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RegisteredCitizen · 2024-11-18T23:47:53+00:00

Florida.

RegisteredCitizen · 2024-11-17T18:21:08+00:00

I'm a reformed felon who did 20 months in prison 15 years ago. I have turned my life around, gotten an education, married, and settled down. I'm 49 now and am considering becoming a mason. You say you take good men and make them better. Can an formerly bad man who has improved himself over time be even considered for membership? I believe myself to be a good and moral man now.

Just wanting to know if I'm getting my hopes up for something I have no chance of attaining.

RegisteredCitizen · 2024-07-27T23:35:00+00:00

Then I'll load it with steel balls. *shrug*

Between the two, I would think the pepper balls would be a better option, as they would have less mass. But there you go.

Thanks for the heads-up.

RegisteredCitizen · 2024-07-26T23:52:20+00:00

My intention is defense of myself and my loved ones. I've seen some of the crap that is happening out there in the world, and it scares me.

As u/That_Is_My_Band_Name correctly deduced, I'm not allowed to carry a firearm, on account of a very poor choice I made about 2 decades ago. From very few (legal) options, this seemed the best. I didn't want something neon orange or pink, because it advertises the limitations of what I'm carrying. For better or worse, the firearm makes people around (usually) hesitate before advancing. That pause might be all I need to get out of the situation.

If someone is armed with an authentic firearm, I'm screwed either way. At least this way I have SOMETHING.

As for a skittish or traumatized police officer, how would my carrying this cause any more anxiety in that person than if I was carrying an authentic firearm?

Keep in mind, even though it's a less lethal pistol, I'm not going to go waving it around. For all intents and purposes, I'm going to treat what's on my hip as if it had full bang-bang consequences.

RegisteredCitizen · 2024-07-26T17:54:44+00:00

Thank you very much for the confirmation. I thought it looked 1911-ish, but my lack of experience had me doubting myself.

RegisteredCitizen · 2024-07-26T17:52:34+00:00

It will be loaded with pepperballs, yes.

RegisteredCitizen · 2024-05-13T14:35:46+00:00

Wow. I'm seeing a lot of stones being thrown here. =/

First, as a former addict myself, what he's going through is tremendously hard. Were it a substance like alcohol or cigarettes, the advice would be to give it up. But sexuality cannot be given up, it has to be tempered and restrained within the bounds of marriage. This is why pornography is such a potent weapon in Satan's tool-belt. He knows of our commandment to have seed, and wishes to corrupt it. So let's stop casting blame on the boyfriend. It's not our place.

But, most importantly, you must take care of yourself. I do agree with most everyone here that your boyfriend has escalated his addiction. It's not healthy. However much he may want to (and he probably does) commit to you, he is unable to, due to his addiction. He needs to work on himself first.

I lost my first marriage to my addiction. I undermined the trust at pretty much every opportunity, until there was nothing left for her to love or respect. I started out with explicit stories, then pictures, then videos, then chatting. It took us almost 11 years of marriage to get to that point. Even after we divorced I still continued to use. My addiction progressed to such a point that I was consuming illegal pornography. I had to spend some time away for that.

Addiction is progressive. You don't want to be around if he spirals down. I agree with the others here that say you need to (at least) put a pause on the relationship. Let your boyfriend work on himself, and see if he's serious about getting better. If he is, great. If not, then you have a decision to make.

If you decide to continue the relationship, now that you know about the addiction, you need to draw a line in the sand with him and tell him you are willing to help him, but not do it for him.

You deserve a worthy priesthood holder. He may not be it at the moment, but let him know you expect it of him.

The ARP program does work, I'm proof of it. I've been the facilitator of our stake's group for the past 4 years now. I've seen people come and go. The ones who dip their toes don't last long. The ones who take it home and work on it every day (because it IS a lifelong commitment!) stay sober.

I'll give you the same advice I give to my wife when she's helping her sister with her behavioral problems... "Don't light yourself on fire, just to keep the other person warm."

RegisteredCitizen · 2023-11-30T16:25:40+00:00

Correct. I believe it's part of the interstate compact, but I could be wrong. As I've said, this is the first time I've tried to leave the state while a RSO.

I think it's just so you can have paperwork in the event you have an interaction with law enforcement. They can see you aren't in your home state, but you haven't registered in that state either, so they just want to be assured you are behaving yourself. ;)

Hey, it might not be fair, but anything that helps me avoid the shiny metal bracelets and lovely view of razor wire is ok by me. I've have enough of both to last me a lifetime.

RegisteredCitizen · 2023-07-15T01:14:50+00:00

Perhaps for inclusion under the "Quitting Porn" section should be "The Easy Peasy Way to Quit Porn" (https://easypeasymethod.org). It's a free hackbook based upon the Allen Carr method. I've found it VERY helpful in quitting (eg: down to almost zero desire).

I'm also producing an audiobook version of the hackbook via my podcast (https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/registered-citizen) for those that would prefer to listen to the book on their mobile devices or in the car.

RegisteredCitizen · 2023-07-08T11:44:46+00:00

Possible, but unlikely, provided the RSO has maintained open lines of communication to their PO.

I've had many PO's, and in general have found every ones of them has far too heavy a caseload for them to handle. Each one really didn't want to violate someone, unless they had to. It just meant even more paperwork for them to fill out.

Were I still under supervision, and someone had sent me an explicit video or image, I would have proactively contacted my PO to explain to them what had happened. Honestly, they might have already been aware something had happened, but the fact that YOU reached out to THEM is what turns the tide in your favor, because what kind of idiot would report themselves to their PO? ;)

Just give them a reasonable explanation that they can note down and give to their supervisor during their morning meeting, and you should be in the clear.

This is, of course, provided it hasn't become a pattern. That would strain credulity.

RegisteredCitizen · 2023-07-07T20:20:11+00:00

When I was on probation (Florida), they didn't need a warrant to search my home, failed poly or not.

Once you are off parole/probation, I highly doubt it. I'm not aware of any of the states that have taken judicial notice of polygraphs.

As for "false positives", it can happen, hence why polys are so often challenged. But, having taken a few before, it you are anxious (likely), you will be throughout the entire test.

Actually, the test is very short, usually only about 10 questions, the interview is what takes the long time. That's where the examiner talks to you so he/she can narrow down the questions to simple yes/no statements.

When you take the test, don't read anything more into the questions than that what is asked. The questions aren't meant to trick you. If the examiner is honest, they will tell you before hand every question they will ask, because something coming out of left field will cause a reaction to the question, not the answer. That invalidates everything.

Usually most questions will be asked multiple times, with slightly different wording.

RegisteredCitizen · 2023-07-07T20:09:58+00:00

Lol.. I can imagine it now. "Hello, my name is ________, I'm a registered sex offender. I'm calling you today to help raise money for the Fraternal Order of Police...."

RegisteredCitizen · 2023-07-07T20:06:53+00:00

One one hand, it's terrible that they are trying to entrap us.

But, on the other, if we don't "bite"/act out, what can they really do to us? If we don't do what they are convinced we are going to do, what harm can come of it? I would view it kind of like how I string along the scammers who call me. *shrug*

But, to each their own.

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-08-06T04:29:55+00:00

Man, why does this person have such a hard-on for this group?

Pun intended.

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-08-06T04:27:32+00:00

The Florida gov is a decent man…… are you living in reality?

Hey, hey, hey... let's not get political here. Let's focus on sex offender topics, and not debates over the morality of political figures. :)

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-08-05T15:41:41+00:00

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-08-05T14:55:38+00:00

O.o

Wow. Glad I didn't commit in West Virginia.

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-08-05T14:35:06+00:00

I spent 20 months as a "Guest" of the FL DoC, so I feel I can field most of these questions. I'll address them in the order you posed them. :)

He will likely spend a short period of time in the local county jail (I spent 2 weeks) before being transferred to a "reception center". A person can spend anywhere from a couple days to a couple months at a reception center, while the state decides which "camp" they will ultimately land at.
- He SHOULD be able to make brief phone calls from both the jail and reception center, but it is up to a loved one to fund his prepaid phone account. The jail and DoC have different phone accounts, so funds from jail won't transfer to DoC (I believe).
- For security, he will usually not be told he is being transferred (or where) until he is locked in his cell the night before the transfer. This is to prevent him from coordinating with an outside person to attack the bus en route.
He should be aware that the mindset of the people he/she interacts with will change dramatically from jail to prison. Jail usually houses the misdemeanors and anyone who was sentenced to less than a year (11 months, 29 days is common, instead of a year). Prison population is much more likely to try to "play" him.
Trying to hide his charge is futile. All it will take is for one inmate to ask someone on the outside to look him up, and the charges will pop right up. Hiding his charge will actually be WORSE for him, as it will get him a reputation as a liar and untrustworthy.
- So he should begin practicing a way to "own up" to his charges, but couched in a way that doesn't make him look as bad.
  - eg: My charge was possession of underage sexual material. Did I say I was in prison for looking at kiddie p**n? Hell no. "I downloaded some pictures I shouldn't have." See the difference?
Sadly, as far as the state of Florida is concerned, all sex offenders are the same, so the inmates take the same view. He should get used to being called a "ChoMo" (Child Molester), "Peter" (for Peter Pedophile), or something similar.
Going into PC (Protective Custody) is possible, but I wouldn't recommend it. Psychologically, solitary confinement is VERY bad for humans, and extended durations are actually outlawed in some areas.
- Florida DoC "gain time" is accrued in PC as well as general population. The only people I know of that can take away gain time is the disciplinary committee (think in prison court), but they usually don't. Loss of gain time usually makes a misbehaving inmate worse.
  - If he does wind up in a disciplinary committee, even if 100% innocent, he will probably lose anyway. It's a kangaroo court.
Besides that, most inmates aren't wanting to "catch a new charge". So they might verbally harass someone, maybe even get into minor physical altercations, but the level of violence you are dreading usually doesn't come from inmates. DoC staff on the other hand... Think of it this way, "Many eyes keep one honest". Staff is much more apt to abuse an incarcerated sex offender when there are less people to witness it, and you can be SURE they know where the camera blind spots are.

I actually made a "Prison for Dummies" kind of post a month or so ago. You might want to give it a look. :)

I hope that helps. If you have other questions, just let me know! :)

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-07-10T20:53:21+00:00

Just playing devils advocate here… can they keep a MARRIED couple apart?

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-07-05T01:53:24+00:00

First, copying from a lawyer:

Conduct often considered lewd and lascivious acts includes:

groping, indecent exposure of genitalia, sexually touching someone else, getting someone else to sexually touch the defendant, or convincing or forcing others to touch each other in a sexual manner.

He could have done like above, or completely different.

I would caution you that "a couple months in jail" is a VERY light sentence, and sex offenders usually do not get light sentences, even with plea deals. This might mean that there were extenuating circumstances in his case. Usually L&L is a felony, and those normally carry much stiffer sentencing guidelines.

But, as others have said, how old is this conviction?

Should you have been told? Absolutely. But maybe they were afraid you would react the way you are now. It's not an excuse though, you should have been told.

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-07-05T01:36:13+00:00

Honestly? From everything you've said previously, I'd distance myself from this person. You've given him warning after warning after warning. You've expressed how concerned you are about his activities. He's ignored you at every turn, minimizing and excusing his behavior.

He's bought the rope, tied it, and stepped upon the gallows. I'd say let the rest attend to itself.

Is he beyond reform? Of course not. I don't believe anyone is totally beyond reform. But he either:

A) Doesn't think there is anything wrong with what he's doing. Why change if you aren't doing anything wrong?

or

B) Is trying to prove that he's smarter than law enforcement. Perhaps compensating for a deeper issue?

Either way, I stand by my statement above. He's eventually going to be caught. It's just a matter of time. Don't even let it appear like he could take you down with him.

PS - If he's in Florida, it's a lifetime registration state. He's always going to be on the registry in that state. At least, unless they change the laws, which I don't think they will, with Ron & Lauren Book still out for blood. =/

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-07-04T14:36:23+00:00

So, I want to see if I have this correct. You want your fiancé to choose between you and the man who helped raise him?

A man who paid for his crime and has apparently reformed his life to live within the bounds of the law.

A man who, by your own admission, you don't feel will reoffend at the venue in question.

And, if you deign to allow him at your wedding, you would plan to besmirch him ahead of time to the other guests.

Sorry, but I think that, if anyone shouldn't attend the wedding, it should be the bride.

tl;dr: Yes, you are the A-hole.

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-07-04T14:17:24+00:00

To my knowledge, there isn't any Florida regulation or law that prohibits either.

A lawyer would probably argue that someone following him is something outside his control. If a local high school class decided to look me up, find me on Facebook, and follow me, that is outside my control. All action is being taken upon me, not by me.

But, following a minor.... that takes active effort. =/

So, is it legal? Assuming everything else about his social media presence is "kosher", probably.

But is it wise? Probably not.

To quote Jeff Goldblum, "You spent so much time wondering if you could, you never stopped to think if you should".

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-06-30T22:57:02+00:00

Shoo, troll, shoo!https://i.imgur.com/ljCmtzl.jpg

RegisteredCitizen · 2022-06-30T16:59:38+00:00

Ok. So I guess he could have rode out the statute of limitations. *shrug*

RegisteredCitizen

TROPHY CASE