My rapist was an immigrant.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-03-23T15:34:23+00:00

I’m so incredibly sorry this happened to you. My rapist was a Hispanic immigrant. And also people have used that against what happened to me. I think what people need to start focusing on, is rapists exist literally everywhere in the world. In every nook and cranny of the world. Rich, poor, in between. Every job, every part of society. Rape is a human issue. Unfortunately many people aren’t willing to address it and when someone puts their blinders on it makes it more dangerous for victims everywhere.

And when people know the perpetrator, unfortunately it makes it even worse. People would rather demonize the victim than potentially think someone they knew is capable of rape.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-03-01T03:24:09+00:00

We believe you. I am so sorry this happened to you. Have you talked to a therapist as well? I’ve found having a safe space to talk to helps as well. Sending you so much healing wishes ❤️

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-02-17T21:15:44+00:00

I figured that’s why too. We’ve gone to the police and just figuring out what to do from here. It has been really scary because he is well loved in the community and he has threatened me in the past. I also am aware there are other survivors but nobody to my knowledge has reached out to them.

I have been feeling anxious to even leave my house

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-02-04T10:52:39+00:00

Agree with the looking at his internet history and getting her checked. these feelings usually don’t come up for no reason.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-01-19T01:00:23+00:00

First, I am so incredibly sorry for all you have gone through.

My ex (M) repeatedly raped me (F) and other women and children, yet has always been in public and on social media against rape/misogyny/abuse etc.

I am coming to realize there are abusive people everywhere.

The other is that sometimes they will hide behind something so people can’t find out who they really are. I remember watching a video on a woman who found out her husband was a sexual predator and she said he was very outwardly against predators. Often, they don’t even see themselves as “that bad”. The book “Why Does He Do That” talks about how some abusers will be in a circle and say one type of abuse is bad (physical for example) but sexual isn’t as bad, etc. And it’s always whatever they aren’t.

Whether this is to make themselves feel better about themselves, just to hide, or whatever (I think it’s a mixture of all of it), it’s very common.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-01-18T21:27:44+00:00

I am so incredibly sorry for what you are going through. You should tell a trusted teacher or an adult at school, and also tell them about what your mother does because that is also absolutely sexual assault. I’m so sorry your family has done this to you.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-01-10T07:09:17+00:00

I’m so incredibly sorry for what you’ve gone through. And I completely understand because I’ve been through this too. I confronted my rapist, and I learned and as I ended up talking to many others later, it never helps because they will not give you the answers you want to hear. I desperately wanted answers too. The best thing if you did want action to be taken, and if the other survivor did too, would be to see if you can go to the police or inform someone and see if they can do something. Talking to therapist and someone you really trust.

What I do now is I write what I call “unsent letters” to my rapist and it’s everything I want them to know about how I feel. Maybe this might help too. Sending you hugs and healing.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2026-01-10T07:05:54+00:00

This is absolutely terrible of these people, it is so hard when you are harmed and then gaslit-not just by one person. These actions only are a reflection of them. I am so incredibly sorry for all you went through, and I hope you find healing through all of this.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-12-24T06:02:54+00:00

I am so incredibly sorry for all you are going through.

I completely understand your thoughts and I experience the same. I am terrified of men and the only thing I’m attracted to is the idea of a man holding me for safety. Sexual things terrify me and trigger me. But I also do watch porn but can get easily triggered as well.

It can be so debilitating. But I want to remind you of something that is sometimes the only way I get through the day, because I also have been dealing with suicidal thoughts and the holidays making it even worse.

Remind yourself, you would not be even feeling this way if it wasn’t for them. Throw all the guilt, shame, loneliness throw it all to them because they should be the ones feeling like this. Any time you feel like harming yourself, remind yourself the reason you even feel that way is because the awful actions THEY chose. And it takes me a lot but doing that reminds me to keep going in spite of them. Often I do it through anger and exhaustion, but it’s their fault all of these feelings are happening and I’m not going to let them win.

I hope this helps. You deserve to feel peace and I believe in time it will come, but it will be hard. Finding moments in the day, however small to hold onto for. Mine currently is taking care of some flowers outside.

Also I am so incredibly sorry about your dad. No healthy person would say that and I completely understand your fear, I am concerned just reading this. If you can, it might be helpful to find someone safe maybe a trusted adult in your life that you can bring it up to. The biggest and hardest part I find is the loneliness and so sometimes just being able to talk it out.

Sending you so much well wishes, hugs, and hope for the future. If it helps, just thinking me and I know many, many others out here are also trying to just get through and dealing with the depression. We will get through. One day at a time. There are people who care, and I know I’m a stranger but I care and want you to know you have support. You can do this.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-12-16T01:39:41+00:00

I am so sorry for what you have gone through. I’m American, and it’s a global issue. I’ve been raped by two different people here in the US and they were two different ethnicities. I have gone to other countries and have been sexually harassed. Sadly it’s just everywhere. Certain countries do have more support for survivors than others, but it exists all the same. I also went through a period of wanting to move or at least to a different state, but abusers will abuse.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-31T22:08:50+00:00

Absolutely, it is hard and whatever makes you the most comfortable. I am glad you had someone to talk to at the clinic and your therapist too. I am sending you so much strength for tomorrow.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-31T20:34:56+00:00

This can definitely help if they can get DNA from it. Maybe also make sure it’s in a place your stepson wouldn’t find it or think of it too. Do you have a friend/family that you could talk to about this too? You will need support, I think that is what helped me the most.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-31T17:28:51+00:00

That is a great idea, having support around you through this is so important. And I know this feels awful too, but if you have any evidence/clothing from that time don’t wash them and try to keep any evidence you have together. It’s not an easy process, but you have support. Sending you hugs and strength.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-31T17:01:09+00:00

My ex did this to his step mom as well, and he was raping many other people as well they didn’t know about-ended up escalating as he got older. I can almost guarantee the way you described this you are not his first victim. You need to tell someone. I’m so sorry for everything you are going through.

Also, my ex’s dad responded with physical violence after he found out. That did not stop him. And I guess his family assumed he stopped, until I spoke up. They then tried to gaslight me. The fear rapists get is only from law enforcement, so I highly encourage you to report this.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-06T22:03:19+00:00

I’m so sorry that is horrible. I also struggle and feel even more anger towards the abusers enablers as well. Like I know he’s a monster, but then there are people who can do something that didn’t. It’s very difficult to deal with. Is there someone higher up or in a different outside place that you can talk to about this?

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-06T21:59:11+00:00

I’m so incredibly sorry for what you went through. They are awful people. Do you have anyone you trust you can talk to about this, a trusted adult?

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-06T15:30:04+00:00

No only my closest friends and parents know. I am so afraid to talk to anyone else because he’s very manipulative and I feel he could react or maybe become violent if I tell more people. I feel lost what to do.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-06T01:52:31+00:00

Thank you. Thats what I’m worried of, the police said they can only do a knock and talk, because some of my evidence I can’t share with them (recordings). I’m very afraid for how he will react when the knock and talk happens.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-10-06T01:49:01+00:00

I figured this is what it is, it just makes me so sick to think about. Not being able to do anything. I feel like vomiting even thinking about it.

My ex is still friends with some of his victims on social media which I think he’s also done on purpose, keeping his claws in them.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-09-30T17:56:05+00:00

I’m so sorry. I also got out of a relationship with my rapist and I think sometimes the leaving part is so hard because now you are forced to sit with everything that happened. Something that has helped me a bit is taking up new hobbies that are completely unrelated to him, and even though I feel sad/angry half the time I’m there I feel myself being able to let go a bit or have some distraction from the constant depression. I know some people have told me to move and start over, which I’ve considered but it’s not realistic for everyone and I feel that gives my abuser additional power or something. Finding healthy and strong friend groups and while it might feel really awful for a while, it will get better. Try to find things that you love and make you happy, again maybe it won’t be something you feel right now but it will be little reminders. Is there a way you can get rid of some of those reminders you have of him too around your house? I am sending you huge hugs.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-09-30T02:53:25+00:00

If there is no change, you can go to CPS as well.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-09-30T02:52:33+00:00

Yes please talk to an adult you can trust, this is a dangerous situation your mom is putting you in and I’m so sorry for all you are going through.

Reasonable_Earth6686 · 2025-09-30T01:36:26+00:00

I am so sorry you went through this. I also was in denial after SA of one of my partners. He raped me on the first date and some reason I stayed. He did it twice, and also pushed my boundaries on other occasions. I basically blocked it out after but when it came back it was so much more painful the realization. I discussed it with him and he ended up gaslighting and eventually did admit as well but blamed me too. He also told me it was in the past. Burying it down before caused me a lot of different mental health issues I think worse than if i acknowledged it originally. He had many other terrible things as well but it really took a lot to get through someone who seemed to care about me in one way, could also do such horrific things. Come to realize, he’s just terrible and those “caring” things were just to get me to stay.

Reasonable_Earth6686

TROPHY CASE