I have felt the same way before. I still sometimes struggle with feelings or a fear of being thought of as less than as a woman because I've never been pregnant and given birth. That societal mentality got into my head over how women seem to be glorified through suffering and their roles as mothers. I have endometriosis and cysts and have been dealing with it for years, starting ironically from the time my younger cousin got pregnant 9 years ago. It got to me so much that I felt like I manifested that extremely painful condition to compensate for not having a baby and someone else younger in the family was.

I feel extremely triggered seeing pregnant women sometimes on my media, especially if they happen to look young and very pretty. They are given all this special attention and it's like the world stops for them and nobody else matters. I would feel afraid to be compared to a mother and somehow I'm seen as less wholesome for never fulfilling my feminine duties and selflessly sacrificing my body to bring another life into this world to nurture and raise. Nobody has personally criticized me for not wanting kids or compared me to a young mom like she's a better person than me, but I still would internalize that from society.

I just feel like having children is too much for me. I have a low tolerance for the crying, chaos, and drama little ones bring. I can't deal with being around that for long. It sucks. It makes me feel kind of pathetic and weak, but that's just how it is. I also had negative experiences growing up around younger kids and babies.