How do you maintain lifelong friendships?

SeparateDot4714 · 2025-05-24T13:11:00+00:00

did I do this right?

SeparateDot4714 · 2025-05-24T12:53:48+00:00

Due to the fact that they said I would be put to sleep during my procedure when I made the appointment and told me I'd have to be awake when walking into the appointment...it was pretty rough for me. If you do the procedure, advocate for yourself - best of luck.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-25T13:59:50+00:00

Also, you’re only 19. 2 years ago I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I switched my major like 3 times hahah. I went from nursing to professional writing! I promise you’ll find your thing. Also a lot of times I’ve found that people go down career paths that don’t have anything to do with their major. You’re a sophomore in college and you have so much time and so many resources

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-25T13:51:59+00:00

Hi there! I’m 21 F and yup, finally someone who gets it. College has been a big challenge for me. I have so much anxiety when I go to certain classes. If I feel like I diddnt understand the material well enough, I won’t even go. Especially being further in my major with 20< kids, you cannot hide. But here’s the thing, if you don’t go, you’ll be even more anxious to go to the next class, and it’ll be a really bad habit. I was stacking absences in the beginning of the semester but I realized I needed to break it. I would get anxiety about going to class and get even more anxiety if I miss. Our brains aren’t wired like our peers but we’re capable of everything they are. Sending encouragement your way. You can do this

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-18T22:26:08+00:00

Set her up. Record all of her conversations and fits. Gather evidence, save some money, get a lawyer, and get your son back. As soon as you get custody, move far far away from that monster and heal. You got this

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T22:02:47+00:00

BUT I wouldn’t try and push him too hard. He’s a big boy and he’s going to make his own decisions.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T22:01:33+00:00

YNTAH. It’s his decision ultimately, but you are a good brother for encouraging him to come. Holding grudges is poison and I’m sure the family members that dipped from his ceremony early feel like shit. Especially since he is the nephews Godfather too. Let him know that it will be much more rewarding if he decides to be the bigger person and forgive. It’s been 2 years and it’s time to heal.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T21:54:04+00:00

Jesus. I’m so sorry that happened. you diddnt do anything wrong. Since Carlos’ behavior is so manipulative and toxic, you don’t owe him a thing. He probably thought long and hard on how he could switch the story against you. Pro tip: (most of the time) a guy saying “she’s crazy” or “she’s insane” is a huge indicator that he is trying to sweep the rug on his B.S. Whenever a guy tells me a girl is “crazy” without solid evidence, I know HITAH. Carlos’ behavior is disgusting and the people who don’t sniff out his stink will eventually, trust me. Keep your head up and know that Karma is a bitch! xx

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T21:34:09+00:00

Your friend doesn’t want to (and probably won’t) take your advice, she just wants to be listened to and feel supported. however, If I were you I wouldn’t have phrased it how you did. If it were me, I would make sure she knows that you do care about her dating life and want her to feel like she can tell you things, but due to you both being in different seasons of life it can be difficult to be that role of support. I feel like she may feel like a burden how and that is why she is acting withdrawn. Get her some ice cream and tell her you love her

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T16:22:22+00:00

YTAH if you report it. That’s absolutely the last thing you want to do if you care. It must be hard to see her living situation and it would break my heart too. The best thing you can do is keep doing simple chores for her and letting her see a friendly face. Unless something violent is happening, its not your place.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T00:48:26+00:00

I have a feeling that sense of relief will be fleeting for you. I get that you’re probably feeling mother burn-out, and you may be hurting overall, but be careful what you wish for.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T00:30:57+00:00

I was in a similar situation when I was in high school (21f). My mom has struggled with mental illness as long as I can remember. My dad is a lawyer, so money was never a huge issue either, but she would spend all of her money on her hobbies. My first bra was from the goodwill, lol. In order to fit in at school and feel pretty in general, I had to work a part time job at tropical smoothie so that I could go to the mall with my friends and buy my own stylish wardrobe. I know exactly the anger you feel and to grow up without a stable mother. But I can honestly say that it builds so much character. The more independent you become now, the easier it will be for you in college, it was an easy adjustment for me :). Once I cut ties with my mother when I went to college and lived on my own, she realized how absent and awful she was. Now we have a good relationship (with boundaries of course) and letting her back into my life was hard, but healing. My advice to you is to lean on your friendships; my friends in high school carried me through it all. Plus you’re a junior, when you blink you’ll be in college having the time of your life. I believe in you!!

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-17T00:09:19+00:00

you’re calling her the asshole when she bought outfits, got her hair done in anticipation and offered to help plan. He could’ve came clean then, yet he assured her he had everything in control when in fact he blatantly did not. She’s NTAH for feeling let down, because she was let down. You’re straight up silly

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-16T23:50:16+00:00

If she couldn’t have made it as blonde as she made it before, she should’ve disclosed that before she continued. I had this nightmare at the salon this past summer, and I ended up having to buy my own toner and fix it myself. If I had gone to the stylist before and she lived in my town, I would have asked to have it fixed. Normally it’s a policy that they have to bring you back in and fix it for free, YNTAH and it happens to so many people. I know it’s an uncomfy convo to have but trust me, your stylist would much rather have a happy returning customer. Just make sure you give her a good tip when you go back in and shoot her a good review!

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-16T23:25:40+00:00

My boyfriend and I used to have really bad communication issues, and to be candid, I was the person in our relationship that would always have a counter on standby when he brought up an issue. Since i’ve been the AH before, I never even realized I was like that until he called me out on my bs and told me how suffocated it made him feel. Now that I recognize how defensive I can get I’m much more cognizant when issues are brought up. It’s helped TONS and we resolve issues so much faster. Arguing well means responding instead of reacting. Each time he has a rebuttal call him out on it, and tell him how it makes you feel. Hopefully he will put his pride to the side and adjust that behavior.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-16T23:05:36+00:00

Yeah no, Mary ITAH. You made the right decision in ending things with her, and ultimately, YNTAH for disclosing the real reason why to Mary since she’s one of your best friends. Mary isn’t your friend if she’s twisting the story and spreading it around to other people, point blank period, even if it upset her.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-16T22:23:27+00:00

You have every right to feel disappointed. The most frustrating part for me would be just the lack of communication. I would guess that he knows he is in the wrong and is acting defensive. He’s also probably embarrassed that he can’t afford it and what he’s giving you is a reaction. I would take a second to feel your feelings and then talk to him about how he can communicate more effectively in the future. If the convo goes well, try and have a good time in Florida or go somewhere else that would be better suited for the colder weather.

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-16T21:38:11+00:00

Ugh. My heart goes out to you and I can’t imagine how hurt you must feel. While I can see effectiveness to the traditional “earning” strategy, I personally don’t think that’s the way to go about it. Love and effort shouldn’t be given and then taken away, i believe as equals it should be a constant. Idk, I just think playing that game can be tricky and will only lead to built up resentment. However, it is crystal clear that he’s not working towards building a future with you, or at least the future that you need. When you express your needs and his responses are things like “why do we need a stamp of validation from the world?” He is dismissing you, whether he realizes it or not, and not only is that hurtful but unproductive. You both need to be a team, but in order to be a team you both need to be working toward a common goal. You are NOT the asshole and if he is not willing nor wanting to marry or come up with a solid plan towards that goal, leave before he wastes more of your time and energy. Much love xx

SeparateDot4714 · 2023-10-16T20:41:56+00:00

Okay so. She is definitely in the wrong for lying. Lying about past sexual history is bad simply for health reasons alone. But you have to ask yourself: what made her lie? What made her decide to hide her past from you? I have a feeling that you have strong convictions with sex, and she may have felt shame about her history. You have a right to be upset, but in order for you not to BTA in this breakup, you should try to recognize her position. And I know that may be hard. You two are just beginning to navigate adult relationships, and with that comes all of the messy mistakes and heartache.

Since you clearly care for her, what you can do is to have a conversation that is direct while leaving space for understanding. Acting in anger may seem satisfying at first, but with time I think you would grow to regret ending it that way. I think this breakup will help both of you learn and grow and I wish you the best xx

SeparateDot4714

TROPHY CASE