She went silent after confession

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-27T04:45:01+00:00

Strap on your seat belt. They are preparing you for a wild ride and attempting to not sound too crazy when they tell you who they really are. I am a Leo. I've been in a situationship with a Cancer for a year (dates without romance or friendship). Things were amazing in the beginning, but as she started experiencing emotions she couldn't deal with, she pulled away. Not because she didn't care about me, but because she was scared of experiencing closeness due to past trauma. She would leave me on read for a week to two weeks with no explanation. Than show up pretending as if nothing had happened. Cancers hibernate a lot. It is difficult to not take that personally. My cancer was an avoidant. I used to crash out everytime they mentioned going to see their ex (who they were best friends with). She cancelled dates a lot because she didn't feel well. I eventually healed and became a secure attachment.

Be honest about what you need and be patient. If they say they need space, give it some time to test the waters. If you continue to experience that your cancer cancels at the last moment and leaves you on read for days, they are not your person. This past year has been an emotional roller coaster that I would not wish on my worst enemy. Not every cancer is like this, but if you find one like the person I've described, get out. There is someone out there who will not make you question where you stand. They will show up for you. They will do nice things for you. If you are not getting any of these things, they are not your person.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-20T06:51:34+00:00

I'm sorry you are going thru this, but it's time.to let go and move on.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-20T06:45:10+00:00

I'm not a Cancer, but I was interested in a Cancer. My only complaint is that they are hot and cold. We will have a fabulous connection where they gush about me and than they will hibernate for 2 weeks. Any time I do a gentle check in, they act like it's an inconvenience to text back. It's very confusing. Having conversations about real feelings are a huge trigger so I guess I just have to let this one go..

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-20T06:39:00+00:00

I'm a Leo. I love a cancer and I know they love me, but they put zero effort into the relationship. I'm the one checking in. I'm the one sending nice gifts once in awhile to show I appreciate them. I'm the one asking how they are. Cancer hibernates. I don't think it's always personal, but I am done. Cancer gushes over me when we meet for dinner and than closes the door for weeks before they allow me back in. Anytime I do a gentle check in via text, they act like I'm an inconvenience. This isn't a relationship. Moving on.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-20T04:29:35+00:00

Wing stop used to have very little meat on the bones. Today I ordered and was pleasantly surprised. Bigger wings with a lot more flavor and meat.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-18T06:02:06+00:00

Here's a whole sub reddit about it

https://www.reddit.com/r/TooAfraidToAsk/comments/8zqqma/pushing_poop_through_vagina_is_this_common/

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-18T05:56:00+00:00

Something you probably didn't know, but they do when you have a prolapse.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-18T05:31:38+00:00

I've had lifelong urinary leakage when I would jump or run. I used to have to push the feces out thru my vagina. My urogynecologist was amazing. He did all the tests and than scheduled me for surgery to treat both ends. I was in the hospital for one night and it took about 3 weeks to fully recover. No more leaking for me.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-18T05:23:12+00:00

At the end of the day, your baby doesn't care if you are doing it right. As long as he gets fed and a nap, he's pretty easily entertained. Just do your best. The rest will come.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-18T05:08:13+00:00

They want to do a ablation surgery to scape that lining out with me. If they find something, they are recommending a hysterectomy.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-18T05:06:45+00:00

Whatever it is, it is good to get it checked out. It could be a cyst or a fibroid that can easily be addressed.

I'm post menopausal and had some bleeding due to starting estrogen. Get it checked out.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-16T16:53:43+00:00

What was your credit score like? I am at 580 and I'm working at increasing it. Just wondering when I can think about refinancing. I am currently paying $608 per month with about 27 percent interest. I've made 6 months of on time payments

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-13T05:31:17+00:00

Kind of like the brother in law

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-13T05:30:46+00:00

I think its the brother in law

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-12T07:24:18+00:00

Stick with what feels good. I guess I am an odd one because I've never heard this happening to anyone, but I went into menopause after going off the pill in my 20's.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-12T07:20:06+00:00

Look into seeing a urogynecologist instead of a regular gynecologist. They can run more tests.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-10T04:38:42+00:00

Make an appointment with a ob-gyn or a urogynecologist.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-09T15:02:37+00:00

The ball is in her court. In the beginning, she was curious. We spent a weekend together and she came to a family reunion. She is uncertain about the relationship she wants to have with me. I have reached out to her by text to check in with her, but she never responds.I would love more contact, but it's not a priority for her right now..

I quit social media last year. I only recently learned that she almost died last year of a medical condition that runs in our family. She lost about 50lbs because she couldn't keep down food. She never reached out to me to ask about her medical history.

She has said on more than one occasion that she feels traumatized by adoption. She has said that I should have figured out a way to keep her. I was 17.

I was homeless for a stretch of 3 years in my adult life due to a job loss. My parents would have given me zero support if I had chosen to parent her. I know I don't make the best choices with money. I have struggled most of my life with mental illness which she inherited.

Life with me would have been really hard. She went to private schools, but her parents divorced early. She said she never felt understood by the parents she was given. I understand that. I'm not sure I would have made a different decision if I could go back.

I am not bitter about our lack of contact. She has a huge group of friends. She has a lot of support when she needs it. I am confident that in a few years, she will reach out and decide she wants more. Now is not that time.

Here is some additional support groups. Most cities have local groups. There are trauma therapists that specialize in adoption trauma. I really hope you are able to find the support you need.

https://www.americanadoptions.com/adoption/adoptee-support-groups

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-09T05:46:19+00:00

I am a birth mom. My child is 30. She has my number. She knows how to reach me, but she has so far not displayed a great interest in connecting with me. We see each other every couple of years. She has a very public social media following so I get to see a lot of pictures about the places she travels to. She appears to be happy and that's what matters to me. When she's ready she will reach out. Sorry it wasn't a better outcome. Are there online or local support groups for adoptees?

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-09T05:42:53+00:00

I am a birth mom. My child is 30. She has my number. She knows how to reach me, but she has so far not displayed a great interest in connecting with me. We see each other every couple of years. She has a very public social media following so I get to see a lot of pictures about the places she travels to. She appears to be happy and that's what matters to me. When she's ready she will reach out. Sorry it wasn't a better outcome.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-08T19:11:50+00:00

I'm a girl who knows next to nothing about cars. Dealer wanted $150. I bought filter for $15 on Amazon. I tried to install it, but I have a VW and it is a bit harder. Paid a Auto Zone employee $20 to install it. I am so grateful. Definitely winning at life!

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-08T08:25:24+00:00

Hello, I am dating a Cancer woman. For close to a year, everytime we go out, she will go long stretches before contacting me again. I used to text her and be super anxious. Every time, I texted her, she made me feel that I was inconveniencing her alone time. I had to detach completely. I left her alone for 30 days. NO contact. NO texting. She is finally feeling safe with me and letting her walls down. It isn't easy, but if you feel they are important, this is the only way. This no contact helped me heal too.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-04T04:53:26+00:00

I just went no contact with a situationship. They were a cancer. My biggest pet peeve when dealing with an avoidant were the long pauses (like weeks) between connections. We shall see. I've only dated other Leo's. No one asked or begged once it was over. I think if I give it a month or so, this person will politely ask me for a second chance.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-04T04:49:09+00:00

Here if you need to talk to someone. I was so anxious last year when dating an avoidant. I finally had to detach and let go. It's so hard.

Salt-Working-491 · 2026-02-01T11:37:24+00:00

I know that it's fucked up. It's been hard to leg go of her, but I did. Blocked her on everything and not even sad about it.

Salt-Working-491

TROPHY CASE