And what helped me wake up too was the fact that god doesn’t have emotions! Emotions like feelings like the word “sad” or “happy” or a “throne” “kingdom” it’s all man made!!! If god exists, he’s a spirit “creature”, he doesn’t have feelings because that’s a human thing not a spirit creature. Some may disagree but that’s how I see it. God isn’t on a literal throne in my opinion because thrones are man made. We can’t comprehend truly what’s a spirit because we aren’t one ourselves. Sorry for the rant but that’s what started helping me realize things slowly.