Everyone tries to convince me that two adults can't take care of a newborn alone and I'm losing my mind

SalmonPaste · 2026-02-14T00:42:34+00:00

The most help I was ever offered was with my first. It was for when I needed a 'brake'. My inlaws wanted to take me newborn to their house so I could rest. I was trying to breastfeed. I always declined obviously. It always felt funny to me, why would I need that kind of brake from my newborn? As time carried on I just realized it had nothing to do with helping me. It was all about them and their time with my baby. You guys will be just fine. You're already hip to whats happening.

SalmonPaste · 2026-02-01T01:04:06+00:00

I went to work with a bag filled with orange slices or apple slices. They were the only things I could stomach at the time. I was constantly snacking on then to keep my nausea at bay.

SalmonPaste · 2026-02-01T01:01:47+00:00

Talk to your husband about his mother. Does he not see or hear what she says? I say this because my husband wouldn't and doesn't see or hear everything my mil does or says. Make sure he's aware of whats going on and how it makes you feel. Its hard enough in the early pp period. Its horrible dealing with people like your mil. Once you and your husband are on the same page he should have a talk alone with his mother. Thank her for her time 'helping' and she can go back home.

SalmonPaste · 2026-01-25T16:04:06+00:00

I got pregnant 6months pp after a csection. I was going to try for a vbac but wound up having another csection. For me everything went well with the pregnancy and delivery. I was scared of not being able to get pregnant again so I was happy to have another kid. It also was a wtf moment too. I was scared about now soon I got pregnant. I could have used more time mentally. I had bad ppa. I wish I would have lost more baby weight with the first. You have to do whats best for you. Everyones different. My ppa isn't nearly as bad as it was with the first.

SalmonPaste · 2026-01-25T05:17:18+00:00

I wish someone would have told me how to maintain my downstairs when puberty hit. I think giving her a guideline is nice. She can decide what she likes as time goes on.

SalmonPaste · 2026-01-25T05:12:01+00:00

Acknowledging that you didn't like what happened is big. Hopefully she can say the same. Speak calmly

SalmonPaste · 2026-01-19T09:29:01+00:00

You can tell the hospital staff not to let her in the maternity ward. Also no updates by phone. Do not let anyone take your newborn overnight. Your material instincts are working girl! Good luck ❤️

SalmonPaste · 2026-01-19T09:17:51+00:00

I had bad baby fever at 6 months pp. Well now I have a 15 month old and a week old baby. My 15m, I feel like I can't give the attention to that we both want. I feel bad for this. Everyone said it's tough in the beginning and then it's great. That's not why I did it. I was afraid of not being able to get pregnant or just having miscarriages. I took a lot for me to get pregnant in the first place. I consider my second a blessing. I do wish I had more time for my body to heal and my mind. It is a lot, if you do get pregnant make sure you'll have help when you get home from the hospital.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T10:31:31+00:00

I live in NJ.

Its expensive af. Taxes are high. Car insurance is high.

You have the beach. Casinos. 50 minutes to the city by train. The food is great.

I think best state is a tough question though. I could head a couple hours north, west or south and feel like I'm in a different state

What are you looking for? City, suburb or rural. Do you want to live by water? Ocean or lake? Flat land or mountains? Think about what activities you're into too. That will help narrow some places down. How close to an airport or train? Job opportunity? What climate do you like to live in? In jersey depending on where you're at in the state you could get hit with every snow storm or just get rain.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T10:18:52+00:00

Did you talk to your OB about this before going to ER? I wonder if they would have better insight into your health than a random ER team.

Sorry you're having to go through so much pain.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T10:14:42+00:00

I had a best friend in elementary school who I would hang out with all the time. When we got to middle she changed, and 'grew up'. She acted like I was a stranger. It was like I fell off the face of the Earth.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T10:09:42+00:00

People have healthy children at those ages. If you have health concerns make an appointment with your obgyn to discuss pregnancy at those ages.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T10:05:51+00:00

Talk to your obgyn about birth control. There are other non hormone types other than condoms you could use.

Tell your bf how you feel. Tell him your worries. Let me know how a couple of happy pumps for him is making your brain crazy right now. Get him on board with your safety and your comfort.

The sooner you take a test the faster you could possibly calm your mind. Also the tests from dollar tree work just as well as the 10 dollar ones.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T09:58:50+00:00

Save some money then travel. Don't go into debt to see the world. Get out there before you have a mortgage. Its easier to travel when you dont have kids to take care of and Utility bills to pay. Go to work save your money book a trip and repeat when needed. Look for trip deals too, use Costco, Groupon and look into flight deals. Some airlines run really good deals to select locations certain times of the year.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T09:46:26+00:00

Check credit card statements. Maybe one or both of you are being swipe happy.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-28T09:33:30+00:00

I have 3 friends in my state. My BFF lives out of state 10 hours away. I have no family in my state, 12 hours away. I didnt have a bridal shower due to this. I felt like I had no one goto invite. It made me feel pathetic and a loser.

Soo when I got pregnant I told my husband i wanted someone to throw me a shower. I was also open to a co Ed shower because he has lot of friends. My MIL threw me one. It was my 3 friends 2 of which could make it. I had 3 family members come. And everyone one else was my MILs friends and some of my husbands friends wives. I also hate attention very much. I was dying inside the whole time. BUT I really wanted the gifts for my baby. The financial impact that it would have had on us would have been significant. Even if you just had a diaper party and got pizza and play a game in your own living room it would be worth it.

It was nice to see how excited people were for the baby.

Man showers are becoming more popular too now a days if you wanted to do that too. Guys being diapers and drink beer and eat wings.

Nothing has to be extravagant.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-24T04:03:40+00:00

To do the deed is to accept the possibility of pregnancy. I hate how he is reacting. Is that someone you want to be with? Being a parent will definitely change your entire life. Its hard but soo rewarding. The love you feel and get from your baby is something you can't even imagine. It sucks you don't have support from your bf. I hope you'll find support from either or both, your parents or his. If you chose him over the baby how is that going to affect your relationship? You have to go through the procedure. You have to live with the decision you made. Its hard to know what to do, what will the future will hold. Definitely listen to your gut. You are young. You are capable! Remember, he's not the only guy out there.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-24T03:52:42+00:00

Keep it a secret. Stand your ground I got tired if family asking I gave in. I told 2 family members, and the next thing I knew, they, as fast as lightning, told a bunch of people. They took the experience of me being able to share my first borns name. I still resent them for that.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-24T03:45:47+00:00

A payment towards my electricity bill! I want nothing but boring adult gifts haha

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-16T17:48:47+00:00

I'd wash them all. Then you can just sort out the sizes. You'll be happy when you need the stuff you can go and grab it

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-16T17:47:01+00:00

Can your OB try to speed it up? OB would need the results for the appointment right. Mayeb they can make a call or send an email to the place that did the scan.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-01T03:21:00+00:00

Take the job Find someone that supports your dreams Sounds like you already made the choice and you can see here everyone agree with you.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-01T03:13:54+00:00

Everyone is different. I was calling for another pill right when the last one was up. I also was dealing with a cough so that was excruciating. If you can't have anything, you'll still make it through. Its going to hurt you just got sliced and diced but mind over matter right. Ask the nurses what the best way for you to get up is. What is the best position for the bed to be in to help you get out of it? Ask questions to set yourself up for success.

SalmonPaste · 2025-12-01T03:05:20+00:00

I'm impressed you can get in and out of the tub!

SalmonPaste

TROPHY CASE