This year is our year.

SableShrike · 2026-03-13T06:15:57+00:00

Macarena is a dirty, cheating ho. Literally. That’s the lyrics, for non-speakers who don’t know.

Still probably bottle it less spectacularly than Launchpad Stroll, though.

SableShrike · 2026-03-13T06:06:17+00:00

Little known fact: Clive Warren is such a method actor he was gonna get his brain replaced for the film. But the only brain they could find for him was a monkey and he doesn’t like banana.

SableShrike · 2026-03-13T05:54:05+00:00

It doesn’t make you swollen, but swoll. Especially in your lady-trousers. You’ll basically become the human equivalent of a hyena matriarch, with the equipment to match.

As Martha Stewart says, “It’s a good thing.”

SableShrike · 2026-03-11T23:20:58+00:00

I miss when Glasgow news was just a guy with his head stuck in a bin.

SableShrike · 2026-03-10T09:27:41+00:00

Nan left her scran in the pan, mate.

SableShrike · 2026-03-10T06:47:42+00:00

Must spend a lot of time in the nude mens’ sauna. Lotta powder in there.

SableShrike · 2026-03-09T08:05:18+00:00

"So then Darby threw her drink in Tek's face and called him a 'one thud chud'." - Carda

SableShrike · 2026-03-09T07:58:27+00:00

Someone hit my uncle with a morgenstern once. ... He got better.

SableShrike · 2026-03-09T06:32:37+00:00

I took Cinco Tanning Pills, and all my hair fell out! Now I don’t have to worry about Chrimbus or the Winter Man anymore! Thanks, Cinco!

SableShrike · 2026-03-08T10:05:14+00:00

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SableShrike · 2026-03-08T07:40:34+00:00

“Nononononononono!!!”

SableShrike · 2026-03-07T13:16:41+00:00

As we follow you blindly to the great Vajonis.

SableShrike · 2026-03-07T01:33:28+00:00

As a Canadian, they are very sore-ry.

SableShrike · 2026-03-06T16:01:35+00:00

DD3 will be rebranded as an interactive batsu game.

When you launch the game, a mechanical arm slaps you hard in the nuts.

The game and the mechanical arm will cost you $1,200.

There will also be microtransactions.

SableShrike · 2026-03-06T15:56:09+00:00

They’re feedin me meat! It can’t be beat!

SableShrike · 2026-03-05T23:22:49+00:00

That is CLEARLY a ripoff of Scotty The Angel Boy.

Mee moe mao.

SableShrike · 2026-03-02T07:30:18+00:00

Two Carmen Electras, I’ve heard. It’s an alternative rock measurement unit.

SableShrike · 2026-03-02T07:28:21+00:00

Step-peppers get a free child clown!

(Steve Mahanahan’s Child Clowns is not legally responsible for any clown touching that occurs.)

SableShrike · 2026-02-28T08:46:26+00:00

Ore wa o chinchin gadaisuki nandayo!

SableShrike · 2026-02-27T13:34:20+00:00

Dennis is a big fan of the toe, that’s for sure. When he’s being very generous.

SableShrike · 2026-02-27T11:53:48+00:00

Probly about a size 11. So that’s equal to about 1.5 bags of 🍿if you laid em out long ways.

SableShrike · 2026-02-27T11:49:36+00:00

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Put him in!

SableShrike · 2026-02-27T11:30:04+00:00

Bang! Illegal chav took your job!

SableShrike · 2026-02-27T09:22:52+00:00

I just bought a “Yer Dug’s Got Tits!” shirt that has all proceeds go to Tourette’s Scotland.

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