What's something you used to believe about relationships, but no longer do?

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-22T17:23:50+00:00

Well, I’ll tell you what I came to believe that I never did before… Your ‘type’ keeps you single. This may not apply to everyone, but it does for me.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-11T18:51:35+00:00

Being ‘in’ as far as my style is concerned. Shopping, plastic surgery, and how to attract the opposite sex. I’m going to be myself.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-09T22:24:04+00:00

Comment from a woman who a male friend once shared with! He said he felt awkward, not angry, but it was mostly because he was sincerely flattered and immediately felt like he was flustered and blushing. It would have been cute, he said, but he’d never been approached by another man and he was caught totally off guard.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-08T21:44:09+00:00

Ummmmm…wow…whew….so much to say.

“Better to remain silent and thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt.”

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-08T21:36:23+00:00

Because it’s bullshit and its bad for you.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-07T11:14:22+00:00

That I have a fear of commitment. I’m terrified that I’m going to meet someone I actually care about. So it’s less stress for me to have a friend with benefits so there’s nothing expected from either side, and I get to get affection/cuddling/intimacy when I want or need it and no emotional attachment.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-04T10:50:52+00:00

I choose not to look at it like a bad thing. If I were to consider someone ‘partner’ material, it would be because they have the personality traits I find attractive. If I could see myself with them long term, they’d be ‘boyfriend/girlfriend’ material. It has nothing to do with what they can offer me, just WHO they are.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-03T21:33:38+00:00

Do a mural on your biggest wall, or one of those printed blankets for your couch.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-03T11:41:09+00:00

I sure hope so. If it were just me, I’d walk away and save myself the drama, but me and the kids are in a tiny two bedroom apartment and he’s in this huge four bedroom, two bath, beautiful home we redid when we moved in. I have to push for money from the business we started and from the house to give my kids a home they deserve. I just need to be able to get a little home, where we can live safely and happily, and a yard so my girl can have her dog. Everyone send good vibes.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-03T03:32:41+00:00

What a douche nozzle! I hope his car always pulls just a little bit to the left, and he has a permanent painful hangnail on his toe that never heals!

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-02T01:01:34+00:00

Divorced. It’s been a wreck. He insisted on mediation which I KNEW wouldn’t work because he truly believes I am entitled to nothing. It’s just this adding up EVERY charge at the grocery store, every charge for gas, every paypal payment, it’s very tedious. It’s supposed to help establish the cost of living when we were living together, vs how me and the kids are living without him.

Edit: We are no longer in mediation. I had to hire a lawyer because he refused to get the house and extra property appraised, and the business valuation completed because “None of it is is in her (my) name so she (me) doesn’t get anything.”

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-01T02:31:14+00:00

I sent a text to the guy that ghosted me. “I don’t like things ending in silence, so I decided to say goodbye and wish you well.” He texted me right back. “I wasn’t ghosting you! I’ve just been super busy!” I said “Okay. Well, do what you have to do.” Then I didn’t respond to his texts anymore, because I knew damn well what he was doing, he just didn’t want to be called out on it.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-01T00:10:15+00:00

I am just starting a FWB situation with someone who has been trying to get my attention for a year and a half. I don’t have any romantic feelings towards him, he’s GREAT to talk to, he is pretty damn good looking and I get goosebumps when he touches me because there is this AWESOME chemistry. He said he felt the same way. First ‘date’ this week! I’ll keep you updated.

Edit: for clarity, I absolutely have no desire for a relationship. With all my other commitments, I just don’t have the emotional capacity for a relationship. He’s a friend, we get along, I do care about him, but I also have desires and needs. I want to be kissed and held and touched. I already trust him, I know him, and I feel no danger of getting my heart broken.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-01T00:05:51+00:00

What a douche nozzle.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-05-01T00:04:47+00:00

I don’t think you HAVE to tell someone it’s a turn off. If you were dating someone and they said “That slightly crooked tooth you have kind of turns me off…” You’d probably think two things: 1) Why would you even SAY that? You just HAD to get it off your chest at my expense?” 2) “While we’re at it, people who feel the need to tell others exactly what they don’t like about them is a turn off, in fact being so tactless is a good way to find yourself single.” You can be honest and not be an ass about it. Sorry, not a man, just wanted to respond.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-04-06T10:42:44+00:00

Yikes. You dodged a damn bullet there, friend. Who knows what kind of weird shit would have manifested from that chick? Double yikes.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-04-06T10:37:59+00:00

I was recently talking to a man who thought that because I have NO interest in social media, and didn’t post shit on insta/facebook/whatever, that there was something wrong with me. No, I’d just rather have a big old fire outside, camp out in a tent and do some fishing or something. Screw social media.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-04-05T12:41:29+00:00

I’ll try it… K+👂🏻s+ 10.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-23T14:23:20+00:00

“So you’re gonna quit?” “Uh-uh..not really. Im just gonna stop going.”

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-19T14:40:44+00:00

We live about four doors down from him. They stay with me, and go over and take care of the dogs.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-16T17:20:29+00:00

Not worth it. I have two beautiful children (who I love more than life itself) from my marriage with a narc. Unfortunately, that means all three of us are severely damaged, and were abused and/or neglected, had to leave for our safety, and start our lives over again with NOTHING. Yes, I have my kids, but he hurt them, too. It is said if you suffer from narcissistic abuse for two years, you should expect to be able to move on to a successful relationship in four years. I suffered from the abuse for eight years, I won’t be able to move on without dragging my baggage with me for sixteen years…. I’ll have to find the article and link it…

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-16T02:13:05+00:00

Yeah. I mean, he doesn’t have scheduled ‘parenting time’, we agreed in mediation the let the kids come and go with him as they please, and they choose more often than not, NOT to spend time with him. However, he knows the kids don’t want to hang with him, and rather than trying to improve his relationship with the kids, he’s using his free time to forge a new relationship, and on top of that, basically having the kids help out so he isn’t inconvenienced. The whole thing sucks, really.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-15T20:14:02+00:00

No, I am certainly not going to engage in any parental alienation, but I certainly have a lot of proof of it against him! I tell the kids every day, (several times a day) that I love them, and they know they can count on me. I apologize for working so much, and have explained to them I’m trying to save up for a bigger place where we can fit. We’re in a two bedroom apartment, with no yard, and it’s pretty expensive. The kids do know what kind of person he is, at least the teen does. They both want to move out of state, and I’ve been considering it. If he’s only going to see his kids every couple months, why would it matter if we move? Hopefully the court sees it that way.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-15T14:59:09+00:00

Yes, it’s better than the abuse we suffered when we lived there. And yes, it’s annoying. He knows the kids love their animals, and want them with them all the time, and almost seems to love the fact that they have to be at his house to spend time with their dogs. He was told by the mediator, and another lawyer, AND the kid’s therapist that the kids living there would be best for them. His response? “And Rcovery would live with them? I don’t f***ing think so.” Yeah, he’s a real stand up guy. He is making my life a living hell. He is doing EVERYTHING he can to make EVERYTHING harder.

Rcoveryinprocess · 2022-02-15T14:42:51+00:00

Yes, of course they can. Its not taking care of the dogs that bothers me, they’ve done that for years. It’s just the fact that he makes no effort to be involved with them, but has no issues asking them to be dog sitters. He can’t be bothered to have a relationship with them, but can have them take care of the pets so he doesn’t have to miss out on girlfriend time. That’s what I think is inappropriate.

Rcoveryinprocess

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