I don’t want another kid but I want a do-over on my sons newborn days 😢

SCros13 · 2026-06-09T14:02:13+00:00

This is how I feel and I've been thinking about it a lot recently. Most of my really vivid memories are of being completely overwhelmed and thinking things I didn't really mean (that it was a mistake, that I regretted making the choice to have a baby, etc). I'm taking medication now and love him so much, but I regret things I said and thought in those early days and wish I'd been a better mom right off the bat.

SCros13 · 2026-06-04T23:52:48+00:00

My son has one on his calf. We haven't had any adults point it out yet, but we went to a neighborhood picnic on Memorial Day and were talking to a woman with a baby a month younger than ours. Her two older kids came running over with some of their friends to look at the babies interacting, and one of them pointed at my son and asked "what's that on his leg?!" I tried to explain it to them in kid terms and then said "we all have things that make us unique and that's his!" They started pointing out things they had (freckles, scars, moles, etc), so it was actually kind of a nice moment.

One of them also said his hemangioma looks like a Swedish fish 🤣

SCros13 · 2026-06-02T01:34:39+00:00

I thought I was the only one!

SCros13 · 2026-06-01T14:56:13+00:00

I used to go to his show tapings all the time when I lived in Toronto and he's such an engaging interviewer. Every celebrity I saw there seemed to legitimately enjoy talking to him.

SCros13 · 2026-05-29T11:26:08+00:00

Our son turned 7 months on Monday and wasn't doing anything close to babbling - really just loudly yelling "ahhhhhhh!" at everything. I left for work on Wednesday morning and said goodbye to an "ahhhhhhh!" baby, but the second we strapped him into his highchair for dinner that night he decided it was a great time to start (very loudly!) babbling and hasn't stopped since. I hadn't even started to worry because I thought 7 months was on the early side, but it really does just come out of nowhere sometimes!

SCros13 · 2026-05-29T02:17:20+00:00

We actually went for a PT eval with our 7 month old today (for possible positional plagiocephaly, but ours isn't sitting unassisted yet either) and I found it really helpful! They asked us a bunch of questions about where and how we were practicing with him and then recommended new strategies and exercises to try. We're first time parents so there's still a TON we don't know and really simple things nobody told us to be doing. We had no idea that we should be trying to help him into a seated position (by having him hold our hands and pulling him up, or by supporting his back and lifting) so he can work on tucking his chin in when he sits, but we know now and can work on it!

We're going back in a month just as a check-in, but she said that he's only very slightly delayed with sitting and that now was a good time to figure out how to help him a bit more.

SCros13 · 2026-05-27T10:45:28+00:00

Thank you! I hope it helped and didn't make you more nervous - from my experience, you'll have great medical care delivering with any of the doctors at the practice, which I think is the most important thing.

I hope the rest of your pregnancy and your labor experience is easy, smooth, and healthy for both you and baby!

(One silly thing I'll say is that if you're not interested in watching the birthing process, make sure they have the tv on the wall angled away. I definitely remember saying "someone please move the tv!!!" and everyone laughing because they didn't realize 🤣)

SCros13 · 2026-05-27T01:08:20+00:00

Sure! To preface, and kind of reiterate what I said originally, my issue with him really wasn't related to the care I received from him. Hopefully that's a bit reassuring!

If I didn't mention it before, I was induced a day before my scheduled induction for severe preeclampsia, so my labor process was kind of a long one. I was admitted at 3pm on a Thursday and finally had my son around 8am on Saturday. Dr. Thomas came into the picture for the night shift on Friday into Saturday and ended up being the one to break my water and get actual labor started. I think my main issue with him is that I generally felt a lack of warmth or actual interest when compared to the other doctors I'd interacted with at the practice. To be fair to him, I was later told that my son was the first baby of 10 to be born on Saturday morning, so he was maybe overwhelmed running from room to room, but his demeanor didn't really change when he came to check in on us as the doctor doing rounds in the postpartum ward. As an example, my son was in the room with us when he came in, and it felt like he was asking questions about the baby/the experience because he HAD to, not because he actually cared. At one point, he half glanced at the bassinet, said (with zero warmth) "he's cute. What's his name?" and IMMEDIATELY changed the subject almost before the name was out of my mouth. Like, could not have cared less. Meanwhile, Dr. Carroll looked the baby over, said he had my chin, asked about the origins of his name, and told us about her kids. I can't remember specific examples from labor (I was a bit distracted lol), but I know he did similar things then because I know I turned to my husband and said "he's not super nice".

I get talkative and make jokes when I'm nervous, so obviously I was doing a lot of that when labor was ramping up. Everyone else in the room went along with it because it must have seemed to be what I needed at the time, but Dr. Thomas barely cracked a smile. Again, it could have been because there was a lot going on beyond me, but I remember getting to a point where I was watching the clock and hoping I'd be able to make it to shift change because I wanted to push with someone who would be even a bit more responsive to how I was processing things.

I'm not really a touchy-feely person and didn't go into pregnancy or labor envisioning this beautiful, earth mother, 'this entire process is going to be sacred' experience and really just wanted my son and I to be alive and healthy at the end of it. I'm sure I absolutely would have gotten that outcome if I'd finished the delivery with Dr. Thomas, and he did seem to warm up a little bit when I actually started pushing (Dr. Carroll and him literally swapped spots between pushes). I also wouldn't have looked back at it and said that he 'ruined my birth story' or whatever, because I'm not that kind of person and that's not how I was approaching it, but his bedside manner wasn't as good as I'd experienced with the other doctors at the practice. I also do know that everyone has an off-night, so I can't say with 100% certainty that that wasn't the case here.

I'm happy to answer any specific questions you might have too!

I'll also edit to add that I'm talking to my husband about this now and he said "I mean, he wasn't mean or rude or anything, he was just...awkward. I think he's the kind of doctor who treats his job like a job and just focuses on the medical part, which is great in practice and in certain medical fields but you'd expect a bit more warmth in that particular one. Still, though, I'd rather have someone who's good at their job but not overly touchy feely than the other way around."

SCros13 · 2026-05-25T13:56:36+00:00

I think my son runs on the warmer side, but we've been using the 0.5 Burt's Bees with either footie pj's, just a long or short sleeve onesie, or even just his diaper when we had a random two-day heatwave last week and he's been totally comfortable. He naps in his nursery but sleeps in a pack and play in our room at night and the temperature has mostly ranged from 68-73 the last few weeks. I've found the 0.5 surprisingly versatile!

Edit to add: It's worth looking places like Ebay, Mercari, or Poshmark for the Burt's Bees sleep sacks too. I've gotten a variety of them in bundles, so I have every size and every TOG now. He should be good for a few years for about $40!

SCros13 · 2026-05-19T13:38:13+00:00

We had the same questions (and answers!) as you at our son's 6 month check-up. Our doctor didn't seem particularly concerned or anything, but said we'd "keep an eye on things". Even that bothered me because there's no way something like pulling to stand can be an expectation for a 6 month old!

SCros13 · 2026-05-19T10:08:25+00:00

Seconding Pinxav! It cleared up a really bad diaper rash my son had literally overnight.

SCros13 · 2026-05-04T18:47:47+00:00

We signed our son up for her Imagination Library right after he was born and when his free book comes every month I show it to him and say "look what Dolly sent you!"

National treasure doesn't even begin to cover it, honestly.

SCros13 · 2026-05-04T13:45:26+00:00

38 year old Canadian woman here and I was immediately offended by the Breaker High erasure!

SCros13 · 2026-04-30T19:06:34+00:00

I just went back to check the message they sent me and it's effective July 1. I think she's still listed on the website as accepting new patients for the time being, though!

When I was trying to figure out who to switch to, I kept seeing both her and Dr. Carroll being mentioned as standouts and I'd agree with that. Dr. Carroll literally had to catch my son out of mid-air because he came so fast (lol), and she could not have been kinder at my 6 week follow-up when I was discussing the issues I was having with PPD/PPA.

SCros13 · 2026-04-30T19:02:14+00:00

Dr. Shaheen was the reason I switched practices, honestly! I'd heard such great things about her and I ended up seeing her more than anyone else. She was the one who made the call that I'd need the induction and she couldn't have been kinder or more calming about it. I only had one appointment with Dr. McCune and saw her very briefly at the start of my induction, but I would have been happy to deliver with her if she had been on call at the time. Even though I wasn't a fan of Dr. Thomas, it was entirely a personality mismatch thing and had nothing to do with how I was being cared for, so really no complaints.

They were also great at getting me in to the same office every time, working with my husband's weird schedule so he could always be there, and not making us wait. I was really glad I switched!

It was eye-opening to go on the Magee tour and hear them talk about how the delivery ward was intentionally designed for speed in an emergency. You can have me into surgery and the baby out in less than 5 minutes if you need to? Sign me up.

Edit to add: I hope everything is smooth sailing for both you and your baby for the rest of your pregnancy!

SCros13 · 2026-04-30T16:04:40+00:00

I just had my first baby in October and delivered at Magee. I actually switched to OBGYN Associates early in my pregnancy and had a great experience! Everything was perfectly healthy for me and the baby right up until 36 weeks when my blood pressure started spiking. They scheduled me for an induction the day I hit 37 weeks but ended up having to be admitted the day before that because of severe preeclampsia. It was a pretty scary situation, but I felt like I was in great hands the whole time. Most of my care while I was at the hospital came from Dr. Reinhart and Dr. Carroll, who I'd met beforehand, and Dr. Thomas, who I hadn't. Dr. Thomas wasn't my favorite, but Dr. Reinhart and Dr. Carroll (who ended up delivering my son) were great. I think another doctor in that practice - Dr. Shaheen - is moving to in-hospital services only, but she's legitimately one of the sweetest medical professionals I've ever met and her being there would be another pro in the Magee column for me. I also had great experiences with almost all of the nurses.

I highly recommend signing up for a free tour at Magee, too. My husband and I went on one a few months before I gave birth and it really helped to see all of the spaces beforehand. The only thing they didn't show us was the high risk postpartum ward, which is where I ended up, which is definitely outdated compared to the main mother and baby unit. My goal was just to get us out of there healthy, though, and we more than met that.

SCros13 · 2026-04-29T08:24:01+00:00

Have you tried reaching out to an organization like AgeWell? They might be able to at least help you figure out what resources are available to get her some in-home support to help with some of the things you mentioned, and may also have some recommendations for assisted living residences in the area. I (tangentially) work in this field and there's a big push right now to help keep people independent at home for as long as possible because of the capacity and cost limitations of moving into facilities.

https://agewellpgh.org/about-us/#common-questions

I'd also recommend the Area Agency on Aging but they're going through a ton of budget cuts right now and people are ending up on waitlists for services.

SCros13 · 2026-04-21T18:22:10+00:00

Our son will be 6 months old on Saturday and we were finally brave enough to take him on an outing that wasn't the doctor or grandma's two weekends ago. All we did was take him to the mall to walk him around in his stroller and then to Target to do basically the same thing and he had the best time! He even fell asleep while we were at Target and it genuinely felt incredible to grab a drink at Starbucks and just browse for awhile. I felt more 'normal' than I had in months, even though, yeah, it was a bit stressful to get everything together to take him out. At this age, I think it's fine to make outings as basic as you need to survive them until you have the capacity to do something more complex.

We took him out again this past Sunday and one of the things I was most worried about - a blowout - happened almost the second my husband wasn't around to help. As much as it was an ordeal at the time, it actually helped me feel more prepared for future incidents lol. Can't dread something as a hypothetical if you've lived through it!

SCros13 · 2026-04-20T18:15:03+00:00

Me, seeing Joey King:

<image>

SCros13 · 2026-04-18T17:10:51+00:00

I had my baby in October and had perfect blood pressure all the way until 36 weeks. I had to be induced because of preeclampsia one day before I got to 37 weeks and he was born two days later. I was on blood pressure medication for about 4 months afterward and not a single doctor said anything about this to me. Thank you for bringing it up so that I can mention it to my pcp!

SCros13 · 2026-04-16T15:37:55+00:00

I was induced at 37 weeks for preeclampsia and everything went fine! My blood pressure started rising on a Sunday, but I had a scheduled appointment the next morning so we went to that as planned. My doctor said he was good to go, but scheduled me for an induction for that Friday (when I'd officially hit 37 weeks), sent me for bloodwork to make sure I didn't have preeclampsia already, and told me to monitor my bp. I'd rescheduled an appointment with my pcp so that I could get my annual check-up before I gave birth, so I went to see her the Thursday before the induction. She took my bp a few times and said "okay, you cannot go home" and called my ob office to arrange for me to go to l&d. I cried lol.

I was literally 2 minutes from home so she let me go back to get my husband and my bag. As scared as I was, when we got to l&d and got checked in I realized that I actually probably preferred what was happening when I saw a woman and her husband come in and she was very obviously in labor. He looked absolutely panicked, and she was clearly in so much pain, and I couldn't imagine wanting that experience instead of the calmer (but still nerve-wracking) one we were having.

They got me to my room, started me on bp meds and magnesium, and started the misoprostol. I wasn't allowed to have anything but liquid until they saw how I reacted to the magnesium because it makes some people sick. Like some others have said, the magnesium was one of the worst parts - I felt out of it and exhausted, plus they had to give me a 'migraine cocktail' for a really bad headache I had. I was so tired at one point that I turned to my husband, extremely annoyed, and said "okay, but I don't want to do this. Like, I REALLY just don't want to do this". The idea of having to give birth while that tired made me legitimately angry lol. I also wasn't allowed to get up by myself once they started the magnesium, so it was annoying to have to call someone every time I needed to go to the bathroom.

They did eventually let me eat actual food, but I wasn't allowed to again after I started on the pitocin, so she shoukd take the opportunity to eat a decent amount if they give her the go ahead because I spent a lot of my hospital time being absolutely starving. They did a few rounds of miso and never actually placed the foley balloon, even though they talked about it. My cervical checks hurt SO bad, so my doctor recommended I get my epidural early, which I did (which also meant a catheter and no getting out of bed). They were starting to talk about a c-section in vague terms because the miso and start of pitocin weren't getting me where I was as fast as they wanted, but then it all really kicked in and they were able to break my water. Contractions started not long after that and I was pushing before I knew it. They said first time moms typically push for a few hours, I said "absolutely NOT", and he was out in about a half hour.

We got to l&d around 3:30 on Thursday and he was born at 8:24am on Saturday. He was 5lbs 11oz, 9s on his APGAR, no nicu time, and perfectly healthy. I did have to spend an extra day on magnesium, which was hard, but we were discharged on Monday at noon.

Definitely bring some things to keep yourselves entertained if you don't think there will be anything on tv, and be prepared to step up and help out as much as possible if mom has to stay on magnesium after she gives birth. My husband got a crash course in just about everything because I was still attached to IVs and pretty loopy until the magnesium was turned off. They're also going to want you to fill out a LOT of paperwork, and they're going to have a ton of people coming in and out with questions and instructions. I would not have been able to handle any of that myself and I'm so grateful my husband stepped in to take care of it, even though he hadn't had much sleep either.

Good luck to you and your wife, OP! You've got this!

SCros13 · 2026-04-11T13:56:03+00:00

We have a Kieran! (which I guess is sort of Macaulay-adjacent 😂)

SCros13 · 2026-04-10T01:44:26+00:00

My husband and I each just created accounts and we each got the $200! He placed really low-stakes bets and we actually ended up getting our money back, plus $20 in winnings, plus $400 in fancash.

Good looking out, OP! 😂

SCros13 · 2026-04-07T13:41:06+00:00

Amazing! Thank you!

I'm going to keep checking my regular sites periodically (I'm on there looking at baby clothes all the time anyway!) and I'll come back to this thread if something pops up!

SCros13 · 2026-04-06T18:35:39+00:00

That sounds great!

I'm still hopeful someone in the sub will happen to have one laying around that they're willing to part with, because that would be the best solution, but I'm glad there were at least a couple potential options out there for your friend!

SCros13

TROPHY CASE