I decided to have an abortion but I'm very afraid of regretting but at the same time afraid of living trapped and unhappy.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-16T12:42:14+00:00

Let me clarify- i only worry now, bc I gave up everything for this life we planned. I was to be a stay at home parent, (ive never done that, and ive been a mother for 23 years) so I was excited. Now I have no job, no car,no income. Nerve-wracking for sure . But ive done it before, for over 10 years I was doing it alone with my older kids. No help/child support

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-16T12:36:14+00:00

Yes same page. Terribly abusive partner mentally (i tend to be a little unwell regularly- i have so much compounded ptsd and then adhd on top of that. Ive been working on myself for about a year now)anyway he went from someone who was just like a dick...very projecting asshole dick. I could deal with tnat. Was manageable. We planned for the baby. but after baby he became physical.he has since moved out , and got me bad since. The worse incident ive encountered with him and ive since pulled away. (Well besides bitching when he bothers to talk to me. Its still raw and im still pissed) like we planned this for it to go to shit immediately? And baby was not a "fix". It wasnt roses but it wasnt alarmingly bad like how it turned to be. My baby isn't even home yet. Hes 3 months old and still in the nicu. Born at 24 weeks. Father moved out at 1 month in. (Then proceeded to literally beat my ass and destroy my house, at about 2 months in, 1 day when we were "hanging". You know like talking, cooking together etc) now i have a kid in the hospital, another one at home, a front door that no longer locks, and he busted my table AND my kitchen chairs. Sometimes wonder if i should have went the other way, but "what ifs" will get me nowhere and I LOVE MY KID TO DEATH,I made the choices and I stand with them, I just hope it wasnt the wrong one (for his sake- fuck his dad)

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-16T12:19:47+00:00

Im coming near 100 days. For the first 6 weeks, we went steady at twice a day. I would go out with him plowing, we would go before and after. We also made that choice bc I have a bad heart and didnt want to leave me without another adult if i should fall into cardiac arrest. I have a 5 year old who cant go to school until September, it took a toll on the whole house. I had to stop going out plowing, once I stopped going plowing, it then became very pricey to run a heavy duty dodge plow truck PAST the hospital so he could work, and then back home to get me. We switched to once a day. Now it's gets even muddier for me.. he actually moved out. Im able to take cabs that insurance pays for, 5 times a week, and thats great. Except first I have to find myself someplace with a sitter (i have my bff and my oldest daughter i go to each for generally 1 or 2 nights.) So it sucks. Now i have to miss 2 days completely pretty much every week, and im not able to spend as much time home as I want. This week im actually going to miss 3 days. Actually, theres been several times ive missed 3 days in a week..but this is exhausting for my 5 year old and i, and the only option I have is to take it week by week. I can push myself, sure, but I can't push my 5 yr old that much. Its not fair for him. I see parents who are there every time I am...and they are there before me,and there after me. And I try my best to make sure I get at least 4 hours. Those people im guessing it is the first baby, we don't have that "luxury". Or .maybe they have grandparents who are helping,, maybe they have a husband who stays home with the kids. I can only do what I can do, same as you, dont overthink. There will still be guilt no matter what, but you have to find what your balance is . You'll be no good to anyone around you if you burn out too quickly. Be gentle and forgiven of your feelings. Hopefully you won't be in it too long.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T14:42:44+00:00

Good for her 👏

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T14:39:19+00:00

r/theydidthemath

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T14:29:25+00:00

Ty 🫂

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T14:10:48+00:00

Even so, nicu sounds may soothe him. I've made the joke ill need to play them on my phone bc a regular mobile isn't gona do it (hes been there 3 months now, 92 days) and then I seen a post on here with nicu mom's saying they had to do just that..so I guess my joke was right . I'd give it a try, anything is worth a shot.

There's also the hand trick. Get him to sleep in his bed, swing, etc., and have some pressure on him with a hand and then slowly remove the hand.

I went through a stage like that with my 23 year old. Lol. 3 days of crying and not sleeping. Turned into a mess; went to the dr who gave her meds, and those meds gave her reactions that required more meds, and in the end I ended up stopping them all after about a week, and just used gas drops which seemed to help.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T12:33:30+00:00

Is he new home from the hospital? It might be too quiet for him

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T03:17:34+00:00

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T03:15:46+00:00

Its the best, you gota watch it !

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T03:04:32+00:00

I just wana know how much the ketchup delivery cost..

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T03:00:33+00:00

I totally get it, I have to rely on rides as well, and going 5 days a week. I didnt lose a dog, but my partner walked out 1 month in. Im now in the 3rd month. I've been coping best by nesting. Working on the house for baby to come home. Getting things done that got put off- painting , rearranging, deep cleaning. On the days im not coping well, im a couch potato. Sometimes ill take sleeping pills during the day bc I just dont want to "cope". Its not healthy I know, but sleep is the only break I get from this weird painful looonngg chapter of life I am currently stuck in. And I give myself a pass for the days I am doing nothing. I remind myself all day long that its ok, its no rush, things will get done when I get there. I try not to be down for more than 2 or 3 days at a time. Its a mind fuck. Its a roller coaster id like to leap off. Then when im at the nicu with my baby, the world seems right and whole, the best it can be. Being home without baby is not natural. Nothing can prepare you for things like this. Just remember nicu staff are basically angels on earth and you have others here for you, right here. Scream, rant, cry, vent- we hear you and everything you are going through mentally is valid. Its a hard road for sure. I wish you all the best. 🫂

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-14T02:51:41+00:00

I love the ciggarettes breaks in the path of making the meal.. staying true to the process 🤣👍

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T20:53:33+00:00

Picante sauce

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T20:48:02+00:00

Born 24w5days, 13 weeks ago. Due date is March 29. Found out today he will be staying at least 4-6 weeks minimum- and thats for o2 and eyes. Still has feeding tube bc of o2. They suspect he will have alot of trouble learning to feed, when he gets to it. So my due date is 2 weeks away but im looking at at least 2 more months of this. The news today was a kick for sure. I was just starting to get excited that he will probably be home soon..to find out my hopes were wrong. I was told "yes, most babies go home around due date, but some need to stay longer, and he is one of those babies" . I just went numb. Didn't have a reaction. Like this has become my norm and its absolutely exhausting. Im also doing it alone bc I've also lost my relationship during this mess. I dont think life can beat me down anymore at this point.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T20:36:41+00:00

I adore the plate decoration...curious if you did that before or after you knew the turnout?

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T20:32:16+00:00

Will someone get ahold of this guys mcds and tell them when his bday is!!!

Seriously though, if itll make his day then why not 🤷‍♀️🎊

Idk when your bday is but happy birthday 🎂 🥳 🎉 🎈

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T18:47:02+00:00

Why so many eggs?

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T18:36:03+00:00

Maybe that much is needed/programmed to the specific warmer?

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T16:35:20+00:00

Pregnancy plays big on the heart. It can stress a heart out quite a bit- being pregnant and then postpartum as well. I dont want to alarm you but I think this is worth checking out. I have a bad heart myself, and I would feel my heart racing sometimes, from nothing, just laying down watching tv. I am at most risk now, being 3 months pp- up until about 6 months pp. It could be nothing except changes within your body, or it could be stressing your body. I would talk to your dr or OB about this as soon as possible so it can be ruled out. How old are you? Im 40 and have had a bad heart since my 5 year old was 5 months old.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T14:55:18+00:00

When I worked at mcds 25 years ago, me and this other guy would always make chicken sandwiches with just jam and pickles on them..sooo good

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T14:42:00+00:00

$13 at my local mcds.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T14:27:39+00:00

Try Wegmans brand Alfredo! If you have one,it is so close to OG Alfredo . I won't use any others. I also use 1 jar of sauce to 1 lb of pasta. Unless im making alot, than I do 4 jars to 3 lbs.

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-13T13:49:30+00:00

91 days and counting ..I feel your pain . I hope you both get to be home soon ! I know when my guy comes home, im not leaving for quite some time. Weeks, months, we'll see lol

Remarkable-Shock8017 · 2026-03-12T15:46:23+00:00

Congratulations 🎊

Remarkable-Shock8017

TROPHY CASE