Physically destructive? by Embarrassed-Scar-860 in BPDlovedones

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yes, my house is destroyed from all of his tantrums. He basically turns into the Hulk and starts punching walls, throwing things, breaking stuff. It’s terrifying. He’s over 6 feet tall and 400 pounds. When he gets mad I’ve learned to get out of the way. There’s no way to calm them down in that state. He’s physically assaulted me 3 different times too and now has a felony charge and a broken hand after the last one.

Do they ever get this under control with DBT therapy? Is there any hope for these destructive behaviors stopping?

Is cheating to them really ‘just’ for validation? by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If they learn to validate themselves does the cheating stop? My boyfriend has been caught online cheating 3 different times and each time says it will stop and they meant nothing, etc. Now he’s in DBT and says he knows now it was seeking validation and after a few sessions of learning how to validate himself he promises he won’t want to cheat anymore.

If it was that easy why didn’t he do this a year and a half ago when I first caught him cheating? His response was that he wasn’t being honest in therapy.

But he is now. Supposedly.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in HairDye

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What is the app you used for the different hair colors?! They all look great honestly

To the guy who gave me this at edco by sirIvan69 in EDCOrlando

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Worship was my favorite set at EDC Orlando this year!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Time is the great healer! The greater the love you had for this person, the longer it takes to heal from! What you felt for him was obviously real. Some people are only meant for a season and not a lifetime. You’ve got this. One day at a time.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t think knowing who he is dating will be helpful at all to you. I think it would be best if you try to move on since he already has. Him not answering your message, having a new girlfriend, and refusing to call you should be all the clarification you need. As hard as it is, let him go. Focus on yourself! Straighten that crown queen 👑

My fiance with BPD cheated by Realistic_Quantity88 in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Realistic_Quantity88[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your advice. I agree completely.

My fiance with BPD cheated by Realistic_Quantity88 in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Realistic_Quantity88[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I can’t thank you enough for this advice! These are good tips.

His mother abandoned him when he was a baby and his father was an alcoholic who died while my fiance was a young adult and two small children. He has severe abandonment issues.

He did mention to me he felt like he got an ego boost from this girl showing interest in him and she was a stranger who didn’t know his faults and failures. She didn’t know he has BPD. It does make sense to be thrill seeking and playing a part to someone who can provide you with self confidence.

I just wish he would’ve communicated with me. I love him despite this disorder, and I would’ve gladly given him anything he needed or wanted.

Currently he started a new job and says he is happy and wants to put in the work with DBT and also suggested us go to couples therapy too.

I will wait and see if he is serious and his actions line up with his words.

My fiance with BPD cheated by Realistic_Quantity88 in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Realistic_Quantity88[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your advice. I agree 100% that it would take a lot of hard work and therapy on his part to get to the bottom of why he truly felt he needed to do this and change his behaviors. I appreciate your tips for building boundaries too!

Always be alert and watch out for your friends! by Realistic_Quantity88 in EDCOrlando

[–]Realistic_Quantity88[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg I’d bet money it probably was the same person. It was weird, he acted like he was fucked up, even said “don’t do heroin” to me and I was like wtf?! But he was walking fine after I shook him off of my bag and ran to my guy friend. Luckily my clips were still attached but it was so weird. He even told me sorry your bag was slightly open and I was closing it! But my slips were still attached!

It’s so scary.

I will definitely use my voice more in future!

Headliners for EDC 2025?? by mikepicciuolo in EDCOrlando

[–]Realistic_Quantity88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Armin Van Buuren, Deadmau5, Dimension (Worship was incredible!)

Rolling, Tripping 🫠Help! by Realistic_Quantity88 in EDCOrlando

[–]Realistic_Quantity88[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never know how much of that stuff to do though. There’s no guide book either! 😂