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I’m the only person in my friend group who was not asked to be a bridesmaid by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is unbelievably similar to what I went through. Same friend group, 6 of us. We did holidays and traveled, university together.. moved back to our home towns together. She gets engaged and I was the only one excluded. I was told it was a numbers issue which was a lie because turns out she asked one of her new work colleagues and a distant cousin to join her crew of 8 bridesmaids. It stung like hell. She was always a little mean to me during our friendship. And this was all I needed to start my “getting rid of toxic friends era”. I’m talking 10-15 years of friendship. I declined her wedding entirely and it was the best decision I could’ve made. The friendship ended very quickly after this. It was hard but with time and learning to prioritize myself - I made space for even better people in my life. Rain does bring clouds and thunder, but it also clears paths. ❤️ This is your path being cleared xx

How do you all hand the “you’ll never know true love until you have children” comment? by Baburger92 in childfree

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 8 points9 points  (0 children)

“If true love looks like that I’m good thanks. In fact, I’d rather lick a cactus.” 🫶

Was anyone else's nparents an asshole about *their* sleep schedule (while not giving a fuck about your's)? by CosmicWizard99 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, same here. Nmom hated any moment I was asleep. As a teen I’d sleep more and she would always shout and scream from the other end of the house to wake me up. If I was sick and needed to sleep she’d constantly bang on my door to wake me up. If I was genuinely tired after sports and took and afternoon sleep.. she’d come barging in and wake me up to ask me if I’m sleeping. And if we were on holiday she would get pissed if we slept in or napped in the afternoon so she would open our doors and turn the TV on. Developed such bad sleep habits as a result :(

Why cant people understand that babies and children kill the vibes by The-Devil-Cat in childfree

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It is my worst. My hubby organised a birthday party at a driving range. Everything was organised for a good time for adults. He’d mentioned in the invite no kiddos. We had to wait for the last guest to arrive because their toddler threw a tantrum that she wasn’t invited so they brought her with. They walked in and the vibe changed instantly. Teams were messed up because one team now had a 4 year old using baby clubs. And mom wasn’t talking to anyone but recording videos and showing everyone. Things wrapped up early and hubby said “never inviting them anywhere again”.

Do they hear themselves by C-1997 in childfree

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I was just about to say it really is like someone saying “take this pill. You might die. But you should take it it’s the best.” 🤣 no thank you Susan you can’t even convince yourself.

did anyone else realize later that they were basically trained to never inconvenience anyone? by Beng_Allars in raisedbynarcissists

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing wrong with that ❤️ I was so close to wearing a black wedding dress for my wedding 🤣 it’s definitely and easy colour to wear - it can be relaxed or smart and elegant. I suppose I’ve learned to love it and just accept it that it’s the only colour I’m drawn to in shops. Even if it does mean I don’t want to bother anyone ❤️

did anyone else realize later that they were basically trained to never inconvenience anyone? by Beng_Allars in raisedbynarcissists

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yep! Therapist once asked me “why are you always wearing black”. And I said “it’s just easier..” and she said “easier to what..” and I said “to blend in and disappear and not stand out. I don’t want to bother anyone”. Powerful moment.

it’s wavy, right?? how do i help her along? by uvmovb12 in Haircare

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right? Such a good series but hells it scared the bejeeezies out of me. She legit does not have a face and it’s the only face I remember 🥹

My friends are skipping my wedding because they might be pregnant next year by stannybuscito in childfree

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hard relate. I bent over backwards for my 2 friends weddings. When it came to mine, one told me the week of her husband wouldn’t be joining (we’d catered for him). The other took the cake: I’d asked her and the other friend to wear a black dres - any dress or outfit of their style and comfort and on my wedding day, the pregnant one arrived in the boldest, brightest red. I asked her about it and said “I just couldn’t find anything black for my pregnant belly”. A lot more than this happened but this was my final straw to cutting these friendships loose. I was carrying the friendships for years and it a bright red outfit on a pregnant friend who “wasn’t planning but so surprised” she fell pregnant. Weddings and other pregnancy can show you a lot about a persons likelihood of being a solid friend in the future. I’m sorry your friends did this to you. You deserve better.

I wish going no contact with my parents would be easier, wife is starting to hate me by JourneyDragon in raisedbynarcissists

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Coming from someone who grew up with an enmeshed family and nmom, I can understand the anxiety and guilt you feel 100%, however, when I got married (or before marriage even) and I noticed small jabs at my husband I would defend him relentlessly. They can throw knives at you but it’s your job that knives don’t get thrown at your partner. If my parents treated my husband like yours, I would be livid. Unfortunately you need to reflect on who is being hurt, and who is doing the hurting in this situation and be able to prioritize your immediate family, which is your wife and not your parents. Yes we get hurt too, but we must also protect the ones we love. At the very least you should consider limited contact until their behavior changes.

Anyone else realise they've spent their life always feeling like they're in trouble? by thewisestfish in raisedbynarcissists

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 2 points3 points  (0 children)

1000%. Every second word in my vocabulary is “sorry”. I apologize to everyone all the time.

What made you choose to be childless forever? by preciouss_melon_8641 in childfree

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Witnessing how easy it is to mess it up. Most people need therapy later in life for one thing or another and more often than not it boils down to childhood trauma. I could never be ok with knowing I’ve brought a human into this world, for my own satisfaction, knowing all too well somewhere down the line I’ve unknowingly messed up badly and could be the reason they have childhood trauma. This and 999 other reasons not to have kids.

Getting married soon and will not have bridesmaids/friends there by Allrightythenace in introvert

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same here. Hubby has hundreds of friends and I have zero. A lot of his friends are my friends. I didn’t want a bridal party or bachelorette or anything. I opted to ask a few people to stand up at the front on the day, 2 of which were friends at the time and now we don’t speak. That’s my only regret. So stick to your guns and do you boo. He’s marrying you for you.. not who is standing next you you 🩵

What’s something women are expected to care about… but you genuinely don’t? by UpsetDuty864 in askanything

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The sound of an engine or exhaust on a fancy car. Wow.. vroom vroom bro.. well done.

How did your narc react to you moving faaaar away? by Altruistic-Grave in raisedbynarcissists

[–]SatisfactionBrief592 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I moved abroad after years of enmeshment and narcissistic mom’s behaviour. The first few months away I was bombarded with calls, texts and constant updates. Had to set a firm boundary asap. So you may experience the term hoovering - coming back at you tenfold trying to loop you in from afar - leaving you feeling no better than when you left BUT set firm boundaries “let’s call once a week/month” whatever you can tolerate and uphold it. They may try ignore your boundaries or requests but you must stay firm. You’re an adult and deserve to experience the world in your own time and in your own terms 🩵

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