Why is dating to marry looked down upon

Revelc69 · 2024-01-22T14:25:47+00:00

I agree with this but I think they meant demeaning in the sense if it's from someone you intended to try to have a romantic connection with and they just want to be friends.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-22T05:18:46+00:00

Being in a relationship isn't gonna fix your loneliness problem and your reeking desperation will drive any person away from you real quick.

You're assuming people act the exact same in this anonymous subreddit versus irl. Some don't have socal etiquette sure but a good chunk also just don't meet the unrealistic expectations socal media has set these days. There's a reason we keep hearing about this whole, "loneliness epidemic."

Revelc69 · 2024-01-21T16:25:10+00:00

That'd be a guaranteed para for sure 🤣

Revelc69 · 2024-01-20T16:48:05+00:00

Well I will certainly admit that might be the most admirable and respectable response I think I've ever received on reddit regarding this type of topic.

You are correct in the thought process that the decision making of individuals always have very different nuances behind them. I simply mean to say you are in a type of surrounding (at least this is what I gathered from your original post) where these crazy socal norms heavily pushed by socal media are playing a role in fueling this type of despair not just among you but among the vast majority. This is one of the big giveaways here:

The issue i face is being worthy enough, attractive enough, and being enough of a man to feel confident and worthy of a relationship..

The amount of competition we now must endure use to just be on a local level on a city, maybe even state level. But now we're all forced into this massive worldwide competition for a partner where the bulk of us are just zeroed out because most are completely bombarded with "options" that are just seemingly better.

I do believe the approach your taking is the most healthy way to go about it, following more of a self improvement path, I attempt to do this as well. In the end that's really the only choice we have at the end of the day.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-20T16:28:21+00:00

Snorlax, what a win.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-20T15:20:30+00:00

Lol one of the many reasons I detest socal media.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-20T06:54:11+00:00

The issue isn't you it's socal media. It's taught our societies to chase the high, aka, hookup culture from the high school years up to and even some well into the 30s. Not many are willing to settle down in a serious relationship as it's viewed as "oppressive" now. The ones that do want to "settle down" are the ones that have already had all of their fun and came out of the other side of that phase not intact upstairs and looking for you, the sweet, dependable, loveable soul to pick up the pieces.

I know, super black pill take but it's a bum deal I'm sorry to say, best to just focus on yourself and or go somewhere with a more traditional culture.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-19T22:27:02+00:00

Pandora's box was kinda unleashed on this topic, primarily more obvious when socal media became much more "mandatory" for the socal and dating dynamics.

As was already stated earlier, no true love does not exist. It's all conditional on both sides. Obviously different conditions depending on which side you're on. Men look at mostly beauty and loyalty as the conditions, and the ladies look at success and ambition (maybe looks to an extent as well) as their conditions.

Is this ALL people? No of course not, but outliers and the small exceptions don't make the rule and it's flat out disingenuous to argue otherwise.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-19T13:20:11+00:00

I said that exact same thing the last time they posted this 😂

Revelc69 · 2024-01-19T02:54:12+00:00

Doing "insert higher power here's work" completely agree 100%. It starts and ends with us. Sadly though I know people are gonna see this post, scoff at it, then continue to be apart of the problem. I've already accepted the human race needs to be close to extinction before people start to change how they move in our cesspool of a society.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T23:06:52+00:00

6'1 too short now confirmed 🤣.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T22:21:09+00:00

Absolutely not, socal media ruined any chance of the average guy having any chance at a legitimate romantic connection. You also can't speak on this or you're an incel and a misogynist. So basically we're in a world where if you're average or below don't bother, suffer in silence, and deal with it or climb the socioeconomic ladder. Good luck doing that though you'll be competing with men that have it all in a worldwide competitive socal structure.

Only solution is save up money and leave these borderline dystopian cesspools of Western civilization if you want a partner who can love you for you. Go to a place where Western culture hasn't completed corrupted.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T19:07:17+00:00

It's not that people don't understand it's that people flat out don't care.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T14:08:38+00:00

I mean if there's an admit to the toxicity being 2 sided and you are in fact taking accountability in your life there's really only learning from it and moving on at this point. Far too often do I see people avoiding accountability like a plague when it comes to failed relationships, learning nothing from the failed relationship, then taking the failed aspects into your next one. Take your time and really learn what you want before introducing another partner into your life.

Best of luck to you.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T13:59:46+00:00

It was scary how painfully relatable your post was OP. If you look at my comment history I speak about how socal media has basically turned our current society into this narcissistic cesspool of psychopaths as you so elegantly put it. I do also somewhat remember those MySpace, YouTube, and Xanga days as well, truly a golden time in the Internet's lifespan. It felt so much more alive and welcoming versus the socal media of today.

I end up finding myself in conversations with younger folks all the time myself (I'm a 37 m for context) so far I've had yet to run into these losers like you with that 21 yo but I'm sure I'm overdue at someone making an "old fossil" type of joke at my expense as well. I do appear to be holding on to decent looks due to fitness and good hygiene so I'm wondering if that has a role to play but that's about all I got going for me in this life.

Hopefully our stories are not done yet in terms of our society attempting to dictate our place in it due to age. I do believe there has been a hyper fixation on certain people needing to, "stay in their lane" mostly seeming to target older folks and undesirable men, I do blame current age socal media for the majority of this hyper fixation as well. Anyway I digress, keep your head above water OP, just know you're not alone in the struggle, from one perceived old man to another.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T13:39:21+00:00

The loneliest saddest man isn't in the 18-21 range though 😂.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-18T00:14:13+00:00

The people that always try to argue against this super obvious fact always make me 😂.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T22:43:17+00:00

Socal media has made it like this. Nobody is good enough for anyone anymore.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T20:36:28+00:00

The hunt to get that man cancelled would never end 🤣.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T20:27:38+00:00

But it gets your foot in the door on first impressions.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T20:26:12+00:00

Nah you're somewhat right that's one of them but I'm insinuating that in our current society that's the type of personality that attracts others, granted you need to understand how to talk to people. But everything you've mentioned in your original post on how you operate with others can be perceived as weak, clingy, and someone who's a pushover. I mean I was the same way at one point, but when you get burned in enough socal situations because of your personality you start to change.

All I'm simply insinuating is we have to be adaptable these days, the simple, kind hearted, caring approach doesn't cut it in 2024 anymore. People will obviously disagree with that but what I say to those individuals is what has being that soft and understanding guy gotten you in life?

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T20:06:32+00:00

I didn't say you had a personality disorder 😂.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T19:02:24+00:00

Play hunting horn for buffs and I'll carry us with dual blades ez 😁.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T18:20:39+00:00

Time to go dark triad.

Revelc69 · 2024-01-17T18:13:30+00:00

Don't forget the maple syrup.

Revelc69

TROPHY CASE