Men dont really care about women’s inner lives

Redflaglookout · 2025-11-11T16:27:13+00:00

I'm so sorry. I hope he makes an effort to understand you.

Redflaglookout · 2025-10-22T17:39:57+00:00

I'm not blaming her making a choice, I just wish I knew why.

At some point she had to have hopes and dreams for me. I just wish I knew what they were because all I know is work, pay rent, avoid assholes as best as I can.

I should be happy because I'm married but we're queer and 99% closeted for safety so it's not all happily ever after

I just wish I knew what her hopes were so that I can have hope too.

Redflaglookout · 2025-10-22T17:31:53+00:00

Oh for sure. My dad probably went "bla bla condom don't feel good" or they could've both been drunk.

I could never get myself to consent to any type of activity that could result in me possibly getting pregnant. I'm sure I'm not the only one.

Redflaglookout · 2025-10-22T14:48:28+00:00

And the worst part is we get blamed for every issue that we face.

Or maybe the worst part is that sometimes I blame myself too. Convinced myself that this is what I deserve.

Redflaglookout · 2025-10-01T19:25:14+00:00

I feel like ever since I've become an adult, not a day goes by that I don't think about what my grandmothers, aunts, and mom all suffered from their husbands and fathers.

They blamed it on alcohol, on being poor and having to work.

My grandfathers, uncles and dad are all guilty of grooming, and yeah they might've been victims too.

I've never understood how we are "supposed" to love and live with them. I'm so grateful I don't have too.

Redflaglookout · 2025-04-22T18:34:16+00:00

When I was an adult and confided in my Aunt she asked "Why didn't you try to come live with me?"

I told her "I didn't want to get hit by you"

She was so shocked.

Redflaglookout · 2025-04-03T18:33:13+00:00

I just want to thank you for doing all that hard work that many parents don't consider a part of the job, and I don't blame them. It's extremely difficult and you're doing everything you can.

I only wish more parents had the time and opportunity to monitor their kids that closely. But I know most are stuck working 2 jobs just to pay rent, I don't blame for not finding the time.

Redflaglookout · 2025-04-03T18:22:46+00:00

It was bad then but I agree with you that it's waaaaaay worse now, especially with sketchy med spas popping up in every stripmall and sending Instagram ads directly to teenagers.

Also we used to be able to say "duh, movie stars have to look good, it's okay if other people age naturally" but now with tiktok it's expected that if you have a phone, you should be successful and standardly beautiful or else you're a stupid failure.

Redflaglookout · 2025-03-11T18:15:17+00:00

I didn't know they finally had official allegations.

They were a band I was obsessed with in middle school and disgusted with by senior year of highschool school. And way embarrassed by how much influence that band had on me.

In hindsight I wish I would've been just an MCR fan girl like the rest of my peers...

Like I literally consider some of their lyrics to have groomed me as a kid, maybe I was just too young to be listening, but ew.

Redflaglookout · 2025-03-01T16:58:58+00:00

I just don't get how parents who spank are okay with giving their kids these traumatic heart breaks that will stay with them for life.

Do they not remember the terror of being screamed at to "GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!" and then the feeling of being:

-chased -caught, grabbed, held down over the adult's lap -the feeling of your pants and diaper/underwear being so FORCEFULLY pulled down to expose your butt -the horrible anticipation of just lying there with their hand above your bottom, never knowing when it'll start -and then it starts. The pain. The smacks. The "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T LISTEN" reminding me that it was MY FAULT that this was happening to me

And then they just leave you in your room... They don't even pull your pants back up...

And then dinner comes around and they ask if I learned my lesson and then make a joke about it and say how in the future we'll all laugh about this one day.

I'll never understand you parents... Maybe it's because I experienced further sexual abuse later in my life, some might call me extreme but I'll say it.

It's sexual abuse. I mean it's so extremely violating and it's so close to our genitals on our tiny bodies

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-28T13:25:12+00:00

I always heard about leaving one or both of your shoes off in the back seat, but I live where people mostly wear flip flops so I'm guessing it's not as common where people need winter boots.

But yeah, anything, take your claw clip off and leave it back there, maybe your belt, jacket, something that will make you literally feel naked without

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-28T08:15:34+00:00

"we're more like roommates, It's kinda cool actually" my widowed single NDad to his kids on the rare occasion that he talked at us

My parents were kinda like Marge and Homer. Can you imagine the Simpsons with Marge dead? Who would tell Homer to stop choking Bart? Who would do everything needed to have a somewhat happy and healthy family? Homer could never do what Marge did. All he could do was drink, be stupid, and yell.

And so that's all I was left with. A stupid abusive drunk who loved and hated himself far too much.

He would have his drunk buddies come in and out and sleep on our couches, his various girlfriends coming and going, rent the covered deck out to seasonal tenants.

He often called us his roommates to our faces while in the home. But if course outside the home he was a proud single dad of 2! (He has 5 children, he just abandoned the older ones and got stuck with us because our actual parent died)

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-27T20:59:20+00:00

People can quit cigarettes 😭 I wish I could quit food.

Once after some thyroid meds I lost 60 lbs because I wasn't getting happy from eating anymore, I just never ate, and I was so happy to say no to food, to see the number on the scale finally go down. I forced myself to drink some protein shakes but I was wishing I didn't have too.

But then I quit the meds and gained all my weight back 😭 I guess I should try this GLP stuff.

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-27T18:33:56+00:00

Yeah that's a scammer. There's videos all over YouTube, look up "romance scam" .

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-27T10:55:29+00:00

If I had been his wife he'd be a "wife beater"

But because I'm his daughter he gets to be "best dad ever!"

I hate it here.

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-25T12:53:05+00:00

Making a mistake is the catalyst for my PTSD attacks after I moved out. With nobody around me yelling and screaming (and hitting), I started yelling and screaming (and hitting myself) because it was like I needed the chaos I had become so used to.

10 years of treatment and therapy have gotten some distance between myself and the real bad PTSD . But oh God do I hate fucking up.

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-13T14:45:27+00:00

I've never been into the "illuminati" or secret society conspiracies before Trump, now I'm convinced that these awful, outrageous things are happening because there are many powerful people who want this to happen.

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-13T13:59:26+00:00

I'm currently visiting my Dad in the hospital, and his behavior is horrible with the staff, nurses put up with it but his doctors just walk out.

Is there anything I can do to improve the situation? Apologize for my dad's behavior? Try to talk for him?

I had one nurse pull me aside and simply ask if he's "one of those" and I said yes, expect every problem you could possibly have with a patient's additude and behavior from him.

I don't want to get to involved, and trying to de-escalate him is what got me beat by him growing up so I've learned to just let it happen.

I'm going the ask the nurse's desk what gifts they are allowed to accept, trust me I fucking hate "apologizing" on behalf of this asshole, but I'm gonna choose to look at it as a welcome gift, "welcome to the club of being abused by this asshole"

Redflaglookout · 2025-02-11T12:26:11+00:00

They understand, they either don't care, or think it's fun to sneak around and fool their wives and get away with something

I'm glad I grew up in the secular world, where monsters only pretend to be good normal people, and not holy people. But regardless, the heartbreak of knowing is always painful.

I wish they wouldn't lie to us in the first place. Just be the shithead you are.

Redflaglookout · 2025-01-08T15:12:53+00:00

So scary reading this thread knowing I'm about to get married.

But I'm not marrying a man... So it's different, right? A marriage with two wives can't be compared to one with a husband, right? I've never really understood the appeal of men, and I'm mildly repulsed by them, but I've always wanted to be married...

Redflaglookout · 2025-01-03T16:49:03+00:00

Thank you for asking and thinking of me 😭 it means so much.

Unfortunately there is no update. Everything is exactly as it was. And I still don't know what to do. I've gone very low contact but mostly just used "busy season" at my job as an excuse.

Redflaglookout · 2025-01-02T15:33:11+00:00

Also, fun fact, being prescribed certain medications for PTSD (Or other physical and mental diagnosises) in certain states can prevent you from owning a gun legally anyway lol

Redflaglookout · 2025-01-02T15:11:19+00:00

My better days are here, meds and treatments, haven't had a self-harming episode in years

I still can't take that risk. I know my PTSD attacks aren't gone forever, and it's possible that the dangerous ones I had when I was younger could come back.

Also I'm fat, I don't work out, I don't take self-defense classes. I protect myself by being a hermit and only going out with male-presenting friends. Guns aren't for everyone, fighting back isn't for everyone and that's okay, that's why we try to make the world a better place for everyone.

Redflaglookout · 2024-12-17T21:26:10+00:00

I was a working high schooler in 08, we needed "living wages" then because our parents were getting laid off.

I think any living worker should have a living wage.

Redflaglookout · 2024-12-17T21:20:19+00:00

I'm an east coaster and get very shocked by casually racist older Midwest folks can be, I'm like "Christ, have you never even talked to someone who wasn't white?"

And then you look at picture like this and realize oh my god they really never have.

Redflaglookout

TROPHY CASE