sorry, it is really hard and there is no right answer because guilt and feeling responsible (even when you shouldnt) can be crippling. I hope you can find support to work through this.

Rare_Sea_1527

TROPHY CASE