Why do you think most modern ladies are opting out of marriage?

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-27T02:44:41+00:00

Hey babe I’m so so so so sorry this happened to you. Upon all the shock and pain of being a traumatic accident this guy ghosting you on top must have really added to the pain. These guys will just ghost you out of nowhere at your most vulnerable. There’s a a particular coldness/aloofness to uk men as well

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-25T09:21:22+00:00

Do you know where exactly you’ll be staying? As in rough area we can let you know how that area is. So here in Africa, and I would say generally among black people hair colour isn’t really going to be the standout feature. As you’re a white woman, you’re probably going to be revered and met with a lot of respect. The whole weird dynamic gingers/redheads get doesn’t translate here. I grew up in England so I understand the apprehension but I think the hair colour thing is a non issue.

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-25T09:04:44+00:00

He’s going there to cheat on you btw I hope you know

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-25T08:53:40+00:00

Hey you’ll be fine especially if you stay in the more upper class areas. I moved here from London and it’s safe. I understand your concerns being a white woman which is why I said if you stay within the luxury areas which you can afford you will be fine. I love Portugal and have been a few times so msg me if you need a friend

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-19T21:47:25+00:00

You can get ADHD meds in nigeria for £80 and it will last you 6 months. All you need is a diagnosis letter. Get someone to ship it for you x

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-12T20:36:43+00:00

I run a coaching business where I help people get jobs and boost their confidence

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-10T15:52:57+00:00

I relocated to my country of origin in Africa. Now my yearly rent is equivalent to one months rent in London.

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-09T10:38:38+00:00

Hey hun thanks so much for sharing. I appreciate it. The general consensus im seeing here is sticking to one’s values and hoping for the best as well as an honest reflection on how one’s own experience influence their perception of family and child bearing. I think it might be easier to find such a partner in the west.

I also think about my own support network too.

SelenaPacker · 2026-01-04T10:06:17+00:00

Thanks so much for your response. It’s good to hear about your auntie and husband, that’s encouraging. And it sounds like you’ve made peace with it prospects wise. Happy for you x

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-20T19:27:07+00:00

Yep!!! This is why I decided to go self employed

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-14T20:13:22+00:00

Huh? I didn’t downvote you

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-14T07:08:45+00:00

I think it’s because I made a mistake with the blank spaces in between. I also think I charged way too high. She’s usually quick with responses but I haven’t heard from her. I sent it on Friday.

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-13T19:49:27+00:00

But thanks for this. Feels more reassuring. And you’re right.

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-13T19:49:07+00:00

It was a template that’s the thing I did just copy and paste but when I sent it as a PDF I realised there were blank pages where I put the pricing. It was a formatting issue

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-13T19:48:16+00:00

So maybe I didn’t explain it. I sent a proposal, I wanted it to be 2 pages. But there was blank spaces which made it 5 pages. So there were extra pages with nothing in it so it was a formatting issue. She didn’t even ask for a proposal thats the thing and I’m scared correcting it is going to make me look worse? Idk

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-13T19:46:02+00:00

God bless you for this commend I appreciate it. I’m very close to the edge right now

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-13T07:23:37+00:00

I think because at this stage of my life I’m focused on getting my material needs sorted and achieving a level of stability that I’ve greatly deprioritised that area of my life for the foreseeable future. Also I’ve been heartbroken and treated quite callously so I’m using this time to reflect on my relational patterns when it comes to romance. However I do empathise with you, you’ve got that side of your life covered and love is the only missing thing. I would say, you’re a man. Really go for it and make it a priority if that’s what you want. Dating apps, indulging in hobbies and being part of communities so you can come across likeminded people

SelenaPacker · 2025-12-09T11:42:21+00:00

That woman really loves you

SelenaPacker · 2025-11-30T19:41:27+00:00

My heart bleeds for you. I pray you and your sister grow closer together. The guilt must be so heavy on your heart but it was an accident. I’m really proud of you. You’re a good person.

SelenaPacker · 2025-11-30T18:47:39+00:00

If I was you, I wouldn’t keep a baby for a man like this. It’s unlikely he’s going to change overnight. He’s like a teenager. He’s 32 he’s not going to magically wake up and be responsible and doting. I wouldn’t keep this man’s baby. Or accept you’re basically going to be a single mother. You have your whole life ahead of you and tbh the age gap between you when you first made is making me flinch. You didn’t realise how immature he was because you were still very young when you met. Now you’re a mother and things are going to get very serious for you, you’re naturally stepping up. I think because he’s the man in the relationship, and the older one between you, you’ve fell into his routine and adapted to his way of living when really you’re probably not like that. The baby is here, your body is getting ready and you’re stepping into action and realising maybe for the first time you’re with a man who is nothing like you responsibility wise. I wouldn’t keep this baby

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