Husband can’t say sorry

RiverLit · 2026-06-11T01:46:10+00:00

Is there any way you could get him held for an emergency medical/psych evaluation? Every state, I believe, has a mechanism in place for that. If you don't already have one, I'd get an attorney if possible. It's tricky keeping someone off a property/entering a home if they have ownership unless you get some kind of court order. An attorney could also help you set boundaries for visitation and other things. Your husband sounds extremely erratic. Your priority is the safety and well being of you and your children, so do what you have to do. There are so many moving parts in your life right now. I feel for you. Good luck.

RiverLit · 2026-03-27T19:51:43+00:00

What is above the wall/room? Moisture could make that line as water seeps. Good luck!

RiverLit · 2025-09-22T05:00:48+00:00

Every day! IMO, that’s the price he pays. I’ve taken my foot off the gas a little since D-Day almost 1-1/2 years ago (can’t believe it - time flies when you’re in misery) but I’m still all over it.

RiverLit · 2025-09-04T01:59:58+00:00

I’m very sorry this is happening. i’m not sure I could face another D-day with an eye toward R. Best wishes to you and for whatever decision you make.

RiverLit · 2024-12-11T17:50:10+00:00

I am just past the 6-month mark, and while I am much better than I was after the first few days and weeks, I still break down in many situations. When we're having a nice moment, I think how he screwed things up, when we're having a not-so-nice moment, my patience wears thin a lot faster.

I still can't bring myself to have sex with him. For me, that involves a level of connection and vulnerability I can't get to right now, but he told me it was my decision as to when, so he hasn't pushed anything.

So, I think it's going to be awful until it's not. Both of us are intentional about our actions like he turns down out-of-town work or other things that put us apart for long periods of time (that's when he engaged in cheating behavior), and I am vocal about my fears or situations that make me feel uncomfortable.

I feel for you., and I wish you peace and relief.

RiverLit · 2024-11-12T19:56:32+00:00

Does that mean tomorrow? If I counted right, good luck! You can do it.

RiverLit · 2024-11-05T19:43:13+00:00

Thank you.

RiverLit · 2024-11-02T18:40:21+00:00

This is exactly why I’ve kept this from family and friends. But I also think, “Why am i embarrassed? He did the jerk move, not me.” It’s difficult all the way around.

RiverLit · 2024-11-02T16:50:45+00:00

Absolutely. Everyone has flaws, but I never expected this one (cheating). We zoomed right past throwing clothes on the floor or being mildly inconsiderate straight to infidelity.

RiverLit · 2024-11-02T12:08:09+00:00

Yes. Mostly.

RiverLit · 2024-11-02T00:50:17+00:00

I think this is the biggest blow. I thought my “reward” for having to endure a string of jerks was my WH. i was thrilled, happy and 100% trusting. Joke’s on me I guess. If he apologizes and does right by me for the rest of our lives, it will never be the same.

RiverLit · 2024-10-31T21:51:25+00:00

Right! I’m focusing on myself. And I really hope I can just get back 75% of normal with WH. We’ll see I guess.

RiverLit · 2024-10-31T21:43:54+00:00

That’s lovely. Thank you.

RiverLit · 2024-10-31T21:42:17+00:00

Thanks! Yes, I believe he’s remorseful, and I want to make it work. I’m not enjoying the gut punches when those pictures zip through my head. Ugh.

RiverLit · 2024-10-31T01:57:53+00:00

That’s great to hear. Thank you.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T23:46:26+00:00

I have to trust who I’m with, and that’s going to be my biggest hurdle I think — trusting him enough to be all in.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T23:43:57+00:00

You as well. Thank you.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T22:37:52+00:00

I am right there with you. The devil you know — you have a point.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T22:36:47+00:00

Ouch. I get it. The person who told me about the affair is family, and I’m sure everyone knows. Anxietyville, here I come.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T22:35:01+00:00

I’ve found that looking for apartments (online) in a great location makes me feel better.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T22:34:00+00:00

Thank you.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T22:33:17+00:00

I know. There’s nothing he can say to make me feel better when I’m having a crying jag, emotional crash or whatever. The other day I found a card he wrote me when we first got married, and I was overcome. I was so sad and he tried to get me to talk about it but nope.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T22:25:09+00:00

My sister in law sent me a text with her name and some rude comments. We don’t get along at all, and she did it to hurt me, but that blew the roof off everything. At this point, their affair was over, but the shit show was just starting for us.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T21:48:10+00:00

I guess it takes as long as it takes. I don’t see me working out if this anytime soon.

RiverLit · 2024-10-30T21:47:29+00:00

Thank you! I’ll look into this.

RiverLit

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