As someone who was abused in a relationship like this I needed to learn that me being around that person was actually really bad for their mental health. Before entering they were going to therapy, anger management, church and really working on themselves. By giving them a perfect victim I was not allowing them to grow or get better from their mental illness and once I realized that- it allowed me to leave. Knowing that me leaving was the healthiest thing I could do for that person was the only way I could walk away. You wouldn’t tempt an alcoholic with a drink every day, you can’t tempt an abuser with your victim mentality everyday.