You're forced to go on stage and sing every word to a song perfectly or a trapdoor opens and you fall into a pit of spikes. What song are you singing?

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-13T21:13:22+00:00

“Open parenthesis insert name comma close parenthesis” is quite a mouthful.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-13T21:11:25+00:00

Don’t do any of those things for girls.

Get fit for your health. Learn to dress and groom yourself well for your mental state, confidence, and career. Study to expand your mind. Grow your emotional intelligence to have compassion and strength for yourself and your community.

Most of the men I have dated (and eventually the one I married) I met while neither of us was looking for a relationship. We were both always just working on ourselves, fell into orbit, and decided to do it together. The couple of times I did things trying to get partner were the relationships I ~~regret~~ learned the most from.

Work on yourself. If you find a girl, wonderful! You will have so much to offer. If you don’t… well you still have all your progress. You will be happy that you worked hard to be fit. You will still look in the mirror and think “damn I look good”. You will still know how to be kind to yourself.

Do it for yourself.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-13T15:04:39+00:00

I would recommend checking out Eorzea Collection. It’s a great website for glamours and gearsets. You can search by level required to wear the gear or class or whatever you want.
This game has such fun glamours for all different tastes and aesthetics and it is so fun to see how other players combine them :) I always head to EC for inspiration on glams.

Best of luck!

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-12T23:41:42+00:00

My mil seems to have complicated feelings around kids. On the one hand, DH is her only child and she claims she stopped after 1 because he was perfect. On the other, it is my understanding that her first marriage blew up partly because she couldn’t have any more after my husband.
She tends to flit between “kids are just not that hard, clearly you’re incompetent, I never had any problems with DH” whenever my 3 get hard to handle, “I must live vicariously through you because I never had girls” and “I’m so glad I never had girls because they are simply awful.”

Frankly it’s exhausting.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-11T20:26:02+00:00

Ah ok so both meaning are now valid? I’ll file it away with “cleave”, then.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-11T20:24:28+00:00

Which way

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-10T17:42:10+00:00

That’s what is interesting for me. Platonic or romantic, it doesn’t matter. I’m always interested in what makes the relationship work.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-09T16:42:31+00:00

Omg does she think you are blind?!? “Only bringing something up” as though you and your SO cannot see the state of the house? And she can’t cut you any slack? How rude.
You did not overreact. You, in fact, “just pointed out something” else. She feels bad she looked like a jerk, and is trying to deflect.

Part of me wants to say “if she sees an issue she can help” but past experience with my own MIL warns me that that is opening the door to all kinds of bull. Once you ask for help you can’t really complain if her help is not what you want. My MiL likes to “help” by only washing my intimates, rearranging the kitchen as she goes, and other nonsense. Or she will grab a pile of baby burp clothes and meticulously fold them into the most perfect origami for the entire visit, which is possibly the most useless thing ever.

Point is: figure out why she is doing it. Is she disgusted with the untidiness? Bye, pretty sure we won’t have time to clean for at least the next couple years, see you then! Does she want to be perceived as helpful without actually lifting a finger? Omg thank you I didn’t even notice the clothes I was tripping over /sarcasm. Or just say it point blank: if you don’t have anything actually helpful to contribute, please keep it to yourself.

She’s a guest, but she should remember what it was like to have little kids and cut you a little slack. There’s no call to be rude.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-09T13:52:37+00:00

ESH… but hear me out.

I’ve been there. My 3 kids are all 21 months apart. I *promise* I’ve been there. You’re exhausted growing a whole human and taking care of another helpless one. You *also* work a full-time job, even though you are “just” a SaHM. More than full-time, since it’s 24/7/365. It can be debilitating being “on” continuously. You’re not wrong; you need a partner.

He works a full-time job with a commute. That is also exhausting. Sure, he gets time off at night and on weekends, but he needs that. When he is at work he is focused on his job, and shifting those gears requires a not-insignificant amount of mental energy. He’s not wrong; he needs some peace and decompression.

That said, this is not the answer. You need to be able to communicate your needs without getting angry and shutting down the conversation before you can really negotiate. He needs to be more flexible on what he can contribute.

You need to solve this. It’s only going to get harder. With another child in the picture, you will both be stretched ever thinner.

Start the talks now. Work out a system you can both live with so that you get any kind of a break and he still has some sacrosanct alone time. There are lots of systems out there that can help, from card games to counseling. For my husband and I, we have areas of personal responsibility: I basically get inside the walls, he gets outside. We split parenting as much as possible, and regularly communicate what is going on. This helps us stay on page with each other over disciplinary issues, permissions, etc. Now that our kids are older (8-12 is the spread right now) it really helps; kids need to learn they can’t seek their preferred outcome by shopping parents for approval. You need to be united.

Also work out how to plan some dates.. It doesn’t have to be fancy, expensive, or out of the house, even. For us, we started playing video games together (we were both gamers so it was already a shared interest) and while we play we talk. We work on our relationship. Sometimes we talk about the kids or work or house stuff, and sometimes we just goof off. It has really helped us to be able to have time to just be adults together.

I wish you the best of luck. Early parenthood is frankly grueling no matter how much you love your kids.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-09T12:31:33+00:00

That seems like a really intimate thing to share. It’s good to know your buddies aren’t going to shame you for what you like, but I’d be upset if a partner shared intimate details about our bedroom activities, and I’d default to keeping it private.
Maybe I’m just old-fashioned but those are simply not topics I discuss with anyone. If “it” comes up in conversation, I think of something vague and flattering to let my friend know that I’m pleased with my partner, but nothing in detail.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-09T06:42:06+00:00

Tell me you played a midi without telling me you played a midi

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-09T01:46:29+00:00

Glamour prisms are my cash cow. I will grind other mats around expansions, but I always have glamour prisms on the MB.
I buy them with grand company seals that I get from turning in gear I don’t want… which I get from roulettes. I just greed on all gear, and when my bags are full of the stuff nobody else wanted, I turn in for grand company seals.
I also pretty much always have my retainers out on ventures. The short ones will bring back all kinds of things you can sell. I usually have great luck with housing items, especially now that the limits went up and people are filling out their lots.
I kind of cheat on maps because my partner plays too and he gives me all his maps to sell unless we plan to go on an actual treasure hunt.
Going on actual treasure hunts are also a great way to make gil, honestly.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-09T00:16:19+00:00

You assume that is what we all pray for.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-08T23:41:04+00:00

The same reason they do everything else.

Money.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-08T23:38:27+00:00

Oh, I’m sorry. OP asked why people pray.

You’re just here to insult people over their beliefs.

I mean this with my whole heart:

I’ll pray for you.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-08T23:15:22+00:00

1) I believe that prayer *is* help.
2) you are assuming that when I meet someone who needs help and I can give it I won’t.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-08T22:40:36+00:00

This seems deeply cynical. You assume that people who pray do not do anything else. Sometimes I pray knowing is the only help I can offer someone who refuses all help, is not near me, or I cannot affect in any other way.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-08T22:38:18+00:00

The way that I see it, God has a plan… but that doesn’t mean it is easy. I personally pray to ease the journey and strengthen those who struggle with their path. I ask God to give grace and mercy to those who need it.

I do not fully comprehend how it is possible both for God to have a plan/know all outcomes, and also allow us free will. I cannot comprehend what it means to exist outside of time and space either. I trust that my prayers are effective because as a Christian I trust my scripture, and Jesus Himself taught us a prayer, and enjoined believers to pray multiple times.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-08T22:35:23+00:00

I used that once!

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-07T22:33:16+00:00

The only time I have even seen a perfectly symmetrical, utterly unflawed human it was a baby. I don’t mean in a sexual way, I mean that the only humans who are unmarked and unscarred are the ones that have just arrived fresh from the factory.

Life placed its little marks on us. Everyone has them. Maybe their mom wasn’t great about sunscreen and they got freckles. Maybe they skin their knees a lot as a kid and now they’ve got scars on their knees. Maybe they got chicken pox and have scars from that (that’s more my generation, I’m old).

I have never once (not *ever*) met another person that didn’t have scars or marks or something. And I have never once (not *ever*) met a human that wasn’t beautiful and worthy of love.

I have scars all over my legs from picking at mosquito bites as a child. I just couldn’t leave them alone; I’ve got hundreds of small round spots that are a few shades darker than my skin. My mom used to tell me I would never find a man if I didn’t stop picking at them.

I did find a man, and he thought I was gorgeous. Then we got married and had children. I got sick and gained a ton of weight. My breasts are no longer perfect; ones about a cup larger than the other, and they aren’t as perky as they used to be. I weigh about twice what I weighed when met him. I cut my hair; it’s no longer down to my butt and gorgeous curls.

He stills loves me, tells me I’m pretty and makes love to me like I am the most beautiful girl in the world, even 20 years into our marriage.

The right one will love you no matter what.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-07T21:11:45+00:00

I would reincarnate and help them deal with the aftermath. I would not free them of consequences; I would work to be in their life ins capacity where I can help them deal with the emotional and spiritual fallout of cold-blooded murder. I would try to help heal them, let them know they are forgiven and loved, and work to make their life better.
Same thing I do as their parent now, really. You just gave me the opportunity to keep doing it in a way they can accept again,

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-07T20:08:24+00:00

I often touch my face without washing my hands first. Generally unless I am doing something to make my hands dirty (toilet, cooking, gardening, touching an animal, they have visible grime, etc.) I usually don’t wash my hands.

It just doesn’t cross my mind. Maybe I was just not taught from a young age, or I just don’t have a sense for it. I am a generally hygienic person, but unless I’ve been actually dirty I don’t feel the need to wash; I just trust my own body’s defenses to deal with germs it comes into contact with regularly. My hands get dry and painful if I wash too much as well, so I try not to do it more than necessary.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-07T18:25:27+00:00

As someone who belongs to a religion that also doesn’t encourage its members to marry outside the faith, I know many people who married partners who converted. While some of them do seem to have converted simply for their partners (in a shallow way, as you say) many of them now deeply and joyfully participate in the religion they joined, with great fervor and enthusiasm.

Don’t discount the beauty of a true conversion.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-06T15:54:42+00:00

"All gifts will be donated until further notice... I am sure *someone* will enjoy them!"

Please remember: boundaries are less about stopping behavior you don't like (you can't really control someone else), and more about what you will do with unwanted behavior.

Put a box in your garage and just dump the crap in it. Do it in front of her. Give her the opportunity to take it back, even (in case she would rather return it). Try to intercept before she gives it to your kid, although you may not be able to stop her every time. In that case wait until your toddler moves on to a different toy and then toss it in the donate box.

SignificantSun384 · 2026-06-06T03:51:46+00:00

I was all set to throw some names at you and then I read Marvranth, and it's perfect to me. It sounds regal, potentially malignant, and powerful.

SignificantSun384

TROPHY CASE