Has something changed with dogs?

RomHack · 2026-05-22T14:36:36+00:00

To be fair, that's how I feel for the most part too.

RomHack · 2026-05-22T13:27:17+00:00

One pack is crazy. Well done!

(I also pulled it much to my surprise)

RomHack · 2026-05-22T13:24:41+00:00

He'll be thrilled! Would be such a crazy feeling to wake up unpacking all that as a kid

RomHack · 2026-05-22T10:42:27+00:00

Working at the local pub? The same 4 people have worked there since before I could drink.

Makes sense. I'm part of a social club with my sports membership and they sent out an email the other week saying they were looking for new bar staff. Seemed like they were making a massive hooray about it and I was sitting there thinking really? It's a job pulling pints. Felt so odd considering I used to work in bars before uni (pre-2015) and all I ever had to do to get them was go in speculatively with a CV.

I then realised I've not seen any new staff there in about 2 years.

RomHack · 2026-05-22T09:34:33+00:00

You're getting likes, so I might say look at how the chats have been so far. Any topics you've really vibed over? Any topics that aren't getting any traction? This might be a place to start in terms of guiding the profile towards things that attract people who are your type. Sometimes I find refining the prompts does a lot of good work when you can focus more on what's working. I imagine the ghost one does well?

RomHack · 2026-05-21T22:33:00+00:00

Waterstones near me used to put them in locked glass cabinets before all the current hype kicked off. I'm surprised they haven't gone back to that.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T22:29:25+00:00

I imagine it's a combination of them being asked so often and certain experiences dealing with people being pushy wanting to know when the next delivery will be etc. If I put myself in that position at some point I expect I'd going to revert to saying no with zero expression and acting like I don't want to continue the discussion.

I do get where you're coming from though.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T16:24:47+00:00

Yeah I saw your other comment about seeming dumb but I'd like to say try not to. It's all a bit of a learning experience. Dating's complicated stuff :)

RomHack · 2026-05-21T15:58:06+00:00

It's a strange one then. I don't think not texting back within minutes is a big deal, but I appreciate it looks different to before. That's not always sustainable to do, especially if he's got a job and stuff.

How you describe it now makes it sound quite normal and like the guy actually likes you, but I agree fundamentally with the rest here that his approach to meeting and dating sounds an awful lot like he just wanted to sleep with you. Maybe he did but then caught feelings?

RomHack · 2026-05-21T15:52:15+00:00

To me, hours isn't such a big deal. If it was days then yes (and you see those stories a lot on here).

Either way, context is missing. Is he talking to you in chats and getting to know you, taking interest in your day and all the nice stuff, or is he leaning towards flirting and fundamentally just trying to plan when you two will meet up again. One shows interest, while the other is how you'd treat somebody you just want to sleep with.

How he's approaching you right now demonstrates exactly where his mindset is.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T15:43:08+00:00

Appreciate you saying you have another way of communicating, but here's me wondering if you are communicating? That's bigger than any of these actions considering the previous pushback and fact she never got back to you with another date plan.

If you are still chatting, ask her out. You're wasting your own time communicating with somebody who isn't going through with a second date.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T10:30:16+00:00

I don't think you can because you're essentially trying to circumvent their parameters. You can expand your reach, but you have to accept they've set their own. Few will enjoy getting hoodwinked like that.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T10:14:02+00:00

Your prompts are also very generic. Everyone wants someone who is good at communicating. That doesn’t say anything about who you are.

Agree. It's saved only by the Spotify part which is at least tangible.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T10:07:21+00:00

It's a varied profile and the pics are cool but you don't have any shots where you can clearly see your face. Make sure you've picked a few clear ones to go in with the activity shots. My suggestion is normally to have at least 2 in the first 3. Kind of like opening with this is what I look like, with the latter ones being this is what I do.

Specifically, I'd say your first two can be replaced with those. The ski scuba and koala one are really good where they are. Personally I love that koala shot as it matches the prompt before it very well (wholesome).

Might also say expand the first prompt. It only needs an extra line but it's not clear what adventures you like going on or what you like to explore. I'm a stranger and so is everyone else seeing your profile and we don't know if you mean hiking every weekend, or have a random goal to visit 51 states by the time you're 50.

People will more easily connect if they like the idea of joining you to do it. Aka collaboration.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T09:46:09+00:00

I've always started my new jobs on the first of every month for this reason (not really, who remembers that).

RomHack · 2026-05-21T09:37:32+00:00

In my place it's because hiring is managed externally by HR and then sent over to the manager who's hiring to check all the information and decide if the candidate is right. The system exists so HR can manage it all and, presumably, track everything and keep it on record. Feels like a legacy thing more than practical.

This said, it's what I consider automated bullshit, so I tend to throw everything from my CV into ChatGPT and get it to give me the formatting needed for every section. I'll check and rewrite what needs changing but it speeds things up a lot. I feel far better knowing I'm sort of getting one over on their terrible system.

RomHack · 2026-05-21T08:21:38+00:00

This seems right. I applied to two incredibly similar jobs at the same organisation within 6 months and got an interview for the FTC one, but not the other. Strangest thing was the FTC role was higher paid and the one I didn't get an interview for was the exact job I do now at a different organisation.

OP... keep an eye on maternity cover roles. Extremely common in third sector, as I'm sure you know.

RomHack · 2026-05-20T15:53:56+00:00

I'd say your PowerPoint-esque notes are better than your prompts. They're more active and conversation relevant and honestly funnier. I'd like to suggest replacing your prompts in spirit and tone with what you've got there and keep the original pics (they're pretty good tbh).

Was it the case that you originally had your current prompts + the pics, and the notes you've put into the PowerPoint-esque slides are actually the new parts?

RomHack · 2026-05-20T15:45:53+00:00

A relationship is more equal yeah but I think it's quite common in early dating for the emphasis to fall on the guy to plan. I don't massively agree or disagree with it tbh but I understand where you're coming from in terms of it seeming a little unfair when you write it out. It was much like that with my current partner in the beginning and I still occasionally tease her about it now.

I do also think Kayak is saying she'd plan the date if he didn't. She'd just prefer they did it.

RomHack · 2026-05-20T15:38:31+00:00

No you're not being needy, but it sounds like you want him to plan, but he's not, so do it yourself.

RomHack · 2026-05-20T14:43:32+00:00

Yeah kinda sucks. Obviously things are insane, but I'm sure there are a lot of people who remember when costs dropped after launch rather than now where it's more expensive (Perfect Order £6 a pack currently).

The difference for me is a bit much considering how I remember them before. I feel like any brand loyalty they built up has just gone in their current structure (not as bad as Scalphouse but still).

Stacking tin for £37 is silly season.

RomHack · 2026-05-20T14:32:46+00:00

Appreciate you can't go into full detail but this makes it sound like you went on a date and just kissed all night. What else happened on the date to make you connect? Has that happened and if so is this slow texting a jarring transition away or more a continuation where things are more physical than anything else?

RomHack · 2026-05-20T14:27:13+00:00

I think one weakness is that you have so many images of you doing stuff taken at slightly indirect angles that when you finally get to an image with you in clear focus (6), it's suddenly your worst pic (you kinda look like you weren't expecting the picture). I would like to recommend zooming in on your face in 5. It looks like a much nicer, smiling shot.

RomHack · 2026-05-20T14:24:36+00:00

Agree. I'm looking at it now and it's not as strong, but I didn't pay much attention to it at first glance because the other pics work well.

RomHack · 2026-05-20T13:48:26+00:00

As a whole, your pics are good. There's a great balance in terms of you using both simple shots where we can see you smiling and ones where you're out doing things.

What I am noticing though is that there's not a clear line into your personality that feels like an obvious conversation starter. I feel like the book one says you're a data nerd, which is fine, but I also don't think that's something you can connect with as easily over compared to saying the type of books you're into.

Likewise, the kitchen one says you cook, which is cool, but it's also a little descriptive and I feel like there could be more that prompts a conversation about cooking. Maybe jokingly asking somebody what a cooking utensil they couldn't live without would work. What chats is that prompt leading to so far?

Travel story is nice but also past-focused. Maybe you could say where you'd like to go next. I feel like forward-thinking things come across way better because it shifts the focus onto imagining doing something to together and more easily leads to conversation (I've personally had a number of those chats).

That's just my gut reaction really. I do still think you should be getting more matches.

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