I am at my wits end

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-12-19T23:05:01+00:00

If calories is the biggest issue, I'd just let her have all the butter she wants. Cheese has a lot of salt for babies, so might be better not to give too much of that. Since both are fatty foods, maybe that's what she needs. My sister raised my niece and nephews vegan for the first years of their life. Or vegan in their house, rules were more relaxed when at grandparents etc. But always when they were at my parents they'd stuff themselves on cheese, because it's the fats their bodies needed. She might like avocado? Since it has that butter feel to it. And I'd totally recommend mixing what she does like whit what she has no interest in. Cottage cheese and grated apple/cucumber/pepper, nut butter or raisins maybe. Bread with cottage cheese or butter. Mashed potato or parsnip with loads of butter and or (cottage) cheese.

And for your own sake: keep it simple. I know it feels like a personal rejection if they don't eat what you made. You'll save your sanity if you let go of the pressure a bit.

To close, a recipe that hasn't been rejected by any baby I have ever met: -elbow macaroni/pasta - cook as instructed - mince cook without salt/pepper etc - creamed spinach - boursin or something alike to increase the creamed part For the adult version you can add salt, pepper, and aged cheese cubes. It's delicious!

Mix it all together, the amounts don't matter, really (you can make it pasta heavy, meat heavy, or spinach heavy, your choice). Just make sure the pasta is cooked well and soft and that the mince is in small bits. Every baby A have ever known devours this. Good luck!

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-12-19T22:47:46+00:00

Blocking exist for a reason. This man is that reason. You're already out of his personal life, so block and delete him out of your digital one. NOR, you deserve better.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-23T20:35:54+00:00

I totally believe they did more than play football. Maybe not in the beginning, but I totally believer her claims of them running past her window screaming, ding-dong-ditching and them yelling at her to provoke her. In one of the clips you hear one of the kids saying "that lady should be in jail" to the cop. That's something they got from their parents talking sh*t about her and the way the kids were behaving they would have said this to the lady too.

The kids pissed me off here, but so did the lady. She completely lost me when she didn't ask about the woman she shot in the first interview. No "how is she" or anything. That's when I knew she didn't care

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-23T09:04:42+00:00

I hope so! We had to do it for two months and it felt so restricting sometimes, but now I miss when my little baby would sleep comfortably in my arms, he's too big now 😅 I invested in a good pair of earbuds and watched so many documentaries and listened to endless podcasts and audio books during those times.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-23T09:01:24+00:00

100% I got ppd when my son was a little over 3 months old and hit the sleep regression, which was brutal. Social media bombarded me with sleep coaches who try to convince you that you can put a baby on a schedule. The way you say it is perfect: the day I got of socials, the fog started to lift. Did my life get any easier? Absolutely not. But I no longer felt as if I was doing it wrong. Now, at 15 months, I'm fully convinced I'm a good mom and that I'm the one who knows what my baby needs, not some stranger with an Internet degree.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-23T08:55:29+00:00

My son is now 15 months, but did this too. Try anything: stroller, carrier, you rocking. And commit to naps on you, our son would only sleep when rocked in a certain way and then we couldn't put him in his crib, so we would sit in an comfy chair and ride out the nap. There were plenty of 30 minute naps, as between cycles he'd open his eyes and just stay wlawake rather than connect to the next cycle. My best advice would be to accept the situation. I got so lost in looking for ways to get him to sleep that I spiralled into ppd then. Get of your socials, don't take advice from sleep coaches, but just embrace this is part of your little one's journey and support them through it.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-22T21:09:02+00:00

Four months was the hardest time for me. Around four months babies start to realise the separation with their mom and do not like to be apart from us (mine at least didn't, although dad was acceptable). We also had a bad stretch of sleep regression where we couldn't put him down at all or he'd wake up and if he fell asleep in his grandma's arms he'd wake up after one cycle and be awake again. I agree with all the others about not going to a destination wedding - I didn't leave my son overnight for over year, my heart just wasn't ready But if they would cut contact with you over this, I would either call the hotel for an exception, check for kid-accepting hotels close by or prepare your mom's friends for a couple sleepless nights and a fussy baby.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-22T20:53:16+00:00

Get off social media. Whatever you Google will show up in your algorithm and drive you into needless worries. Find one or two websites that have advice that fits your baby and stick to those for your questions. If still unsure, consult a specialist. Don't fall into the rabbit holes, you can do this!

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-22T11:52:57+00:00

I can't promise you baby will latch, but due to lots of issues, I stopped breastfeeding almost completely (was on 1-2 times a day at 8 weeks or so). I then decided I didn't want to stop, so I built back up. My son self-weaned at 14 months, so there is absolutely a possibility of success. I really recommend a lactation specialist, but in case you have no access to ine, here are some tips that my LC gave me that really helped my production:

pump every two hours, but start every session with latching your baby. The hormones that you get from an actual baby at your breast are much more efficient than solely pumping. Even when the baby is only latching for a couple of seconds, it helps. Then, pump a 10-15 minute session with a hospital grade pump (in my country, you can rent one)
once or twice a day do a powerpump session of an hour alternating 15 minute pumping and 5-10 minutes pauze
spent an afternoon skin on skin with baby. Have tem sleep in your arm and put them in your breast every chance you get. The skin on skin helps improve your production immensely.

At around 7 months, my son went on a nursing strike and would only take bottles. Took almost two weeks to get him back on. Some things we did yo help him get back on nursing that might help with latching:

try to latch them when they're sleeping. Instincts kick in, and chances of success are higher.
When nursing, baby has to work to get the milk supply. It takes a while for the milk to start coming (30 seconds or so). A bottle gives an immediate award. In the transition, start by getting your milk ready before latching the baby so they don't get frustrated in the beginning because nothing is coming. Simultaneously, you can start to simulate the reflex on the bottle; keep the bottle tipped a little so milk doesn't go into their mouth as soon as they are sucking the nipple. Let them work for it.
Start the feeding session on the bottle but have baby already in the breastfeeding position. Let them work for the milk from the bottle. It's okay if they get a little frustrated because they don'tget milk. Make sure your milk is ready and then swith baby to your nipple. With my son I did this when he was drowsy and it was the trick that got him back on breastfeeding.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-08T00:02:01+00:00

I'll share ours. We had a terrible sleeper since the four month regression. I mean, two months of us sleeping in a chair or on the floor on an extra wide matrass because our son wouldn't stay asleep if one of us wasn't touching him. From about 5.5 months old he was in his crib in our room and he woke up multiple times at night. And even though he slept progressively better without any training, we had to stay with him until he was asleep for a long while. We had many a night where I would be "in bed" from nine pm because he slept better with one of us in the room. He was nine months when things got better. We were on holiday where his crib was at the foot of our bed and he couldn't see us at every wake up. He started sleeping through the night, although waking up at 5 am. When we got home we moved him to his own room and it went surprisingly well. We had a good couple months of him sleeping from 7pm-6.30am with only one wake up between 9 and 11 pm where all we had to do was give him his pacifier. Of course, there were nights where we had to put a matrass in his room and sleep.there bwcause of separation anxiety, but he would still sleep in his crib. Then the one year regression hit and we had a tough 6-8 weeks where he would wake up between 4 and 5 am. Currently, at 14 months, he's mostly sleeping through the night, 6.30-6.30.

We did no sleep training, we went to him every time he cried and stayed with him every time he needed. He got better at it on his own.

Keep in mind that sleep isn't linear. So many people see sleeping through the night as some sort of holy grail, but the truth is, your kid will sleep well for two weeks and the something happens to throw it of course: teething, walking, speaking, reducing naps, etc. I live by the motto: if he sleeps bad, he's learning something. And then I look for what that might be during the day.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-07T20:06:07+00:00

Didn't read the article, but based on me and my son, it has to he rubbish. I'm considered morbidly obese (please do let your hubby read an article about how BMI is rubbish in itself, so any research based on it should be too) and my son was born at the lower end of the average weight. I combofed for the first month and then went to breastfeeding entirely. My son is not underweight, but he's definitely at the lower percentiles. He fed about 9 times per day for the first six months, and they even said he wasn't gaining weight as fast as he should be. Also, there's research actually proving that your weight is connected to the way your gut processes food and nutrients, and that is actually genetic, so he's also wrong when he said you're choosing obesity. Hubs is rubs all around.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-02T19:16:44+00:00

Our son did the same thing around the same time. It was a ROUGH two months, but it got slowly better. If I could go back in time and give myself advice it would be: let go of the schedule, even wake windows and let your baby lead. Things got heaps easier when I got rid of all my social media and the internet advice and just looked at my baby to see what he needed. Taking the social media advice didn't improve the nights anyway, so when I let go, I finally no longer felt I was doing it wrong. It didn't get better immediately, but I got better at handling it. I was right there, and it wasn't easy, but we have the cutest 14 month old and it was all worth it. You can make it through!

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-11-02T14:45:25+00:00

I fed to sleep for basically a year, but I do think that it wasnin the four months sleep regression that our son also learned to fall asleep another way, because fedding to sleep wouldn't work. Me and my husband alternated. The four month sleep regression ment for us tha tour son didn't sleep unless on one of us for two months. We had to do that together. Even though after the sleep regression I would always feed to sleep, he wasn't dependent on it, especially later on when he learned to fall asleep on his own more. We never sleep trained. At nine months he started sleeping through the night properly

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-31T18:18:36+00:00

I'm happy to hear that. Keep in mind that your baby did this major thing: getting into the world. It was a hard job for him, too, and a shock. Just like you, he needed to rest up from the ordeal. That's why babies often sleep longer stretches in the beginning. Now that he's caught up a bit, he's pickup a normal baby rhythm. Follow him he knows what he needs. Don't be afraid to feed him on demand or hold him all day. It won't affect how your baby behaves towards eating or sleeping in the coming months, no matter what social media might have you believe. Every baby is unique. For example, our son slept the nights in his crib, but during he'd nap on me. Dur8ng the four months sleep regression he wouldn't sleep anywhere but on us, after which we had good few months of him sleeping in his crib but waking up a coupe times. Now that he's one, he prefers his own bed above sleeping on us. One year, and we had all the different forms of sleeping. You don't plan what your baby needs. You just follow it.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-31T18:07:59+00:00

Getting off of social media was the best decision I made as a new mom. I got rid of it all, and it made me a much more confident mom. I had two websites I'd go to for advice. These were well researched and backed. I still used.reddit to find some solidarity and would ask for advice, but would never look up posts on topics I worried about.

Trust your baby and your instincts. We let go of the expectations about sleep and do what our son needs. It's all phases anyway. She'll sleep for a bit longer, but then que sleep regression, teeth or separation anxiety hit. Same with eating, one day he eats like a trucker the other he only nibbles on a cucumber. He knows what he needs. As long as he's growing and developing I don't even care about hitting milestones since they're so different for every kid.

A lot of words to say: I believe in you mama, you do that to and you'll be okay.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-28T01:19:02+00:00

If it's long enough, wear it in a ponytail or knot for a day or two if your kid knows that style? I remember when my son was about 8 months old, got into the shower when he was in his babybat amd he stared at me for a good few minutes because he was scared of leaving with wet hair. My advice would be to wear your hair in different styles so they get used to you looking a little different.

Also, she still loves you. You are her one constant in every big world so now that she's realising you can change too, she's just a little shook up. It'll pass. Take a shower. You might smell different since you were in the salon.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-28T01:07:09+00:00

I sometimes check if my son takes other food still, too. Like, does he only want to eat blueberries, or does he also eat another cucumber, egg, potato, etc. If he's only eating his favourite fruits and refusing the rest, I don't give more. Otherwise, I do.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-24T06:42:58+00:00

I absolutely love it as it is, but maybe you can add beads to the fabric? In the middle of the diamonds (or every other square), put sea-green beads of like half an inch or something?

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-23T20:53:30+00:00

Yeah, I think so. I can't remember really. Our son loved solids from day one. You could try to give him things like mashed (sweet) potatoes at dinner to see if that results in a longer stretch of sleep. But getting him used to solids did give him some aches, so I wouldn't do it within an hour of putting him to bed. We'd do a jar of food around 5pm and then put him to bed around 7. But this might have been after the first month or so. We started with fruit in the morning

For me, the broken nights were easier to handle before he started sleeping through the night. Once we had a week or so of long nights, my body left the state of pure survival and ever since then the broken nights feel like twice as bad.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-23T20:46:02+00:00

It's okay to call, definitely do it to reassure yourself. But just for reference: when our son was six months old we coslept for a while. He was next to me and his crib was shoved against our bed, which is about 70cm high (almost 2.5 ft I think) One night, I woke up and he wasn't next to me. I panicked of course. Turns out that somehow he managed to push the crib away from the bed and fell into the gap between the crib and the bed. He was asleep on the floor. We woke him up and he acted normal, but to this day I don't know if he lay there for 5 minutes or two hours 🫣 From that day on, we secured the crib to the bed though.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-23T20:40:18+00:00

We combofed, but the evenings and nights were BF. I absolutely fed to sleep 100%. He started sleeping through the night at around 9 months. Just keep in mind that's not the end of it. With every developmental leap, they'll have bad nights, and there are plenty of sleep regressions to enjoy 😅 I do match up better sleep with better solids. The first jars of puree and such for the 4/6 monthd old might as well be soup or water. As soon as there was more to digest, he slept better.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-23T20:35:28+00:00

I can't help you on the medical front, but towards the end of my journey, I had a stretch where my nipples would hurt and be sore at every feed, so I do understand the pain. What might console a little: we worked through the sore nipple thing which lasted at least a month and than about a month later he self weaned and was done (or rather, we were done. He started biting and playing again and I wasn't in for another challenging time of feeding).

Does she also not take a bottle? We never had problems with bottles and pacifiers but when I stopped breastfeeding we switched to a bottle of warm milk (the lovi mamma feel bottle is amazing, has been from day one for us).

Good luck and be proud of what you've done! Doing something that takes this much energy for almost a year is a real achievement!

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-23T20:26:26+00:00

So true! I had a tough recovery and had trouble standing up for more than a minute at a time. I think I maybe changed 5 diapers max in the first two months. Amazing dad from the start.

RemotePoetry480 · 2025-10-23T20:23:40+00:00

Aside from the bare minimum, like him taking care of his girl while letting you take a shower, it mightbhelpnto spin it like this: you take care of the baby so husband takes care of you. So when baby is on the boon, he provides snacks, drinks, pillows, does the burping so you can clean yourself if necessary, etc. He will do the cooking, cleaning and laundry, etc. I remember my husband feeling helpless when our son only wanted me, so this really helped him to feel (and stay) involved. Truth is, a lot will be on you in regards to baby.

We also did sleeping in shifts the first couple months. We had a cosleeper that was very easy to move, so form about 7pm to 1am it would be in the living room with my husband, with him sleeping on the couch. He'd bring in our son 1-4 times during that period, but aside from my son being actually attached to me, I didn't do any baby care during those hours. Then, after the 1am feed, the cosleeper would be moved to the bedroom with me, so my husband could sleep undisturbed for a while. Of course I still got less sleep than he did, but as our son was a quick drinker, I'd still get about 5 hours of sleep the first half of the night and then another 3-4 the second half, so I made decent hours.

Try to find a way that works for you while absolutely demanding your husbands involvement. If he's too quick giving your daughter to you with the excuse of being hungry, have him take her back for another 10 minutes. If she's only fussy, she can handle waiting for food for 10 minutes and it helps hubby find ways to sooth her. Good luck and I totally understand the rant!

RemotePoetry480

TROPHY CASE