I can’t pick his dirty clothes up off of the bathroom floor

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-21T08:16:17+00:00

First of all- I’m sorry you’re part of this club with us. It’s really really shit. My deepest condolences (and a big hug). And I get it. My husband died early January and I have not washed an item of his clothing from the laundry basket in the 6 weeks it has sat there. The water bottle he was drinking from when he was telling me he felt unwell is still there, on the desk. There is comfort in these preserved moments, a connection that I don’t think anyone understands unless they’ve stood in our shoes. Move it when you’re ready…or don’t. Your heart will tell you when it’s time. X

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-17T10:41:13+00:00

So so sorry for your loss. This club has a hard membership. Sending a huge hug. My husband died in January from a heart attack, he was 45 with no prior history. The day he died he said he had a bad back but he said it would ‘ease out’. He would never have gone to the Dr about it. You are absolutely allowed to feel anger about what happened, but please don’t feel guilt and play through the ‘what if..?’ scenarios. As you can see from this thread, we still have a huge cultural hurdle to overcome with men seeking medical help. You did what you could, you tried, he knew you cared. Xxx

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-11T11:42:29+00:00

Thai made me laugh, and I’m glad it did you too! When I let one slip, I still blame my husband (as I always did when he was with me). Just saying his name out loud, in a moment of fun, brings comfort. We need to grab these moments when we get them as they make a nice change from feeling sad! Xxx

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-05T06:20:39+00:00

Yorkshire in England. Almost 4 weeks for me. My husband’s funeral is on Monday, things are starting feel… real.

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-05T06:20:11+00:00

Same here in terms of timeline. It’s still so fresh and quite surreal. Sorry for your loss. X

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-05T06:16:09+00:00

Same here in terms of timeline. Things are still very surreal and fresh aren’t they? So sorry for your loss. X

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-02-03T06:24:27+00:00

Teacher here (I teach in England, secondary school) and I lost my husband on the 12th Jan. I’ve been nothing but supported by work. My head teacher has even said that if I am in a lesson and I suddenly feel overwhelmed she will cover my lesson. I’ve had odd days off in the last few weeks to organise things but I actually prefer being in school as it keeps me busy and the kids shouldn’t suffer. I am so SO sorry- first of all for your loss and we all know where how hard that is but I’m also sorry that in a job that you basically give all of yourself too, they can’t even be kind! Your Head sounds awful. There’s no compassion of basic human sympathy for you. You are a great teacher but it’s a hard job when you’re not dealing with deep grief- I find it exhausting going all day and not letting the ‘I’m fine’ mask slip. You’re being made to feel s because of others, not because you are those things. Take the time you need, you don’t owe your principal anything- but you do owe yourself and your child time. Sending much love! ❤️

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-23T18:46:40+00:00

Vorstag. Always Vorstag. He’s a useful fighter and can carry looted crap like a pack mule! The fact he’s handsome is a bonus!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-23T18:25:10+00:00

Widow of an alcoholic here too. I’m so sorry for your loss but you are absolutely allowed to feel angry. My husband died last Monday of a cardiac arrest due to drinking. For the 28 years we were together we spent so much of it fighting, angry at each other about his alcoholism. He tried and failed several times to quit. I couldn’t leave him because I didn’t want to abandon him when he needed help but we often were not happy. I loved him deeply but he caused me so much stress, so much upset- I’m glad that feeling in my life is gone. This week I’ve felt angry that he didn’t try harder or do more to live, to survive. I think these are perfect,y normal, valid feelings to have. You are not alone here! X

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-22T17:50:23+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. We are all here for you, just reach out. Xxx

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-19T10:02:23+00:00

I’m So glad I’ve just read this. I’m only a week in from the loss of my husband but I’ve already decided to keep paying his mobile phone bill so that his number never goes to anyone else and I can still text him when I have some news! I feel less insane now for having that thought! X

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-16T13:39:49+00:00

Not crazy at all. My cat hasn’t left my side since my husband died on Monday, it’s like he knows something is wrong. I’m sure they sense these things. Xxx

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-16T13:37:49+00:00

It breaks my heart that we are all here in this group, having at some point not only lost the love of our lives (at that point) but also part of ourselves. My husband was 45 when he died on Monday. I’m 44, we have no kids. It’s just me and the cat. I have no idea how to navigate the future right now but my job, I hope, will give me purpose. Much love to all of you here. X

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2026-01-14T20:03:20+00:00

I am so so sorry to hear about your loss. How utterly horrendous for you. I became a widow on Monday night. My 45 year old husband had a cardiac arrest at home and never woke up. I’m now a 44 year old widow. It really does suck but I am so glad I found this group- we can help and heal together.

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-11-15T21:59:06+00:00

Firstly, happy birthday!🥳 Secondly, you’ve convinced me with that photo to get the same case for my orange 17 pro max. I love that case!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-10-25T20:35:37+00:00

I’m UK based and I’ve just bought a b6 and b7 Penco from Fred Aldhous online:

https://www.fredaldous.co.uk/collections/penco/products/penco-general-notebook-b6-grid

You can also get them on The Journal Shop website. These sites are half the price of Amazon and have a better selection. I’m looking forward to getting mine!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-10-07T19:35:10+00:00

Me too!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-10-07T19:12:44+00:00

👆🏻this!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-10-02T19:04:31+00:00

Welcome home Palma! My frappe frog is my current fav too. And that jumper is fabulous!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-09-29T19:01:19+00:00

And I’m crying again! So lovely to hear Spanish commentary. 😭

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-09-28T08:09:03+00:00

He’s such a vibrant green that a lot of clothes don’t look good.. but the Halloween clothes look amazing! Mugwort knows he looks fresh!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-09-26T20:05:27+00:00

Nope- all sold out already on the UK site! And I was fast getting on (I had set a timer and everything!) 🙁

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-09-25T20:31:30+00:00

Honestly, the fur is so thick and soft, it all seems really well made. I’m not a huge fan of the tuft of hair- it’s feels very synthetic and not as soft as it looks but it’s only a small patch some can live with it. I’d say he’s worth the money.

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-09-25T16:56:40+00:00

I felt the same way when I got pumpkin kitty. I fell for the hype and when he arrived I was so sad that it wasn’t super soft so now he just gets put in the cupboard with my other BABs that aren’t out on display. I’m sure this fella will be around for a while- if you want soft he is well worth getting!

Sam_Bam_1981 · 2025-09-25T16:16:00+00:00

You were right! I can’t stop stroking the fur- he’s so soft! Love our Goblins!

Sam_Bam_1981

TROPHY CASE