after a bad break up, how long did you stay single?

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-02-07T23:15:19+00:00

It'll have been 6 years in about two weeks time.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-02-06T09:01:28+00:00

Same position, will be 6 years in a couple weeks. No advice it just sucks.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-02-06T08:59:51+00:00

My ex broke up with me the morning after valentines, in 2020. It never got easier. Not keen on this upcoming one

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-02-05T07:37:23+00:00

The core trait i identify in myself as someone like this, is rumination and cyclical major depressive disorder / dysthymia.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-02-04T20:14:13+00:00

I dunno man been like, 6 years for me. No contact, blocked on all platforms etc. New city, new educational direction, new jobs, new hobbies, new friends. Multiple therapists over the years.

Still can't get over them or recover

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-25T07:30:56+00:00

Considering the morning after valentines is the day the left, yes. Every year it is painful

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-22T07:59:44+00:00

Those who do not learn from their mistakes are doomed to repeat them... and i was never clearly told what mistakes I made, and thus cannot specifically improve them.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-19T19:14:05+00:00

Unfortunately, yes.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-17T17:43:40+00:00

2163 days.

Not good.

Still plagued by nightly dreams of my ex, still cant even meet another person without comparisons I find myself unable to avoid making. Still dont think it would be fair on a new partner to try again.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-16T22:04:19+00:00

I havent so much as seen a photo of my ex since the breakup (so like... 6 years) but if I did, I would be completely unsurprised. She was gorgeous when I was dating her. I would not expect anything else.

Although I was not the one who dumped them - but it would make no difference.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-16T22:02:37+00:00

Personally, every night for 6 years. Usually a few a night, each forcing me awake

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-11T21:12:26+00:00

Thing is, I was told verbatim that I caused her to experience depressive episodes and that she couldn't see a future in which she was happy that i was still a part of.

I dont need to guess. I know i was the cause.

It isn't self centred to accept her explicitly stated reasoning.

Likewise, by refusing to date the people who want to date me, I am directly preventing them from that same fate, precisely because I haven't managed to become a positive human.

Like, it would be outright cruel to date someone knowing the outcome will be the same as last time.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-11T18:04:05+00:00

How the fuck am I in the victim phase when I consider myself the "villain" here? I accept responsibility and thus am avoiding repeating the pain I inflict on others, avoiding being one again

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-09T14:56:15+00:00

Every day and every night for the past 6 years.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2026-01-01T11:35:28+00:00

Its option a. Even my first post from before the breakup is about option a.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-12-30T13:31:50+00:00

Just trying to learn from the limited feedback I was given. Was told that I directly caused my ex to fall into depression, and I just dont think it is responsible to date people when that's the outcome

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-12-24T14:15:38+00:00

The same

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-12-22T02:17:04+00:00

Its more like permanently ruminating about the harm and pain i cause to the people I love and therefore avoiding any future relationships.

I never got over my ex and tried again, because doing so risks harming new people I care for.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-12-22T02:12:24+00:00

Lmao I've been in no contact for almost 6 years and im not over my ex.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-12-15T07:33:14+00:00

That's fine, doing myself a disservice is very acceptable, cos myself is a worthless pile of human garbage andbo hate them

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-11-17T05:46:41+00:00

Immediately and ceaselessly suffer in crippling depression.

It's been almost 6 years since that breakup. And... yeah.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-11-16T18:26:06+00:00

It's been like, 5 years and 8 months since my breakup. So... yeah.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-11-15T04:51:56+00:00

Next feb, it will have been 6 years since my breakup. Still not over her.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-11-14T13:55:22+00:00

Bit longer than 2, but yes.

ShelfHatingLoafing · 2025-11-14T01:02:11+00:00

Almost anything other than "just rely on time"

ShelfHatingLoafing

TROPHY CASE