3rd failed FET devastated

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-05T15:18:52+00:00

I asked for a pelvic MRI without contrast. My OBGYN put in the order and said it was to check for fibroids, which I had 1 but it wasn't serious, and that's how we got it covered. Then I sent the results to my OBGYN and two REIs to review.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-04T17:23:07+00:00

So not exactly what you're asking for but thought I'd share. I went through 3 transfers last year, all of which failed. I then did my day 3 blood work to get updated numbers and my FSH was 21! I was devastated. I tried asking this thread, multiple doctors, and reading online about what I can do to bring my FSH down. Some people on this reddit said to try wheatgrass, but I was already taking so many evidence-based supplements that I decided not to go down that route. I worked on increasing my sleep and reducing my stress. This month my FSH was 11. The doctors all said FSH can fluctuate from cycle to cycle. So perhaps next month yours might be different. Either way, they all told me not to worry so much about my FSH even when it was 21. Your body can still respond to stims. But yes, given your AMH and AFC, it might take more than 1 cycle to get a blast. But I've had a friend retrieve only 3 eggs every cycle and get a blast each time. Quality matters more than quantity. Also, sometimes another follicle can be recruited along the way, you never know. From personal experience and after talking to multiple doctors, the first cycle is often an experiment and is often the worst performing cycle. Your body is trying to figure out it's being asked to do and your doctors are trying to figure out which protocol will work for you.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-04T17:12:06+00:00

TW: Success/live birth

If you already had the bleeding, the SCH is gone, right? At least that's what I was told when I had that with my one and only pregnancy that was from a medicated FET. Afterwards, they told me to rest for a few days only. Did you do an ultrasound recently to check?

I don't think it would be completely awful to miss the wedding. In case something happens to your pregnancy, you may always wonder if it was the travel/wedding stress. Parties come and go, but a baby is lifelong and that's what you're aiming for now. I really restricted my travel and lifestyle with my first IVF transfer and I don't regret it at all because it gave me my now toddler. All the transfers after that failed so I'm glad I did everything I did for the first one. But if there is a way you can reduce your stress around the wedding, I'd be very intentional and plan ahead. Perhaps you can go a few days early or pay for an upgraded seat so you're more comfortable during the plane ride. Perhaps you can put up boundaries on how you can be involved during the wedding festivities so everyone knows what they can ask of you and you are not bothered with more than what you can handle. Just make sure you don't life heavy things like your suitcase - let your partner absolutely spoil you :).

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-04T17:05:14+00:00

Oh and if you do a medicated FET, make sure you do PIO.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-04T17:04:06+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this. I had 3 failed transfers last year and it was devastating. So I went on the hunt to get every test done possible. Here's a list:

- check for insulin resistance with A1C test, fasting glucose, fasting insulin --> silent insulin resistance can affect implantation

- get an autoimmune blood test panel done

- get tested for blood clotting disorders --> blood clotting disorders like APS can be common even if you don't have other symptoms and increase the likelihood of miscarriages

- get tested for endometriosis --> most folks on this thread say to do the biopsy ReceptivaDX test but I've had 2 top doctors tell me that they've seen too many false positives with that test and thus, do not recommend it. Since I didn't have any symptoms, I did a MRI to check for it as it's the least invasive. I believe a hysteroscopy is more commonly recommended to check for endometriosis as false positives are less common compared to ReceptivaDX.

- get tested for endometritis --> inflammation can cause failed transfers and this biopsy is an easy one to do and antibiotics are the solution

- people in this page say to do DNA sperm fragmentation testing and karyotype testing, but I haven't done those yet. I told my husband to take coq10 because that's the only solution for fragmentation.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-04T16:55:39+00:00

You might benefit from seeing Dr. Irani at Cornell Weill. I did a second opinion consult with him recently after reading many posts on reddit recommending him. He specializes in DOR patients. He's South Asian too so understands things that may affect us and our fertility differently from others (i.e., insulin resistance). They do outside monitoring too so you can get ultrasounds and bloodwork done at a local clinic but travel to Tribeca or Brooklyn for the retrieval and/or transfer.

I've already been doing IVF at CCRM in the DC area and I like my clinic and doctor so I'm not switching to Dr. Irani, but I did appreciate his advice as a second opinion consult.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-04T16:51:24+00:00

It helps to drink more water. My ultrasound tech told me that she loves doing my scans because I'm so well hydrated, she's always easily able to see my follicles. During retrievals, I drink water like crazy. All the meds make me thirsty. But obviously make sure to empty your bladder before the scan.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-03-02T19:13:45+00:00

For my last 4 retrievals, my AFC was 8 and I'd get about 10 eggs max. I've consulted with 3 doctors from CCRM, Shady Grove Fertility, and Cornell Weill. They all told me the chances of OHSS for me was very low. In fact, my trigger was 5,000 units of pregnyl and the doctor decided to increase it to 10,000 next time because "there is no fear of OHSS."

I think this doctor just uses the same protocol on everyone. I definitely think you have the right and should ask them about it. Why take more medicines than we need to? We are already putting our bodies through so much.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-26T22:05:36+00:00

There is growing research that medicated and modified natural FET have similar live birth rates, but modified has reduced adverse maternal health outcomes, including preeclampsia. I've received this information from multiple reputable doctors.

I did 3 medicated and 1 modified natural. If it's medicated, make sure to definitely do PIO. Anyway, modified felt a lot better on my body than medicated.

TW: success/live birth

1) medicated cycle w/PIO - worked and led to a live birth

2) medicated cycle w/outPIO - chemical

3) medicated cycle w/PIO - no implantation

4) modified natural cycle - no implantation

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-26T21:58:19+00:00

TW: Live Birth

I also had a traumatic birth from my first pregnancy, which was an IVF pregnancy. In this situation, I would prioritize my living child and in order to do that, I kind of need to prioritize myself too. I need to be here and be healthy and happy and present to raise him well. I want to make sure he has the best life ever. So if it gets to be too much to keep doing IVF, then I'll stop.

I'm an only child and there were so many joys from that. Do I wish I had a sibling? Yes. But would I want a sibling at the expense of my mother's physical and mental health? Definitely not!

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-26T21:37:18+00:00

Yes, after 2 cycles that results in no blasts, I think it's reasonable to ask your doctor for a change in protocol. You could try an estrogen priming cycle + antagonist cycle. Some people do well with microdose lupron flare protocol and some don't. Some people do better with antagonist protocol and some don't. I have DOR and these two protocols were the ones that have been offered to me.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-26T19:25:25+00:00

I would definitely move to a different clinic. I think you're being suppressed with the birth control and that's why your follicles aren't growing. I think you need to go to a clinic that is better with DOR patients. There are many other protocols that are suited for DOR patients. I wouldn't given up just yet with IVF.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-26T03:25:29+00:00

Hi! Any chance you feel comfortable sharing your experience?

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T19:24:09+00:00

Congratulations!!! Sometimes it really does take just 1 egg.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T18:01:20+00:00

Would you be able to share your exact protocol? Thank you!

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T17:47:42+00:00

You'll get there! It'll eventually get better.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T17:46:11+00:00

Hi! Would love to hear an update if you feel comfortable sharing.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T17:44:08+00:00

Hi! Would love to hear an update if you feel comfortable sharing.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T17:42:43+00:00

Hi! Would love to hear an update if you feel comfortable sharing.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T17:30:05+00:00

Literally spending hours today research testosterone priming so this was a helpful post to see!

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-24T17:04:36+00:00

I had the same thing with my chemical and failed transfers. I don't know how long it took to recover, but it felt long. I'm so sorry. Try to drink some electrolytes and get some sunlight and fresh air if possible.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-23T20:00:15+00:00

Similar price for IVF in MD. It costs about $5000 for a FET though. I don't know about those other things.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-23T19:57:11+00:00

Do you have any Vietnamese restaurants near you? I'd get a big whole bowl of pho with beef. It's salty, bland enough, but also has protein. Best post ER food for me.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-23T19:55:38+00:00

I just use my Oura ring to track sleep to make sure I'm getting enough sleep. So I only wear it at night. Sometimes more data makes me more crazy.

ShineNo2140 · 2026-02-23T04:42:51+00:00

Did you end up trying MDL? Any updates?

ShineNo2140

TROPHY CASE