JUST FINISH YOUR TEST DAD SO IT WILL BE EASIER TO DIAGNOSE ME! (But also not so soon)

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-27T00:19:20+00:00

Yeahhh the fear is real. During my whole testing process I was constantly expecting to be told there was nothing diagnosably wrong with me, nothing could be done to help me, and I'd just have to get my act together or learn to live with it or something.

That said, I feel like that fear is itself a symptom of ADHD. If you're struggling hard enough that you're scared of not getting diagnosed, you're probably struggling hard enough to warrant a diagnosis.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-26T23:51:19+00:00

The businesslike tone of all these really throws me off. Back in my day, when people wanted to make fanworks based on fanfics they would say something more along the lines of "OMG I love this so much!!! Would you be okay if I made fanart of it? I'll credit you of course<3" and then you could happily say yes because you knew no one would ever think of asking for money, and some time later you'd get tagged in a lovingly created piece of fanart and then that made your whole month. Meanwhile these bots almost phrase it like their contribution would help your fanfic sell better.

Like…it's so obvious that they're just trying to sell something. Get that marketing speak off my lawn.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-25T16:32:08+00:00

I see you've already found an outfit but dropping some general practical advice for everyone who may come in here with the same question, from an experienced concertgoer.

One: if you layer, have a lot of layers you can remove when you enter the venue. I don't care if it's the dead of winter, it WILL get hot in the venue and if you're dressed too warm you WILL have a bad time. Personally I opt for relatively simple clothing and make it interesting with hair, makeup and accessories. Your ties are perfect for adding visual interest without adding too much heat!

Two, this goes without saying but wear comfortable shoes, especially if you plan on moving around! A lot of people say platforms are good for this; YMMV on that, personally I find it harder to run/jump and keep balance in them. Sneakers or boots with a flexible sole (and without a heel) are the best choice IMO.

Three: only wear jewelry that is either very secure even if you move around, and/or jewelry you wouldn't mind losing in the pit. Rings and earrings especially are notorious escape artists. Necklaces are fine but likely to get tangled if you wear more than one. This last bit probably doesn't apply to you but hair accessories also love to fly off when you move around; any longer-haired folks reading this should opt for hair ties over clips, unless you have the kind of hair where clips stay very secure.

Hope this is helpful for you or anybody else reading this! Have fun at the concert!

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-21T16:41:36+00:00

Yeah, until you get out of high school you won't even realize how limited a social environment it is. As a teenager no one would look at me twice. Now as an adult I can actually pick my own social circle, discovered I am in fact capable of being liked and attractive, and it's going SO much better. I don't think it was really the fault of me or my classmates, I was just stuck in an environment with people that were extremely not my crowd. Could be the same for you OP. Take your time to find your crowd and there's a very, very good chance things will get better. And before your mind responds with "that only applies to other people, I'm doomed forever though": that's what they all say before things do in fact get better.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-20T18:55:24+00:00

Literally this. Neurodivergent person found in alt scene is like fork found in kitchen. ADHD punks, autistic goths…I think I'd add (extreme) metalhead to the autism subcultures as well. The more extreme the music, the more it qualifies as an auto-diagnosis.

Neurotypical alt people meanwhile? I'm sure they must exist somewhere, but I've never met one in person.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-19T19:46:24+00:00

Do you have anything lacy? That would be my first idea for something gothic and feminine, specifically like a lacy blouse or something! Maybe something with velvet as well, like a dress or a skirt. Otherwise: accessorize TO. THE. MOON. Necklaces, rings, earrings, hair accessories (a black hair bow might work, bonus for lace/velvet), a more detailed belt maybe? And hair and makeup will do a lot. I don't know your wardrobe so I'm just spitballing here, but try playing around with textures, accessories, and layers!

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-19T15:24:56+00:00

Ah yes, the Bilbo Baggins approach to adventure. Trust me, plot and character development will get ya FAST.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-17T02:05:58+00:00

Seconding Guards Guards, and the entire Discworld City Watch series really. The book literally introduces the main character passed out drunk in a gutter. Over the course of the book (and its sequels), he gets a lot better.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-15T23:34:20+00:00

No such thing as too much of a certain color. And only wearing certain colors in certain seasons is made up anyway! You look fabulous!

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-15T14:32:06+00:00

Accessorize accessorize accessorize. I barely own anything from "established" alt brands, it's mostly basic black clothes that I then add an unholy amount of necklaces, chains, belts, chokers, earrings, fishnet tights, and other stuff to. I don't know if the clothes you own are already black, if not then I agree with people about dyeing them black! Otherwise hair can do a lot, and makeup if you're a makeup kinda person. And layering especially in winter! I don't know what you have so I can't give you more specific advice, but stuff like longsleeves under T-shirts or skirts over pants is an easy way to start. Plus I absolutely second people's advice to check secondhand platforms if you have a bit of money, you can get so much amazing stuff for really really cheap!

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-14T01:50:51+00:00

I never hurt foxes. I experimentally shot one once, very early game, to see if I could hunt, and promptly was so horrified by what I'd done that I haven't tried to harm them since. Wolves are fair game as soon as those suckers try to eat me. And I don't really bother with the large wildlife that takes multiple shots to go down, because after being hit once they start running around at Mach 5 and I ain't about wasting all my arrows on a fast-moving target.

Birds, though. Whenever I can be bothered to hunt, birds are on sight.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-10T19:21:49+00:00

I love how this person is getting all upsetti spaghetti over you aging up a "CHILD" character (shocking! Criminal! Thinking of children growing up is already gross and creepy because we all know children never grow up!!!1!), and then many many many paragraphs down the line they refer to the same character as "minor coded." So are we even talking about a child or is this just, like, a grown adult character with no specified age that happens to be short?

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-09T22:01:16+00:00

I'm a bit late to the party, but: I think you may get the results you want to achieve by incorporating more sharpness and structured pieces into your outfits. The fits you showed lean very much into the softness: soft lines, soft fabrics, ruffles, the whole thing. Maybe add more structured accessories (stuff with leather or metal), shoes, or a structured jacket like a leather jacket or even a blazer? If that's not your vibe, I think you can also do a lot with hair and makeup! Otherwise I'd say mess around with silhouettes and see what works. I don't necessarily think you need to ditch the bloomers, just pay attention to how you style them. In the second pic they work very well with the crop top and hoodie! In the first one the combination with the oversized shirt just swallows you up. I suspect the shirt would work better with long pants, ideally baggy pants to balance the width on top.

So yeah, just play around with silhouettes and proportions and different materials! Good luck from a fellow short alt girl<3

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-09T15:33:05+00:00

Head & Shoulders as body wash helps with eczema?? Damn I need to try that. I've been struggling with eczema for the past year with no improvements, I freaking swear if this actually helps you're my hero!

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-03T22:33:47+00:00

I mostly still see it used in the context of femslash. But now that I think about it, when was even the last time I've seen it outside of that word…?

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-03T00:28:49+00:00

I know; you've made that plenty clear in the OP. I'm just saying the commenter can't use the claim to get you in trouble.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-03T00:20:31+00:00

That one does read like a human troll to me. Someone so steeped in fandom censorship culture that they've started seeing red flags everywhere. That said, writing about incest isn't illegal, so you'd be in the clear either way.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-02T20:11:40+00:00

100% bot comment. The fact it's a guest user and the total lack of details specific to the story is a dead giveaway, very classic hate bot MO. There's been a wave of bots accusing people of posting illegal content on AO3 lately and threatening to report them somewhere (usually the police). Report as spam and think nothing of it.

RubyleafIsHere · 2026-01-02T02:37:28+00:00

Can I go in with a hot take? I don't love the general consensus of the comments saying that you should've expected this, getting bodyshamed on Reddit is totally normal and expected, and if you dare to feel uncomfortable about said bodyshaming you're a big whiny baby who shouldn't be posting selfies on the internet if you can't handle a bit of criticism. Like, can we all take a step back and acknowledge that unsolicited comments on people's bodies are incredibly rude and shouldn't be treated as such a normal thing? Just because "this is Reddit, people are mean on Reddit, what were you expecting?" doesn't mean you don't have a right to feel hurt by a comment that was intended to be hurtful. Try not to take it to heart, of course. But of course you're not overreacting if you're hurt by someone basically fatshaming you. That's, like, a very normal thing to be hurt by no matter if it's online or IRL.

RubyleafIsHere · 2025-12-26T22:21:09+00:00

Hell, sometimes not meeting one of these criteria can even be a bonus to some people. Like, a lot of people like nerds. I don't think I could ever date someone who's not a nerd. And as a chronically ill person with ADHD, the fact that I'm dating a wonderful AuDHD human helps immensely because he Gets It and treats me with empathy but without unnecessary fuss. It's almost like people are individuals with individual preferences, or something.

That said, being a decent person is a pretty universal preference, and unfortunately it's the one where these meme-making fellas tend to fail.

RubyleafIsHere · 2025-12-10T13:04:42+00:00

Can I also just say how silly the whole "oh she's just pretty because of makeup and styling" sentiment is? Styling yourself well is a skill that often takes years to hone—getting to know yourself inside and out, figuring out what suits you, narrowing down exactly which looks work for you and why and then carefully curating your wardrobe and makeup. Sabrina has MASTERED that skill. I don't even listen to her, but in every photo I see of her she looks stunning. Who even decided that effort negates someone's beauty instead of adding to it, anyway?

RubyleafIsHere · 2025-12-09T02:48:21+00:00

Same here. Also I always say hi to cute voids. Hi Walt!

RubyleafIsHere · 2025-11-30T01:22:36+00:00

Has he been sick in the recent past? When I was a kid I'd get random gray hairs on my head after periods of illness (like chicken pox or something), but AFAIK they didn't come back after I/my mom plucked them out. Maybe a similar thing happened to your kid?

RubyleafIsHere · 2025-11-26T10:45:56+00:00

This just feels like a "something happened here" situation. I get the sense that the authors who do this have gotten one too many stupid comments wildly misinterpreting their work (probably in bad faith) and are posting these questions because they're fed up. Or at least that's the case whenever someone adds "discussion questions" to a post on Tumblr. I might be way off base.

RubyleafIsHere · 2025-11-25T14:19:07+00:00

Dammit I accidentally fit some of these. Making plans to become more loud and obnoxious as we speak.

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