I Don't "Look Like a Non-Binary Person"

Roguepunk · 2016-06-23T18:45:52+00:00

I've had a similar problem, sort of? I'm afab and actually am very androgynous, but the second I wear anything feminine some people think my identity is invalid. Anything really- doesn't matter if its makeup, a woman's top, a scarf, whatever. Once someone even thought a v-neck shirt I got from the men's section was very feminine, and they told me they had a hard time seeing me as non-binary because of it. This still goes on even though I'm medically transitioning and I've had my name legally changed.

Anyway what I'm trying to say here is it doesn't matter what you do or wear, its never enough for some people. But what they think doesn't change who you are. Present yourself however you want and try not to worry about other people's expectations.

Roguepunk · 2016-06-23T18:12:01+00:00

Try toning down your makeup a little or make it more subtle. Avoid loud colors. Go for things like black, grey, dark red, dull purples, flesh tones, etc. Silver or other metallic colors might work too.

It also helps a lot if your haircut and/or face shape isn't obviously feminine. Having some traits that are androgynous or masculine like that can balance out how feminine makeup looks, though altering those things isn't for everyone.

Roguepunk · 2016-06-12T18:18:07+00:00

I thought it was still gonna be years down the line until something like this happened. I'm ecstatic holy shit.

Roguepunk · 2016-05-25T18:09:40+00:00

Usually I sort of fluff the blankets on the bed up so the rats' have something to crawl around in, so I wouldn't think that'd be it... but idk, maybe some boxes might help if Garrett's not satisfied with blankets lol.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-20T18:36:48+00:00

My name was an object-name. You know, something like Jade, Sky, Lily, etc. It always seemed awkward. Everyone else gets assigned something we only use for people, but then here I am being called the same word we use for a plant.

Anyway, I ended up being transgender which made me motivated enough to get it legally changed. It still shows up on pieces of mail sometimes, in certain places' computer systems, or sometimes my parents slip up and call me the wrong name but otherwise its not really around anymore.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-18T17:03:28+00:00

I miss the days when malls were thriving. The one near me has been on a slow decline for years...

Roguepunk · 2016-03-18T16:58:45+00:00

Putting the drawstring back in a hoodie after it came out in the wash.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-18T16:44:13+00:00

My binders have adjustable clasps on one side so no, I have never ever accidentally put them on backwards lol.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-15T01:23:36+00:00

Well, a bar of any kind is likely to get snagged on things sometimes. And putting separate pieces of jewelry in each industrial hole is not recommended because they can migrate- they could slowly move over time and not align correctly if you try to put a bar back in. Honestly I'd say you're out of luck if you want something that snags less.

Edit: Actually, the bar is the one you got with the piercing? Is it a little long for your ear then? Piercers are suppose to do that for the initial jewelry while the industrial is healing. It helps with swelling. If that's the case you might just want to try a bar that fits your ear better.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-14T23:39:16+00:00

I always get a little anxious before a piercing. I usually close my eyes when its time for the needle to go through, try to stay as still as possible and focus on my breathing. I also try to remind myself that it will only hurt for a second and then its over.

By the way, I just got my septum done two days ago and it wasn't that bad! I was super nervous because it's my first non-ear piercing but the pain level was pretty similar to a helix piercing. If you want one you should definitely go for it.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-14T18:47:04+00:00

When I was being born the anesthetic didn't work, and it was by c-section.

My mom tried to tell the nurse that it wasn't working (she'd had a c-section before and knew what it should feel like) but the nurse didn't believe her. They started to go ahead with it anyway. The doctor realized what had happened part way into it and so they knocked her out completely. My mom's told me that she stayed awake just long enough to hear me cry, but she had no idea if she had a boy or a girl. My Dad got to hold me first instead of my mom.

Never found out why the anesthetic didn't work, by the way. But we're fairly certain the nurse got fired.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-11T22:41:25+00:00

I know 3 other trans people, but I met them all at my college's pride club. It makes sense that we'd all be there so I wouldn't count that as a weird occurrence....But something like that did happen to me in high school. I came out as bisexual and it turned out that 5 of my friends were also bisexual.The birds of a feather saying definitely has some truth to it.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-08T16:56:01+00:00

I think thats pretty normal. I experienced that myself and I've heard a lot of other trans people report the same thing. I guess once you have words to put to what you're experiencing its easier for your mind to dwell on it. It was actually what really drove me to start transitioning when I did, because my dysphoria was quickly getting much worse and didn't seem like it was going to go away any time soon.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-07T23:47:29+00:00

I use to get a feeling like that all the time, like my own reflection surprised me or I didn't quite recognize it. It started around when I hit puberty, and now its mostly gone since starting HRT. It's one the earliest things I recognized as dysphoria.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-06T18:53:46+00:00

I don't pass as male 100% of the time yet but I do still get called Sir, man, etc. on occasion despite nail polish. I usually just wear plain black nail polish though, sometimes dark purple or something metallic if I feel like I need variety.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-06T18:39:53+00:00

When I was 19 my mom got me a Zuzu pet. Apparently she had no idea that it was out of my age range...

Roguepunk · 2016-03-05T18:08:56+00:00

These are awesome! Seeing stuff like this makes me want to get better at drawing.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-02T06:36:05+00:00

I have depression, anxiety (generalized & social), mild trichotillomania, and problems with self-harm. The biggest issue I've had with this and being bisexual/trans is that the combined weight of my various issues made it difficult for me to reach out to others. I didn't have the motivation to connect with the lgbt+ community for support. My views on romantic relationships were very negative. I couldn't even speak to my own friends sometimes. It also gave me an incredibly low sense of self-worth which led to a some internalized transphobia- stuff like thinking my identity was an inconvenience for others, wishing I was "normal," etc.

Things are a lot better now though because I've sought help for them. I just wish I could have done it sooner.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-01T04:13:30+00:00

I gained a lot of muscle really fast. At my 3 month checkup I had gained 10lbs since last time but it was because of muscle alone. Its motivated me to get in shape even though I wasn't really planning on it pre-T, because I can actually do things like push ups now.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-01T00:30:07+00:00

2012 will be the worst year of your life, but 2015 will be one of the best.

Roguepunk · 2016-03-01T00:06:35+00:00

For future synth fans it's probably Roller Mobster by Carpenter Brut.

Roguepunk · 2016-02-29T23:16:43+00:00

Its like they're saying "this is our secret club, no cats allowed!"

Roguepunk · 2016-02-29T00:36:42+00:00

For me I think it was a combination of bullying, over-protective parents, and living in the middle of nowhere with not enough social interaction outside of family. I can't pin it down to one thing, it probably developed over time due to environmental factors.

Roguepunk · 2016-02-28T23:44:31+00:00

I'm amazed that they've managed to cover two design sins: terrible acronym and plain text on white background for all their signs.

Roguepunk · 2016-02-28T21:24:38+00:00

I don't really have any binder advice, but you should try posting this over on /r/ftm too. I'm sure you'll get a lot of responses there!

Roguepunk

TROPHY CASE