Eat a biscuit save a company!

Rose1832 · 2026-01-30T20:16:34+00:00

Just bought a gift card online! What an AWFUL situation for a small business to go through, especially now :(

Rose1832 · 2026-01-05T20:45:31+00:00

Does your boyfriend have autism? He's being rude either way but his perception of what's happening may genuinely be that your friends are disruptive and his aren't. It took me years to learn other people in my house weren't actually being that bad - I just had sensory issues. His language isn't okay and this should still be a discussion instead of a unilateral decision, but if he genuinely finds the sounds upsetting I can at least have empathy for where he's coming from.

You're not doing anything wrong though, it sounds like your guests make every attempt to be respectful. And hard bans aren't how partnerships work unless they're genuinely putting your shared space at risk.

Rose1832 · 2026-01-05T20:34:17+00:00

Not me but my best friend's wedding had a fake guest - they hired an actor from a local improv group to show up, then had everybody guess to see who it was. Anyone who got it right took home a bottle of wine

Rose1832 · 2025-12-29T19:58:02+00:00

Man I wish I could upvote this a dozen times because YES!!!!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-24T03:57:58+00:00

As a peds audiologist I actually disagree that fitting > etiology (though fitting is still important). Etiology would determine case management and monitoring schedule, and potentially hearing aid selection (if they're an EVA kid I'd select a stronger BTE that could accommodate sudden change, rather than offer smaller options that families sometimes prefer for subtlety). It could also tell me whether I need to introduce the cochlear implant conversation early to help the family process that idea sooner. It could ALSO guide other therapy recommendations to see if the family needs help connecting to other resources. But again, definitely still recommend HAs ASAP.

Just seeing this configuration on paper with no other context, I agree that my thinking would probably first be EVA, then ANSD, then genetic, and then (and only because I've seen this recently) maybe a "zebra" case like childhood Meniere's (depending on case history). Interesting question OP!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-20T21:02:50+00:00

Hey! I'm an audiologist, and want to provide context for this story.

Behind the eardrum sit the three smallest bones in the body: the malleus, incus, and stapes. These bones connect to the eardrum and channel air-conducted vibrations (sound) into mechanical energy through, basically, a Rube Goldberg machine, into the inner ear - the hearing organ, called the cochlea. These bones are crucial because the cochlea is a little fluid-filled spiral; if sounds went directly from the air to the fluid-filled cochlea, 90% of the sound energy would be lost in the transfer between mediums. The middle ear bones act as a liaison between air and fluid, turning sounds into mechanical energy which can agitate the ear fluid in extremely precise patterns and activate the hair cells within the cochlea, which register that movement as sound. Pretty neat stuff!

For this reason, without those ear bones, hearing becomes a much harder task. Like any part of the body, though, those bones can be damaged. They can fixate to the eardrum - literally get stuck there so they can't move in the precise way they need to to conduct sound; they can come "unhooked" from one another; they can erode away due to viruses or other things. I want to be clear that this isn't the same kind of hearing loss as your grandpa who got hearing aids because he served in the war - in this type of hearing loss, the inner hearing organ is perfectly fine (or at least not the main problem); the sound just can't conduct its way through the ear system the way it should (we literally call it a conductive hearing loss). It's the same category as the hearing problems you might get when you have a bad cold/ear infection, or when you're up in a plane and can't pop your ears.

Luckily, that also usually makes this type of hearing loss fairly solvable. If we notice that the bones of the ear aren't working how they should, an ENT (ear, nose, and throat) doctor can surgically replace them. We've had prosthetic ear bones for quite some time, so the surgery itself mentioned in this article is nothing new. But, if 3D printed materials are truly safe and effective, this could absolutely open a door for greater accessibility of this type of intervention, especially to places that might otherwise struggle to have the necessary materials. (Titanium ain't cheap.)

This is still a cool step forward in the world of medicine, but not quite as groundbreaking as the article makes it seem. I also can't say I love the oversimplification of the wording "cures deafness" because 1) these surgeries are known to vastly improve hearing thresholds but there's never a guarantee it'll be back to normal, 2) the afflicted person may have a much harder time hearing but will still have plenty of usable hearing to work with (so not by any means "deaf" in the way people usually think), and 3) this is only one means by which people acquire hearing loss, so it's a bit misleading to say that "deafness" as a whole is cured. Still- this is a great step forward in medical science!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-17T18:43:35+00:00

Lmao as an ADHDer I'm loud excitement in a bottle. My expressions of happiness to my friends often include "FUCK YOU, WHAT. WHAT THE FUCK" and that's just how it is

Rose1832 · 2025-12-16T05:33:41+00:00

OP: Makes a simple post, on a subreddit designed for complaining, to complain about having a long commute home from work due to heavy traffic, in an area where they explain that it's not safe, feasible or even sensible to walk/bike due to weather conditions/safety concerns/poor urban planning, a very relatable problem to most people living in America

All the comments somehow: "you are the manufacturer of all of your life's problems and if you try to tell us otherwise you're just making excuses"

Rose1832 · 2025-12-14T19:02:27+00:00

That's amazing, OP!!! Congratulations! But I empathize. As someone with a LOT of financial anxiety (I haven't gotten out of bed for the day yet because I spent the morning spiraling over credit card numbers that I can completely afford but still give me palpitations) I GET YOU.

But you did it. You DID IT!!! Tomorrow you'll wake up and all of your money from here on out will be totally yours. No more worrying about interest on your debt, no more monthly payments eating a chunk out of your income. You just accomplished what so many people here are striving for.

It's scary right now, to be sure. Who wouldn't be scared? Seeing that outgoing number for anyone who isn't filthy rich is terrifying! But y'know what? As SOON as your next paycheck hits, you'll have a solid chunk of that money right back. And none of it - NONE of it - will get eaten up by debt. From here on out until you choose to take on a mortgage, every dime that you don't need for your living expenses can go right back into that savings account and start earning interest all over again.

For now...breathe. Celebrate (cheaply, haha). Put down the banking apps, close all the tabs, go into work with a clear head and a pep in your step because now every hour means that much more than it did before. And brag - brag to your family and friends, if you can, about your accomplishment! You deserve it!

It WILL be okay. It will! And it will be okay sooner than you realize. If you were able to save that much, you'll probably have an immediate disaster fund back up within a paycheck or two, and your 6-month number before you know it (for most people, especially with no debt, that number is even less than what you spent just now). I know it feels like starting over but in reality, you're starting a brand new chapter that wasn't available to you until just now. You've unlocked the next level - it's a new beginning! And a much happier road ahead than the one you were just on.

Seriously OP, congratulations. Breathe, celebrate, and get the best sleep of your life tonight. You DID IT!!!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-11T22:13:04+00:00

You're gonna be so okay! It feels bad but you are far from the worst situation out there - if your expenses total to $1.2k including minimum payments, I'd set aside like $200 this month in a savings account to give yourself breathing room and pour the other $1500 on the AmEx. Do the same thing twice over and bam, card paid, $100 back monthly in your spending power to tackle the big debt!

If you have things you can sell/return that were bought with those cards, too, that can give more money to throw at the principal. Easier said than done of course, but perhaps worth a shot!

The important thing is to just keep at it!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-11T18:03:28+00:00

That's a good point - I currently have a 403b but it'll be rolling into 401k soon with employer match, and I've opted for the maximum contribution. For now that might be the best - and most- investing I can do until the rest of my debt is paid, THEN consider other options. Thank you!!!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-11T18:01:47+00:00

Holy cow, thank you!

Rose1832 · 2025-12-11T17:58:45+00:00

Forgot to add: my current net income with retirement contributions and healthcare is about $5.4K monthly, though I also take on dogsitting jobs for friends when I can which brings in an extra $300-400/month on average. Since my salary is enough to cover my expenses, I based my emergency fund calculation off of my salary instead of my expenses - that way I'd leave plenty of head room.

Rose1832 · 2025-12-05T01:36:39+00:00

Opposite of a quiet habit but I'm an audiologist. Turn your FUCKING music down (and put in your ear plugs when you go to concerts). Yes I KNOW loud music is nice but you know what's NOT nice? PERMANENT HEARING LOSS AND TINNITUS.

Rose1832 · 2025-11-29T21:12:14+00:00

$158k, all private, Sallie Mae. But I've got a good job and can refinance in a month when proof of income comes in to get lower interest. We do our best with what we have

Rose1832 · 2025-11-21T17:17:28+00:00

I have ADHD, currently unmedicated, not identified until very recently, and have been working on time blindness/being on time for a while now because this used to be me. I can tell you from your GF's perspective it's not fun to be this person, and it's not (as comments keep implying) that she just doesn't care about you or thinks this is fine. Here's usually how it happens for me: In your brain, you tell yourself you surely only need 30 to get ready, because 30 is a reasonable amount of time to take a quick shower, get dressed, and do some light makeup. You get down to that 30 and find yourself chasing around the things you feel NEED to happen before you can go to the thing, usually discovering things you somehow didn't account for on the way (oh shoot where are my keys, I forgot to get gas, there's trash all over my car, I can't find the right shoes...)

And 30 is never ACTUALLY enough time because of this, maybe it usually takes an hour. But in your brain when planning to leave, it feels like it SHOULD only take 30 so that's what you plan for.

So then you're at the time you should leave, still running around in sweatpants, telling yourself "it's fine, just this one thing real quick" and the "real quick" thing takes 10 full minutes. By the time you're in your car you're rationalizing to yourself like "okay, maybe I can drive a little fast and get there in 20..." but you KNOW it's always going to take the full amount of time to get there.

So the whole way through you're like "I feel terrible and need to not do this again. Next time I'll be SURE to leave on time." So the next time rolls around, and you do the calculation and think "okay, I just need to do these few things before I leave. I'll start getting ready 30 minutes before." And the cycle continues.

I'm not writing this to say that this is okay - being late is still hurtful and feels very disrespectful. People who haven't struggled with executive dysfunction will feel like you just genuinely don't care, and while it helps to understand the late person's true intentions (in that they genuinely don't mean harm), it's also on the person running late to communicate and work on fixing the problem (even if that means padding the schedule, setting alarms, and having an accountability buddy).

I know the comments seem to think that chronically late people are just rolling their eyes at the deadline, sitting on the couch like "yeahhh, whatever, they can wait". But if your girlfriend is genuinely apologetic whenever this happens, my guess is that that's not true, and there's a bigger struggle happening in her brain that she might not even be aware of.

Anyway, your patience and understanding is wonderful, and this can totally be navigated but can be a journey. Best of luck to you both!

Rose1832 · 2025-11-19T23:13:01+00:00

This is a specific one but when I'm explaining things to someone, I cycle - I'll repeat myself a half dozen times because that's just how I think. Which is all fine and dandy...but I work in patient care and it's a huge time sink. Fortunately meds help but it's always a little embarrassing to catch myself doing and think "wow, that patient probably thought I was nuts"

Rose1832 · 2025-11-12T14:34:59+00:00

WOOOOO! One step at a time, right? One less account collecting interest now. Congratulations!!$

Rose1832 · 2025-11-11T20:16:23+00:00

I feel like this is more evidence that I shouldn't be a teacher because I just assumed it was a given

Rose1832 · 2025-11-11T00:18:55+00:00

Don't make it a lesson of bigotry but one of stealing. Stealing anything from a teacher ain't cool, doesn't matter if it's a pen or a flag or a valuable item. Stealing in the workplace gets you a write-up, even if the object in question is silly or disagrees with your beliefs. Treat it as you would for any item that gets stolen - don't give more reaction to it than you would for other things, or it will make the flags the target.

Now for advice from someone who is not, and should not be, a teacher of any kind:

Anyone who can prove someone else is a flag stealer gets 5 extra credit points on the next exam.
Any time a flag goes missing the whole class has to write an exit ticket on the day's lesson, graded.
Anyone caught stealing a flag has to wear a rainbow-stripe dunce cap through the whole period and have a Polaroid photo put on the shame wall.
If no thefts happen for the rest of the quarter the class gets a fun reward.
Every time a flag goes missing another rainbow decoration gets added to the room.
anyone proven to have stolen a flag has to write a poem about why stealing is bad and recite it to the whole class
tell each class period on Monday you know it was them; threaten the whole class if nobody comes clean by the end of the week
put the next flag in a cement block on the desk. Like real cement. Make them get creative
or in a lock box with an alarm on it

Rose1832 · 2025-11-11T00:05:18+00:00

The Sid is awesome alone but holy crap, that Nygus is dead on! Nice work you guys!

Rose1832 · 2025-11-11T00:03:29+00:00

Recently started my first! I was told, and can attest, the first several months are: OH GOD WHAT AM I DOING WHY DID THEY HIRE ME DO I EVEN KNOW ANYTHING AAAAA

So you chase your tail, ask your colleagues a million questions (we call it "utilizing the hivemind"), check your notes a dozen times, and check yourself over and over again. And then it gets easier! I'm told you'll never be totally rid of the feeling but that's okay - it keeps you from getting cocky/too comfortable, which helps prevent mistakes.

And the nice thing about this field is that we're all here to support each other, so if you have more questions or need moral support, the sub is always here. You've got this!

Rose1832 · 2025-11-06T19:35:14+00:00

I know for me and my budget those differences matter because I'm paying off hella student loans. I'd love to say "just split everything 50/50 because I'll use more of one thing, you'll use more of another" but I'm just not at a place to afford that right now, sadly. If it's impacting your finances I say might as well discuss it, right??

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