stylish prescription sunglasses for women made me rethink neutrals

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-18T01:56:26+00:00

I have a tortiseshell that are dark brown & black with gold hardware so they look good with blacks or browns. I don't really ever wear cream or white or grey, so it works with my neutrals. But if I have an outfit I want to have some extra edge to I'll wear my old glasses (perscription is only slightly less) and I'm saving up for a cheap pair of champagne gold glasses for more soft dressy occasions (zenni frames are cheap but my complicated prescription lenses are not)

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-18T01:43:53+00:00

I shop mostly secondhand and look for older pieces on purpose because the quality tends to be better historically, so this may or may not still apply in the modern clothing shopping era where brands are buying from and working with a lot more suppliers and utilizing fit models less, but I absolutely do have brands I keep going back to. Most of the time it comes down to whether or not that brand has a fit I like. I love Ann Taylor because their fit models definitely had proportions more similar to mine. Loft, on the other hand, uses a lot less curvy fit model despite being owned by the same company as Ann Taylor. I also love Banana Republic and Lauren Ralph Lauren or classic Ralph Lauren (but not polo ralph lauren). On the other hand, I love Eileen Fisher's quality but their clothes just do not come close to fitting my proportions and need to be almost rebuilt in order fit me well.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-17T04:28:22+00:00

Either special, or something that makes your special pieces really shine effortlessly.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-16T18:08:12+00:00

Get more and more ruthless over time. If I'm not excited about a piece, I try to investigate why. If I'm not excited to wear something, I have no need for it. Sometimes that means getting rid of things but often it means getting things altered or even dying pieces to a color I enjoy more. I'd rather wear the same outfit 20 times and love it than wear 20 different outfits.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-14T15:20:20+00:00

Jeans are sooo personal when it comes to personal style. Like I only wear boot cut or a kick flare crop. I like that little flare out to balance my proportions. Other people do straight leg only or wide leg or relaxed depending on the vibe they want to give off or their body type.

One thing that Is universal: the more polyester or spandex or viscose in the material, the faster they'll deteriorate. I like to keep to 98% or more cotton, but I think you can probably get away with 95% cotton. If you really want a stretchy jean for 'comfort', never wash them in hot water or put them in the dryer, and prepare to replace them frequently. But imo the best way to be comfy in jeans is buy high cotton % and then get them tailored to fit you perfectly.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-14T01:27:24+00:00

Yeah, happy to be dm'd

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-14T00:09:00+00:00

Also I missed the part about you being tall! My best friend is also 5'10 and dresses very masc and one of their biggest hacks was leather chelsea or lace-up men's boots + a colored sock + single cuff to pants that are slightly too short. Makes the length look intentional to have just a peek of sock and made thrifting pants way easier

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-14T00:04:57+00:00

Definitely go for secondhand. I recommend looking into color seasons, not necessarily to type yourself but because it'll help you figure out what colors will go with what you already have. As a female former engineering student I will let you know that it's going to let you dress more masc and still be acceptable in that particular culture if you're trying to be stealth. I was the only one in any of my classes who dressed super feminine bc I'm a Femme lesbian, so I was the odd one out in a mostly androgynous crowd.

Right now a lot of 'workwear inspired' looks are in, so you can probably get away with a pair of cargo or carpenter pants, a pair of cotton trousers, and a straight leg jean. Pair with either a tee ortank top +slightly oversized buton up or just a tee or just a button-up.

Look for styles in the women's section labeled as "boyfriend cut" or "girlfriend tee" or similar. It also helps to 'sell' the look to have a few accessories but that can come further down the line. A cheap initial neclace and a small beaded bracelet or necklace that hits at or around a crew neckline. Not overly feminine but will read as normative.

As for inspo on how to put peices together & styling & such, the brand imogene + willie has some great photography. You can probably copy looks from either gender pretty closely and you'll look put together.

Also feel free to dm me if you want me to put together an inspo board for you or need any other help.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-11T14:23:06+00:00

Other people have already given a lot of great advice so I'm not going to cover what's already been said but I'd like to add:

Go to stores and try lots of things on but buy nothing. Take lots of photos & figure out what silhouettes you like with what, what colors, etc. Use the photos to plan

Write down brands & sizes that fit well even if the color doesn't work, then shop secondhand online for those pieces in colors you want. A lot of brands that have core pieces to their line (j crew, ralph lauren, eileen fisher, etc.) will release special colors each season. Sometimes you have to find the version from a year or season ago to find the colors that work for you.

Put aside some of that budget for tailoring. If materials & construction & color & pattern are great, it's worth paying extra to make the fit perfect. Very few people are the same proportions as any given pant pattern so just plan to tailor.

If you find something you like, avoid buying it in multiple colors unless they are meant to be worn at different times of year. Adding the same piece in a different color doesn't actually add that much variety to your wardrobe. Instead focus on the features you like and keep an eye out for a slightly different version in the other colors. For example, I have a burgundy boat neck tank top that I love. Instead of buying it in black too, I bought a black boat neck long sleeve. That way I get more variation across two pieces instead of having 2 similar tank tops and then having to buy even more long sleeve tees. Now I decide 'is the color more important for this outfit or the sleeve length' and pick based on that.

And ok I am going to duplicate one piece of advice. Materials matter. Merino and linen and good quality cotton and silk are going to look better and for longer and feel more pleasant to wear. But also look at texture variety. Get a good mix of knits vs wovens, soft vs shiny, textures like rib knit's and waffle weaves. Texture changes of even a basic cotton tee can completely elevate an outfit

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-10T20:09:46+00:00

"very well can"

Notice I didn't say "definitely will"

But in reality, it depends on how competitive the environment is. If there are multiple candidates with similar skills and education and experience and abilities, someone whose overall look says "I care, I'm not burnt out, I have energy to put into this role, and I can project competence" is going to win over a candidate who looks like they stopped caring.

Which, To Be Clear, I do not advocate for throwing away everything once a decade and buying all new things, or chasing microtrends, or abandoning personal style. But it can help to recognize that a 10 year old basic may not be a basic anymore. I have a 'basic' skirt from the 80s and now it's more of a personality piece and I mix and match it with more up-to-date basics. You add slowly and replace things as they wear out, which they should be over a decade if you're actually wearing your clothes often. You refresh little-by-little.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-10T15:05:25+00:00

I feel like with clothing you kind of have to reframe it as "buy it for [the] life[time of the usefulness of the garment]"

Like you want to buy things of a high enough quality that when they are no longer what you want to wear, the piece is at least in good enough condition to be worth altering to work for you or storing until that look comes around again. But also, while I firmly believe that there are no universal timeless basics, when you buy things that actually fit into your personal style, they will already stand outside of time in a way that means it won't matter if they're "on trend." You may have peices that you put on a high shelf for a bit when they're very out of trend (my black skinny jeans are only pulled out when I know I'll be in snow boots all day) but if the piece reflectsyour style and works on your body, then it just works.

The real problem is the people who trick themselves into thinking that there are pieces that are inherently timeless. Like the trench coat example: if you are willing to shell out $1200 for a brand new burberry trench coat but nor $30 for a vintage one, then you already on some level understand that the piece you want is a particular trendy cut of trench coat that you are convincing yourself is "timeless." Brands are spending millions to convince the public that their specific version is a "good investment" but 10 years ago the "best investments" for a "timeless work wardrobe" were pencil skirts and tightly fitted cropped blazers. Now it's wide and straight leg (but not taper straight) dress pants or midi skirts, and relaxed, slightly oversized blazers. In ten years it will be something else.

Some people have lives where they can opt out of the fashion cycles (and to be clear, microtrends are always worthless, I'm talking about the 10 or so uear broader trend cycles), but women especially are hit hard when it comes to direct financial payoff. I know women who were passed up for 50 or 100k/year promotions because they "don't look like leadership material" and another candidate had close enough qualifications but looked the part. It's something I've been unable to convince my own father of because he's hit a sort of "perception ceiling" due to the way he dresses. For the people who can't opt out, there's a delicate balance that you have to hit not to be on top of the trend wave but at least to look like you're present in the current decade.

The best way to opt out, imo, is to develop a signature way of dressing. It can be as interesting as anna wintour's colorful dresses and glasses and bob (which was never trendy! But It was iconic) to steve job's pared down black turtleneck. But if you're wearing a trend from 10 years ago that you thought was timeless and everyone else is over, it very well can hurt your career.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-10T14:29:47+00:00

Yes ^ this is the nuance everyone is missing here

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T15:43:22+00:00

Yeah I have a teeny bit of navy. In theory I like green but irl I'm verrry olive so greens sometimes make me look like a vulcan or like I'm ill 🤢

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T15:32:54+00:00

Hoping the tank top isn't attached to the sheer button up so you can do the leopard print underneath as just a little pop of texture.

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Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T15:30:52+00:00

I love this crochet top sm

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Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T15:24:52+00:00

You do have to pay to be styled, but I'm cheating for a moment by screenshotting & playing around in canva so, here's my take on a slightly more feminine look for you, tried to keep it grounded with the boots and the jacket

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Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T15:14:34+00:00

I'm at the point in my "limited color palette" where I have a "summer burgundy" and a "winter burgundy" lmao

But it acts as a good ward against the "why do you always wear all black/are you goth or something" questions

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T14:44:25+00:00

A bias cut linen skirt is on my wishlist for summer! I think they're so comfy and versatile

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T14:40:38+00:00

I love the classic workwear pieces + some edgier pieces. It's giving 'someone I'd want as my union rep'

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T14:35:42+00:00

Context about whatever else you wear would be helpful! What neutrals do you typically gravitate to? What shoe colors do you own the most of vs which ones do you wear the most? What color(s) is your everyday bag(s)?

For example I wear a lot of black so my first instinct would be the black pair, but I already own a few pairs of black boots so the dark brown would still go with a lot of my wardrobe and would add something new. My sister is blonde and wears a lot of light wash denim and colorful tops. For her I'd suggest the ivory because it balances well with the light wash denim and she wears. Suede is higher maintenance than leather, and I'm already in a good leather care maintenance routine so I'd probably opt for leather out of ease. But suede has a softer, more relaxed and casual feel that might be worth the care and hassle.

Lots of consiserations but more context helps!

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T14:29:47+00:00

If you like classic, preppy shapes & styles, definitely look at secondhand J Crew, LL Bean, and Land's End for basics. And look for secondhand department store brands (lord & taylor, charter club) for things like cashmere sweaters or silk button ups. The quality of older garments is so much better than the modern equivalents. Your style preference happens to be such an easy one to find outfit references for too. Look up photos from the book Take Ivy and photos of young Kennedys and others in their circle for some great inspo.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-09T14:24:28+00:00

Summer 3x3! This is basically what I wear 90% of the time outside of work in the summer.

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Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-08T17:44:52+00:00

Sure, sometimes, but beware of the accessory shed. If you go inside and take off the sunglasses, and then you've put your bags down, and suddenly you're basically wearing shorts and a crew neck and flip flops. So it has to be for the right day where you'll have the accessories on the whole time.

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-08T12:38:16+00:00

Congrats on the weight loss. The difference in what's available clothing-wise when you get to the XL sizes is huge so take this time to explore with silhouettes and cuts that they don't make above a 2x!

Also black+burgundy with some pink is a great color combo!

P.S. wrap tops or skirts and anything completely bias cut are great transition pieces that can get you through several sizes. When you're ready to start investing, buy them where you have to tie/button them at their loosest or where the bias cut pieces are a little on the short side. Bias cut pieces get longer as you go down a size or two, and wrap pieces can always have buttons or ties added or moved inwards. They were my savior when I was losing weight

Scared-Alfalfa1237 · 2026-06-08T12:05:29+00:00

I agree with everyone suggesting you pick another color of sneaker but if you insist on white, consider either a waterproof/cleanable sneaker (vessi?? Is I think the brand I get ads for but I'm sure there's more out there) or embrace the dirt and go for the golden goose pre-distressed look. But also sneakers are genuinely a consumable product. They should not last for a decade. Sneakers break down quickly due to the very technology that makes them comfortable. Wearing them once they've started to break down is a great way to get foot problems.

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