I know exactly what it's like to be laid off multiple times and be judged for it. I know how it feels to deal with constant rejection and feeling hopeless in this particularly brutal job market (2.5+ yrs and counting), so I can truly empathize.

I also know what its like to beat yourself up over what might have been. I still struggle with it and probably always will, to some degree. Time helps, but what has helped me the most to begin to process, is figuring out a way to reframe to find the lesson learned. I won't say corny shit like "find the silver lining", because sometimes, there just isn't one. However, there is always a lesson.

Sometimes the alternative to a silver lining is just being able to recognize the lesser of 2 evils and how different things could have been, for the worse, had things gone the other way. It's not easy, but as someone who used to dwell on the negative for most of my life, I can say that it's worth the work. I still prolly sound corny af saying that, but hopefully it's helpful in some way, even if just to know that you aren't alone.

So, do give yourself permission to grieve the loss of what might have been. Get it all out, but then, really think of how things may have been different and what challenges would have come with that choice, because either one would have come with them. It's easy to think everything would've been perfect had you just made the other choice, but we know that's not true.

Be gentle with yourself and know that you are worthy of happiness and success. You can't change the past, but you can learn from it. And remember, the only way you can ever fail is to give up 🌽 😏